There have been tears.
There have been faded memories.
There have been lost causes and broken hearts.
We have felt that falling in our stomachs
that comes before the pit.
We have bitten back words
that should have been set free.
We have needed closed arms that should
have been opened.
We have found ourselves in
unfriendly territory and
stayed.


We have been lost.


But we have found light.
We have felt joy.
We have laughed with meaning.
We have cried with happiness.
And we,
through the closing of coffins and building
of cradles,
the lifting sensation when a child giggles
and the wrenching sound of a breaking heart,
and these other many
and great things that are
life,
we have danced.

Whoever said kisses
taste like sugar

has
either
no experience

or no imagination.

the night consisted of me hinting at the presence of a guy
a guy i really like, a guy whose name
like a reverie, i could not bring myself to utter

i talked about everything because i do not care
i do not care about you, your enamoured face, your
saccharine words, instead i batted them away
as if they were unwanted flies harassing a dim light
of which they are enraptured by, devotedly yet
foolishly

by the end of the night i had grown tired of entertaining
the ghost of the guy whose name i could not utter
of glimmering gutlessly at my blatant apathy
of being a subject of novelty

you were the kid, strung on by a piece of nothing
and i was the power-bearer, merciless in
faithless speeches, indulgent in frivolousness
so i halted the meet, streamed mindlessly towards
a place where i renounced my false interest
my douchebaggery, then proceeded to wipe off
the kiss you'd left on my unwitting, unwelcoming lips

i do not like you, do not want traces of you to
envelope, overwhelm the traces of him on me
but i don't think they ever will

So many thoughts
I cannot fathom
to turn a simple inkling
of an idea
into a painting of passion.

With so much being drawn
in my canvas
I cannot help
but scrap
everything I know

i don't know how to talk to you-
      i don't know where to start with you,

i thought this was a ship
       worth sailing

"dreary weather
        no match for us"

then,
      it started hailing

you took cover
     hid from feelings
of doubt

i put a shield  
    between us

i only wanted
     to protect you

or at least make you feel
      just as i had
  with you

no calls
   no texts
between us

a clean break
    with a messy outcome

avoiding you everywhere
      so you'd forget

no

      this is not a letter to you
merely an adieu

     i'm posting this on your wall
           to let the world know
        how people can fall
                     in love
               and out

we wounded up here
    on an island of fear

our ship had long sunk
      all our treasures
in its trunk

the ocean washing
    away our sandcastles

leaving a salty foam
       in its place

i dream
    of you from time
to time

you were a drink
    i liked
             for a while

a summertime destination
    an iced-beverage infatuation
    
                and

in case you were wondering
         your taste
is lime

green trees
     green grass
         green light
              (oh)
fast

yellow bricks
      yellow road
           yellow light
               (my)
faster

amber hair
      amber eyes
           amber light
             (God)
too fast

red heart
    red blood
       red light
         (!)
impact

blue lips
     blue skin
          blue bed
           (I)
rush

blurry touch
    blurry eyes
        blurry words
          (love)
sinking

dizzy spell
    dizzy haze
        dizzy thoughts
          (you.)
*falling

"stop trying to make the words
sound pretty
and just say it."
"i'm not-"
"yes
you are."
you
were correct.
i was
looking for
the most
beautiful
words
to say
such an
ugly
thing.
and now that i
reflect on that
i am
proud
of my attempts
to decorate
the words.
it takes great
skill
to do such
tasks
and you
should
not
rush
the
beautifying
of
such
unattractive
things.

hands.
illuminated by the
golden morning light.
these hands
have met many
very important
hands in this
short week.
hands that will
never
remember the
clasp
the firm shake
or the simultaneous
release.
they won't recall
the insignificance
of these tiny
young
hands.
but if anything,
these hands left
fingerprints
on a world
much bigger
than
their
own.