She loves to be loved, It’s her favorite thing.
It’s her weakness and ours too.
Craving to be held, protected, safe.
We instantly fell for it.
Belonging to something again.

Now she lives with us.
Or should I say we live with her?
It certainly seems that way sometimes.
Sleeping in our bed when we aren’t there.
Dreaming of catching something fun.

When you see those eyes, deny their gaze.
Or else you’ll fall for it too.
And it will rest coiled in your lap.
Loving to be loved, living with you.

Jammed up with noise in my ears
I hear at times like this
It becomes easy to ignore
A face full of snot and tears
Like a fresh bowl of ****
Dissonance warms me to the core

All of my pain disappears
With a deafening kiss
I can be such a ******* *****
When the cacophony sheers
Straight through the dark abyss
Covering me in blood and gore

I’m a bit of a hedonist
oozing with confidence.

to determine value
pick one or the other.

at the mercy of entropy
life is worth less than what?

can all the expressions
contain such a feeling?

to bleed a river but never
clean up the ****** mess.

pain is pleasurable
and pleasure is painless.

after you have hit the bottom
where do the tunnels lead?

when my hands are filthy
will I still find freedom?

don’t forget balloons
the pizza is gross
and all the people
don’t say a word

the magic begins
soon as my life
seems to be ******
and full of fun

have some sangria
it’s all fiction
in this old hotel
we dance within

to see so many
years spent alone
we party tonight
and welcome home

keep spending green

cold shoulders
whats your name
a la la

our new machine

eyes sharpen
some human
glazzy

looks so clean

resembles
mystery

green apple cinnamon
warm caramel drizzle
chocolate frosting flowers

happy birthday happy birthday
give me cake, I eat my cake

have a hard day well then you have to realize theres one place that you have to find I know this place as tirelessly as the next guy he tells me theres no place like home one along the shore just like home I bet there's nothing quite like the shore I'll tell ya I once found a place along the shore of my mind theres nothing quite as fast and frivolous as that I think its coming and going now its something like a speeding bullet to mars and I think we just found that peace within ourselves but be careful because I think there's something up with that awfully scary looking badger in the corner there watch out for him he might try to bite your ankles or something rash like I swear it I know who the real people are around here trust no other man I can find you a flavour anywhere anyway you want it delivered to your buds that'll warm you right up it'll feel like firing pistons off in your gasket.

drunk wide awake
lying on my side
shorthand dreaming
of my favorite place
and all the bodies
that they improvise
another piece dies
festers and rots
i am new to this
feeling all tight
beneath my chest
dodging bullets
everyone laughing
along to the music
demanding blood
hitting the floor
every night out
*****
*****
*****
*****
*****
******* it

catch a note forward
in the basket of quality
often deciding what is likely
so fast and frivolous these days
words becoming more and more
of a plainsong drone inhabiting such
a confined area upstairs (but more of a)
downstairs situation and
i’ve forgotten what
that exactly
means
but

we were talking
i hear many things
great party we enjoyed
smart boy you must have
glancing along the tight rope
i can never tell never which kind
of man i am if it’s not love (personified)
then hate me softly please
and we should forget
what that all
means
but

it’s another poem
some slurring or another
maybe they will find someone
and i’m sure it will if nothing else
decadence is just around the corner
one could lose themselves (in possibilities)
the maddening uncertainty
and i don’t think i
will ever
forget
it

Me encanta un alma pesada, muy tierna.
Manos arriba, no mueva,
Soy culpable.

Ven conmigo,
Mi corazón está agrio, entrégalo aquí.
Dámelo y gíralo alrededor.

Ya que te sientes triste,
Tú debes gustarle.
Todo lo que amo no es feliz.

Completamente solo, sin cuidado.
Desde que la luz del sol derritiendo,
He tenido un alma pesada, muy tierna.

The stupor came to a rest.
As long as you keep breathing you’ve won this fight.
Forget this terrible vibration, worthless.
No point in pondering unimaginable secrets.
It’s merely gibberish, product of a foul paranoia.

I had hair on my tongue... the mind is easily fooled.
Realize a thought, but remember to follow peace and tranquillity.
Pleasant music fills my ears.
Don’t fear, one could settle quickly and enjoy a dream.

The air was thin to breathe.
I found what we were looking for, at last a fair excuse to celebrate.
An ocean of spectacular fluorescence.
Whatever happened, it was going to be good for us.

I woke up with the sun in my eyes.
Then fell back asleep, too comfortable in my dreams.
Something about spending the night with you.
Again I awoke, this time panicking for I realized I was late.
That ******* alarm had been sleeping too.
I neglected my routines and left my four cornered room, practically falling down the stairs.
Punctuality is a human invention, I thought, don't they know it's unhealthy to always be in a rush?

Time has been accelerating as of late, it must be.
It feels like just yesterday I was working alongside my colleagues, paving away for our futures, healing a prosperous community of lovers and friends, finding true happiness.
But that was over two weeks ago, and again I feel like it was all just a dream.
Sitting here consuming microwavable meals as I hammer incessantly away at my keys hoping to find myself, what a vicious cycle.

Calm down, one goal at a time.
No time is wasted as long as it's spent living.

Something about today, something about this hideous weather and my failure to get out of bed, the guilt, the anger, the fear, all of it.
Somehow I knew that it was going to end with me gripping the side of a toilet seat, spewing my insides out, trying not to pass out as the cacophonous ringing I once described dazes and confuses my thoughtless mind.

Memory by memory...

Poetry, what an idea.

young, standing paralyzed
focused on a persistent ringing
a switch had been pulled
a consonance unreasonably deafening
extinguishes one's will
life fades, leaving a gaunt looking creature
to feel fear now could awaken unfamiliar emotions
but not a moment too soon
conscious movement is observed
stumbling, mind gasping for air, the comfortable sound of light
numb
minus some things
yet cured
the rest is blank

The wall paper peeled back
Exposing the scented stench
Ephemeral fits
Nasal canal molestation
A hint of Spanish ***
And the smoke of an addict's cannabis
***** the temporal lobe memory by memory
The cuticle needles
Scratch the wooden hatch
Wanting again

They took control of your weak impulses
The curse is alive
And they cannot drown
Gag that privileged esophagus
He attempted to speak
Glossolalia vibrations
Make sense in the quietest of rooms

The affliction is the gift
Producing the blueprint of your mind
X-rays of your soul
Barren influence
Soaked by bile and blood
Tears evaporated
A sincere scripture
Human nature
And disintegrated wall paper