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Say hello
Wave goodbye
For you to turn a blind eye on me

I leave without a sound
Walking around the unmoved
To get back home and to my room

You’ve all forgotten
I never needed to be killed off
For you to move on

I isolate my head
Remove it from view of my peers
And no one noticed the body

I hide my hands
Under the table
Ignore the odor of a ******

I’ll always be
Where I am needed
Nowhere
23h · 30
Bloodwood Forest
Dragged down by the dirt and the trees
Buried in a tomb of my fears
Trapped inside a forest of tears

I’ve lost my way
Went too far off the trail
The howling of wolves
And the loss of a sail

I’m running away
Lacking food or a drink
Resorting to bugs
I’m beginning to sink

The deeper I go
The less I’ll know
Carving a knife
With a stick and a stone

No communication
No final goodbye

I’ll feed myself to the wolves
Till I’m nothing but bone

Here they come
There is no goodnight
I’ll say my goodbye
‘Cause I’m gonna die
Lock the door
Toss out the key
There’s one way out
But it’s not for me

Sometimes I lie in my bed
Other times I lie my head
Upon the windowsill
And I sit very still

Looking down
A million cars roll by
Looking up
A billion stars stand by

Sometimes I beg
Dangling my leg
Off the windowsill
I cannot sit still
I jump

Waiting for the crash
As I hit the floor
But for now
I wish I could have
Used the door

Looking up
The stars all frown
Looking down
The cars all drown

In pools of red
I guess I’m dead
I’ll never get up again
I’ll never love again
I’ll never see the end
I’ll never live again

No one ever tries to visit
I thought I’d never really lose it
All my calls for help unanswered
All the nurses hold me ransom

The longer I live on these grounds
The more debt will come around
So I beg for euthanasia
Yet they kept me here for years now

I can’t get up
I **** in a cup
I’ve already given up
On trying to live it up
23h
Scorch
All your possessions lost
Into the burning flame
You take a look around yourself
And wonder who's to blame

You hear the sirens scorch
Into your beating heart
You may have dodged a bullet
But your wife was not as smart

Everything you’ve ever had
Has burned to ash
Or melted to the core
Who would have ever known
Of the pain you had in store

One man you thought you knew
Had turned himself in
His motive was to ****
But not the one who did

He thought you’d lose your life
Trying to save her’s
So if she did escape
She would turn to him
I wish I hadn’t done
What’s already been done
But it’s too late
I wish I hadn’t flown
Too close to the sun
But it’s too late

Sleepless nights
Of long lost times
Writing songs
Of meaningless rhymes
Behind bars
For violent crimes

They don’t care
That I show remorse
Or that I’m on my course
There’s no chance of a parole
So what is the point
Of maintaining some control

Gonna try to get the chair
This is something I can’t bare
There is no way that I care
I will do it on a dare

Gonna fight with all the guards
Gonna scream until I’m sore

Now I’m going to the room
Now I’m gonna face my doom
No last meal for me to taste
Gonna die for the benefit
Of the human race
Smashed my head into the concrete
Glad I’m not dead but I cannot speak
We still lost the game
Last thing I said was quite profane

I still remember everything
But when I speak there is nothing
Sign language no one seems to learn
I can still hear just no more words

Writing down all I think
Cough up blood into the sink
All I do now is I drink
No more words for me to sing

I get beat up
Without a word
Go to class
The teacher swore

I can’t seem to say
What’s on my brain
For there’s no reason to stay sane

I can’t scream when they hurt me
I can’t sleep without worry
I am left without a word
I am left without a world
23h
Sundown
The sun is bleeding out
To the clouds
The vibrant colors fading
To the ground

On a hill
Sitting still
Listening to the sound
Knowing the last thing you’d hear
Was a gun

The rustling of leaves
The chirping of birds
You tell her you love her
As your last words

She declines, you resign
And you fall to your knees
A bullet in your brain
Buzzing like bees

Sun down
Fall down
To the ground
I’m getting old
So no one wants me
Soon I’ll be all on my own

I’m losing hope
Now I cannot see
A family worth calling my home

Ugly children get the bench
Disorders make me jump the fence
The words that never get to live
No talents nor a look to give

Haven’t had an interview in years
All because I look through tears
Of pain and loss that I still fear
My parents’ death is all I see

I’m up in my dreams
Losing it all in memory
23h
Quicksand
It feels like my life’s trapped in quicksand
The more that I try, the worse that I get
The more I believe that I can escape
The closer I feel to death

It’s almost like I’m surrounded by ocean
The longer I swim, the farther I get
The more that I see that there’s no sign of land
The closer I get to an end

It’s kinda like my life’s in the furnace
The longer I stay, the hotter it gets
The more that I feed it with coal and some air
The closer I feel to hell

It’s somewhat like I’m starting to lose it
The longer I look, the harder it gets
The more I believe that it was never there
The closer I get to forget

It’s almost like I’ve got dementia
The more that I think, the less I remember
The longer I live the further I get
From knowing ways I could escape from death
23h
Necessity
Necessity gets the best of me
Impossible to secure my needs
Without responsibility
That I refuse to see

Never had a job
Never wanted one
Yet I look for someone
Who’s more responsible than me

Spoil me with your livelihood
Spoil me with money
Spoil me with kindness
That I’ll so easily abuse

I’ll drop you if you don’t give me
What I always wanted to
I know my words aren’t so great
But without me you would go faint
With your stupid friendly kind of hate

You never give me your money
You never give me your livelihood
You never give me your money
So I’ll drop you like it’s funny
23h
Martyr
A teen on the train tracks
He  very well welcomes death
But I will save him

I’ll be a martyr
I’ll be me
If I save this man
I will be free

I run to the train tracks
Before the train hits
I push him away
And I take the hit

Never knew the man
Never known who he was
Just goes to show
I've done what he does

The conductor cries
The family mourns
They say that I’ve killed myself
When I just saved a life that was
23h
Gone
Gone are the days
That I wouldn’t change
Gone are the ways
That I could have changed
Gone are my friends
Who got through the day
Gone is my hope
That kept me from pain

It’s too late to make amends
My insignificant life is at wits end
I can’t get up from off my bed
I can’t believe it’s all in my head

The memories live through me
By the scars of irresponsibility
They all come back to haunt me
Yet again
23h
Rich Man
“Billionaire died”
The newspaper says
“Father of two”
The obituary read

Sometimes I wonder
What are his regrets?
He lived a life
That most men respect

Many envied
His position
Yet now he’s dead
And in perdition

He had the money
To save millions
He had the power
To affect billions

Yet he sat up in his mansion
Crying over his possessions

Yet in the end
He made himself dead
From nothing to something
From something to nothing
23h
Liar
I’ve lied so much
I believe my own lies
Is this some sort of delusion
Or is it my time to die?

I lie to get places
I lie to get in
I lie to my wife
And I lie to the kids

My life’s a facade
I can’t tell who's who
But whatever you know me as
Is everything but true

I can’t tell if I lied
In the time that we’ve spoken
All I know is a story
That is very broken

I’m a killer
I’m a sinner
I’m a loser
Claimed a winner

I’m on the loose
They don’t know the real me
The real me is dead
Backed by lies of my youth

Just as much as the old me
My victims are dead
For I’m the real criminal
Behind all you dread
23h
Last Time
I want to die without pain
I don’t care that it’s in vain
I can’t stand living in this world
I hope this is the last time

I’m living a nightmare
I’ll condemn myself to hell
Because that’s what I deserve
I hope this is my last life

I’m tired of crying
I’ll confine myself today
I hate watching my tears dry
I hope this is the last time

Why do I have to wait?
We’ll all die sometime!
Why do I have to hate?
Each day of my ****** life!
23h
Shut Out
I’m on a path to isolation
I’m never gonna speak again
I have no need for communication
‘Cause in the end it’s all in our head

I’m gonna shut you out
I’m gonna leave school
I’m gonna go to bed
And never get out

If you want to help me
Slide some food beneath the door
I’ll no longer ask you
Cause then I’d have to speak again

I’ll just do nothing
I’ll sleep and cry and cry again
I’ll just lie there and think
At least I’m not the one who's dead

I’ll never get up
I’ll wither my way into hell
I know I’m not living
All I know is I’m not dead

Force all the thoughts out
I don’t want to feel good
I just want to shut out
The world and everything that could

Forget that I’m living
Just make sure to feed me while I’m here
I’ll lock the door now
And you’ll pretend that I’m not here
23h
Mistaken
You’ve got me mixed up
With another man
I did not take what he’s taken
I do not understand
You’ve gotta be mistaken

I’ve never went to jail
But now my ship has sailed
I’ve never stolen anything
Yet now they’ve stolen me

What makes you think it’s me?
When there is no evidence to be
I try and try and try to plea
But they don’t really care about me

The other man is free
To do and think as he sees
Yet here I am as you see
There’s nothing more to me
23h
Expulsion
Finally lost it
In the middle of class
I guess it was the straw
That broke the camel’s back

I throw my chair
Through the window
Nothing matters
I jump out with it

Second floor was not so bad
I survived and now I’m glad

Expulsion was the price
Of and for my wasted life
I cannot wait to be alone
I’ll live my life without a home
23h
Taxi Man
Keep on driving
Don’t stop moving
This is a threat
This is a threat

The taxi’s driving in the rain
The tensions driving me insane
I just don’t wanna die in vain
Yet still I’m running from the pain

Drop me off
Drop me off by the bridge
Wake me up
Wake me up when I sleep

It’ll be a long way ‘til the drop
Nothing’s gonna make me stop
Gonna listen to the sounds
As I fall and hit the ground

Water isn’t gonna save me
There’s nothing you can to do to stop me
This is a threat, this is a threat

We reach the bridge and I jump off
But looking up I see the man
The driver’s falling off as well

Looks like he felt a similar pain
Guess we’ll both just die in vain

Goodbye mister taxi man
23h
Dividend
The products of a marriage
Divided against themselves
The children split in half
Between two separate houses

The children are the dividend
The half-lives of divorce
No one wants to admit
That they are not at fault

They will never deserve this
Flopped dead like a fish
Evening out the bruises
As a means to an end

Caught up in logistics
They’ll never really know
The reason of divorce
Is nothing but their own

Let the kids down
Let the kids pout
Let the kids drown
Let the kids out
Why should I participate?
In this pointless chase
If I am such a waste

I am no one’s favorite person
I am nothing to myself
I'm not living like I’m sane
I'm just living life in vain

Why should I try to get a life?
When life’s the one thing I don’t like

It’s not about the “if” and “why”
It’s about the when and how I die
There’s just no reason to say goodbye

One day I’ll be gone forever
No one should say never means never
One day I’ll be gone forever
No one should say never means never

I’ll lose it on a dime
It’s only a matter of time
‘Til the glorious day I die
23h
Dead Moth
Going on my nighttime walk
I find a freshly squashed dead moth
It reminds me of my impending doom
Yet I continue my walk
And disregard the moth
And thus fall back into my cocoon

Maybe when I grow old
I’ll be scared and cold
But tonight I’m just a sickly snail
Right now I’m not old
And I’m warm not cold
I guess I’m just one big fail

Why must I hide the truth
And conform to you
I’m nothing but a grain of sand
Why can’t I ignore the truth?
And pretend that I’m of my youth
By now I’m just a sad old man
23h · 16
The Painter
The painter paints from the heart
The painter bleeds out for his art
The painter knows it’s just the start
The painter’s ink has missed the mark

With scars upon his arm
The painter carries on

The painter believes that he’s got time
The painter bleeds another line
The painter breaths another sigh
The painter knows he wants to die

Yet with scars upon both arms
The painter carries on

The painter no longer feels pain
The painter’s just trying to stay sane
The painter draws deep within his veins
The painter paints in crimson waves

Now with scars upon all limbs
He begins realize his chance is slim

The painter ponders his last piece
The painter plasters paper sheets
The painter lays them on the streets
The painter waits for his last feast

The piece is done
No peace within
The car did come
And finished him
Everything I’ve ever done has led to this moment
This moment in time where I breakdown and cry
Nobody ever seems to care until it’s too late

Hopelessly sleeping and wasting away
Hopelessly dreaming of life not this way
Hopelessly feeding on nothing but pain
Hopelessly living with nothing to say

They mourn for the dead even though they can’t hear
Yet they laugh in the face of those that are here
As if resting in peace is living in hell

Hopelessly sleeping and wasting away
Hopelessly dreaming of life not this way
Hopelessly feeding on nothing but pain
Hopelessly living with nothing to say

Step one foot out the door and dart straight back in
The world is too ****** up to be living in
So I’ll stay in in my room, listing out sins

I do not wish to be forgiven
I do not want to be forgiven
I do not wish to be forgiven
I just want a life worth living
Say goodnight
To the moon and the stars
Say goodbye
To the pain and the scars

Do you want to be remembered
as a thief?
Would you hate to be forgotten
In your sleep?

You can cry all you need
‘Cause nothing’s guaranteed
You can die in your sleep
‘Cause life is but a dream

Why should I believe
Your ever lifeless plead
Why should I have grieved
You’re nothing more to me

I could be . . .
Bleeding out the pain
Trying to stay sane
No need for my remains
With a bullet in my brain

Euthanize me
Just wait and see
I can’t **** me
So do it please

It’s just not fair
To be stuck within
A concluding dream
23h
Shattered
We grow close
We grow old
I will crumble
Under shattered souls

Betrayal derailed whatever we had
I’m gone now, a blast from the past
You stab my back until I can’t get up
I’ll never be me again

Stained glass in new church windows
Grab a stone and break some widows
It’s never too late to stick the knife in
You’ll never be sane again

We disperse
We divide
I will fall
And you will rise
The days roll by
Yet they end in a sigh
Like salt from an hourglass
Upon the wounds of my time

For my heart is bleeding
For the death that’s proceeding
Yet after all of these years
I can’t change my ways

For as long as I’m breathing
My mind will be pleading
For an end to all days
And the passing away

When this day shall end
Another shall rise
So what’s left to do but to cry
‘Til the day that I die
3d · 19
Notoriety
Known for the bad
Fought for the good
Thrown in a jail
In all ways he could

Notorious for nothing
Nothing but his own
But when you look into his eyes
You stare into a stone

Remove the bad
Correct the youth
It’s not sad
It’s just the truth

No reflection
Of yourself
He’s not human
Just without
3d
Just Be
Watching my life cave in
Never was a pretty sight to see
Record all my pain on tape
And drown it out with TV

I’m not dead
Just not living
Inside my cocoon
It’s never forgiving

Just like the bible said
“People will seek death,
but death will flee from them”
Just be or be condemned

I’m not here
I’m just drifting
Wish I could give up
On life and existing

Just is not enough
Justice never wrongs
It’s just us left
No need to conceal

I’m not okay
There’s nowhere to hide
Can’t escape from this dream
It’s an endless cry
3d
Memory
I want it lost
I want it erased
I want it gone
Removed from my brain

There’s nothing worth remembering
I’ve seen it all and I want out
I want a fresh start
I don’t want to be wrong

It isn’t my fault
I’m more than unlucky
Open wound with salt
I wanna restart

I watched my world burn
Straight from these eyes
Everyone I’ve ever known
Is no longer alive
3d · 23
Nausea
I can never keep my mouth shut
My life goes on, but all for what?
The more it hurts the more I cut
Today I’m going with my gut

The feeling I get
Staring out at space
I look in the mirror
But I can’t see my face

Paranoia deceives me
So I drank some mace
It’s sad that *****’s the last thing
I’ll ever taste

Nothing ever goes as planned
They’ve stretched me out like a rubber-band
It was only a matter of time before it breaked
Spread my ashes in the lake
Now that I am very old and weak in all my senses
I cannot smell the flesh that surrounds me
Deep within the morgue

Every time I stared into the eyes of the deceased
I grew more and more used to it
And I became numb to the thought
That they all had lives

But now it’s my turn and it’s my time to die
But I don’t want to say goodbye
For the fate of me will be nothing more
Than the fate of those whom I’ve sacrificed

I’ve embalmed all me family
Dug the grave where they’ll rot
But now that it’s my turn
I’ll dig my own spot

Staring down into the hole
In which I’ll be forgotten
Forever and ever and nothing more

It should be deep enough to keep me around
I have many regrets that will weigh me down

I jump, I cry, I lie there
Deep within the ground
3d
Only
I am the only one
The only one that knows
I refuse to eat
I sit with my lunch alone

I only want what I can’t have
I’ll push away the thoughts at hand
Always waiting in a line
The only one without a life

Standing alone in the rain
Crying just to stay sane
If I’ll always be the only one
Then I’d be better dead

I am the only one
The only one that knows
That I won’t last another minute
Standing in the cold

No one cares
Not even me
3d · 11
Nerve
You had the nerve to betray me
And all that I am
All for my wealth
And my soon widowed beldam

The gas is leaking out now
I can barely breathe
I bang on the window
But I’m too weak to recede

Frame it as a suicide
Would have rather been tortured
For months at a time
And I would never waste a dime on you

I put you in my will for a reason
I trusted you in many ways
But only in death
Can I know the truth
3d
Sorry
I need help
And I need you
But if you go
I will too

Stay with me
No need to worry
Just don’t leave
Or you’ll be sorry

Make one wrong move
And it’ll be your last
I’ve got you now
And I’ll get you back

Why are you crying?
Was it something I said?
What are you waiting for?
Go ahead and play dead

I know I’ve done wrong
I know I’ve messed up
I’m ready to go
And I’m sorry
3d
Scab
You’re a scab that never heals
The more I try to help you
The less I have to feel

It’ll never go away
For as long as I pick away
I want to tear you out
I need to help get out

For as long as I peel
The scars will never heal
No need to conceal
The scabs that make me squeal

I know it’s wrong
But it’s what I do
I don’t complain
I’ll laugh at you
3d
Shed
Got bodies in the floorboard
Got shackles in the shed
For if you ever notice me
You’ll end up being dead

You’ll shed a tear
I’ll drink some beer
I’ll live on fear
No way to steer

Got jars upon jars
Of fresh new cremations
For there’s no more room
To give in to temptations

You’ll shed a tear
I’ll drink some beer
I’ll live on fear
No way to steer

Blessed are the meek
So easily abused
So I’ll just sit here
And be oh so easily amused
3d
Crawl
Crawling with my own two hands
I’ve got no legs, no strings attached
Hands sifting through grains of sand
It was never ours anyway

Crawl out of the wreckage
Hope they got our message
Maybe they were reckless
Yet still I hold my necklace

For the love of God
This was never fair
I’ll never walk again
I have no wheelchair

Pray my way back home
There’s no time left to roam
Apply the pressure
Stop the bleeding
Yet now my vision’s fading

Is all this blood a mirage?
3d
Leech
Extortion through violent means
How could I be so blind
Corruption lies in broken lies
They’re like ticks leaching onto mankind

Simply living is the price
To be a martyr for the truth
When dying is the one escape
They'll **** it and frame it was you

Keep them printing
Watch them squinting
For no one comprehends
A number as big as the one at hand

Meat puppets, watch them joke
It’s all planned out, look through their notes
Who would want to know the truth
When if you did you’d be as dead as the youth

The teens in wars, they don’t know why
All they know is propagated lies

Just don’t let this get to you
There’s nothing you could ever do
3d
Snort
Surrounded by fools
They’ll all die someday
They’re all goons
They’ll all fall one day

“Try some” they say
“It’ll soothe your sorrow”
“Try some today”
“No need to borrow”

Lend me your soul through some drugs
Let’s blend into oblivion
Seen through the barrel of a gun
Just fly me to the sun

The way pigs snort
The sheep will follow
The dogs arrest
Them all tomorrow
3d
Matter
What truly matters
When everything will burn
What truly happens?
When I leave this earth

Criticize the optimist
Applaud the pessimist
It’s all sacrilege

What truly happens
When I leave the earth
What truly burns?
When nothing hurts

Criticize the living
Applaud the dead
It’s all without one night’s meds

I have no disorder
Everyone else does
I’m not a pessimist
‘Cause everyone else knows
3d
Icicle
A winter scene
Straight out of a movie
The snow falls down
While the icicles form

I tear one off
And hold it in my hands
I’d shed a tear
But there’s nothing left

The piercing cold
Against my blood
I’m piercing a hole
In my chest to the ground

A winter scene
Straight out of a movie
The snow falls down
While the icicles form
3d
Trucker
The trucker lives in commune
Their job is endless commune
Bringing goods to places
That’s more important than you

Sleeping on the job
Risking lives today
Nothing but a blob
A mindless little face

The trucker sees many things
Yet remembers almost nothing
For when he gets home
He is nothing but a something

On his last day of the job
He thought he would continue
But when the school bus turned around
It smashed into the truck that bound

The children scream
The products burn
Their faceless lives
They’ll never learn
I know you did it to yourself
And now you’re in hell
But today I must say
That I won’t wish you well

A requiem for a suicide?
You know he’s not going to heaven
Why bother lying to yourself?
Just give up this pretending

It doesn’t matter who wronged him
It’s no one’s fault but his
Let’s bury this deep within
And forget about his past existence

As a pastor, I’m not to decide
But in the end you’d rather hide
I’ll hide behind the veil of God
And doing so things won’t go so wrong

Why would you believe
That he’d be in a better place
If you know so well
He shot himself in the face

He knows the consequence
I know ‘cause I taught him
I wish that you’d go away
It’s not like you tried to stop him
I have no money
I’ve so little to give
If this is all there is
I don’t wanna live

Assassinate what’s left of me
For I can’t do it myself
Organs sell for pretty pennies
For I am in good health

Mentally I’m gone
I want it done today
Just take out the trash
There’s nothing more to say

Organs sell for pretty pennies
I want to be dead
Just store my remains
For there will be plenty
Eleven minutes fly by like hours
Until one brave man sat down
Too bad he got picked to die

Applause!
More like pleading
Applause!
My hands are bleeding
Applause!

The clap came and went
The repetition made repent
The letters that I sent
Were open by that man again

Applause!
More like pleading
Applause!
My hands are bleeding
Applause!

What we have as a leader
A dictatorship demeanor
I could never leave her
‘Cause our country makes us cleaner
You are my pacemaker
Without you I will die
You are my lord and savior
Without you I will cry

You’re not like Jesus
You’re human like me
I don’t have much to say
But just wait and see

You are my pacemaker
Without you I will die
Just don’t ever leave me
Or I will get the knife

You’re not like Satan
You’re human just like me
I don’t have much to live for
Yet tomorrow starts another day
Without you
Bent truths
You win, you lose
It ain’t you
So go loose

I’ll bid it all
My house and my cars
My family won’t love me
If I come back with scars

When I lose, I count down
Count down on my arm
So that way I’ll know
When I’ve gone too far

Sleeves of sorrow
Drenched in blood
You’ll never catch me
Disowning my scars

You’ll win it all
Says the man in the suit
Just stare into these eyes
Or you’re gonna cry
Your wrongdoings are manifold
Your recklessness is as it’s told
Your nothing but dust and mold
Your brain has taken its last toll
For you will be punished

I’ve never hurt anyone
Who hasn’t deserved it
Now that I think of it
I sound just like you

I went out of my way
Just to stay sane
Get out of your head
I’m better off dead

In the blink of an eye
I’ll crawl my way back
It’s only a matter of time
But it’s still not enough

You want me living
In a cage in a zoo
Filled with wonderful people
Who are just as bad as you
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