I led you through the mud
Sometimes we leave friends behind
I could tell you were thinking of him
I could tell you were hurting inside
And I couldn’t take your mind off him
But I tried

Snow globe, your glass isn’t easy to break
But you should know, it’s summer out here

I could stare into your blue eyes all night
I could stay with you until die
Put on a song as we search the floors
Go on take your anti-depressants- they’ll make you feel better

Leave me out on the balcony
Wash my feet in your tub
But I think I must go
Down 95, alone with my navigator
We talk- Babel, a long time, but don’t overshoot it
Yeah we could’ve slept together
But sometimes you should sleep alone
Yes, you took me home... but I’ll just tuck you in,
organize the magazines on the coffee table then
turn out the lights
oh
Goodnight, goodnight

Hiding in your bed
Try your tired old mantra
Your affirmation

But it's just talk, talk, talk
and if you stay or go
it's just luck, luck, luck
and I don't know if I give a ****

cuz it's a **** show
and I'm the star, self-medicating

And I'll play the fool because everything's fine
I know it's not real, it's just in my head

Burn it all out
'neath your veil
drink your party all down
blood drains to pale, pale, pale
from my self-medicating

Bells sound alarm
Crossing our hearts
against the dark

Chemicals are all awry
So don't despair
there's nothing there

Intuition
Or just anxious fears?
Guess it all depends on
what you want to hear

I’ma little worse off when you’ve gone
Lungs heavy and dry like old concrete
Orange embers lay like dying stars on the pavement
Winking against the purple-blue night.

I paired you with scotch
Or was it white wine?
I can’t remember for the mute thunder
Blooming in my crown.

I don’t remember much these days
What the boys are saying,
How I am feeling…
How ought I feel?

Good enough-
But not to reach for another
No- I’ll ease back
And relish the memory of you a little while longer.

I wrote you a letter
But did not tear out the page
I will never send it
Because the last one gave you pain

I have not forgotten your number
But I will not call or text
In time I shall forget it
Or so one would expect

Ten digits-
It features three threes and two twos
A sequence branded on the invisible mind
Whether it scars or erodes depends on the path forward

Happy birthday old friend,
You look happy again
Like we once made each other

So, no need for well wishes,
For from my mouth,
I know, I’ve learned-
Can only come selfish reminders

I know what Jesus found
out in the desert-
or perhaps, what He lost

My eyes will never look at you again
at best, they pass over
like unhurried clouds on a windless day

Blooming and expanding
from nothing
churning and sliding west

Memory is just a few shocks
that take me back,
bullet holes that let
light penetrate a sealed room

Drifter you call me; but
I saw my captain's (my brother's) soul
splash and sink into the
thirsty dust

Boys marched in
and ghosts fly home,
unhurried, as clouds
in a windless sky

Your buddy solemnly professing it to you on your roof, the city skyline lit up behind him, you saying, “I know, man, I love you too,” in an almost consolatory fashion because it wasn’t easy for him

Your ex whispering it in your ear before getting into the cab that takes them away from you forever

Mother, her mantra, a reminder, every time you see her

Father, that one time you didn’t **** up, but at least it’s sometimes there behind his eyes

Your sister, even though she’s halfway across the country it picks you up because she’s the only one who understands you and how it feels

Grandfather, you’re ten, despite your size he wants nothing but to hold you on his lap and plant kisses on your head. “Te quiero, te amo,” he mutters into your hair until you finally make up an excuse to get up to go play with your cousins. It’s the second you’ve ever seen him. Maybe he knew it was going to be the last time

When your ex didn’t take you back, after your desperate, last, all out attempt. Crushed, you move and follow your “dream.” Later, much later, you realize they cut them self off from you so you could have it, the dream, they love(d) you so much they let you go because they thought they were holding you back.

A vague spiritualist inspiration
A surreal surrealist practicing divination
Shivers abound for the wondering and the cold
Tumbling into the fathomless unknown

…

Everywhere an altar
Every being a sage
Every step, a falter,
But also, a turn of the page

In the night we plan our great escape
Come the dawn those dreams, they fade away
Oh the summer's end is always so near
What's the difference? It's just another year

Misery is so often self imposed
And I'm tired of being out in
the rain, the snow, the wind-
it howls, it moans

Raise the blinds so the light can stream through
The ghosts hunt for anchors to cling to
Despite all efforts it all stays the same
Another cycle, a dance so ingrained

Sunlight
It's all coming down
"Transcend. What are you waiting for?
God sends? Signs?" Oh, yes, just a little more

Ultimatums only foretell an end
But I can forget so we can try to mend
It's not enough for a temporary refrain
Sunlight, I could use a permanent change

Feel the heart growing despite the pain
Young soul shrug off that heavy blame
It changed, it changed...
It changed

Pick up your crown and sit by your queen,
she'll whisper to you of the mysteries of truth
and love
                   and things unseen

You tilled and toiled under many summer suns,
the times changed
     but the air always carried the rumbling of diesel engines,
     the pervasive lamentations of cows,
     the smell of rain before a storm...

But now is the time for rest in the heavens above.
     Rest, yes, rest easy.

Ninety-four years is a long time, but your legacy has just begun.
     Children, grandchildren and their little ones,
                                                                            too
     We'll trace back and see where we came from
     through you.

thank you for all you've done.

In life, few are- and fewer realize
     that they are lucky
     that they are blessed

and for us,
on a man's shoulders
much of this fortune rests

East to west
I’m pushing on
Laid to rest
Let them wait til dawn

When tomorrow calls will you rise?
I’ve felt the Earth spinning twenty-seven times and
Our time’s not much longer
Fate’s call is stronger
Than anything I’ve known

Oh, go on!
East to west
Before it's too late

And so we push on
The red sun washes us again
and again
and again
and our
Red blood’s on the ground
soaking the roots without end.

Some will dream, some will realize
Some will become what they despised and-
Our time’s not much longer
The Sirens' call is stronger
Than anything I’ve known

Am I too late?
Can you please wait?
(I need a sign...
I need more time...)

East to west
Yeah we're pushing on
Laid to rest
Let them wait til dawn

Tell me where the Spirits go
"Oh. To the underground."

I never wanted to see you cry
But I could not shield your eyes
So when the fountain dries... tell me where the Spirit goes
To the undertow?

I saw my father die
In a vision when I was a child
Somehow I knew that I'd survive... tell me where that Spirit lies
Does it take to the skies?

I saw you just last night
In our dreams we never start to fight
and oh how I miss you when the morning comes

When the morning comes, tell me where the Spirits go
To the underground? To the underground? To the underground?

Chinese boy
under the street lamp
Heavy jackets from Russia
It wasn't cold like this back home

The City is the wild
It is mad here
the laws of nature were wiped away
long ago

I sit and watch
the foreigners require control
My presence is my pay
I left you for this?

Sweet girl
Look up at the stars for me
I miss you both
It wasn't cold like this back home

What is heartbreak?
Is it the ebbing of life from a love affair,
seeping out slowly like blood from a wound?
Where does it bleed to?
Does it return to the heart it was taken from?
Is it the counter balance for all the good, all the love that we felt?
The universe's cruel means of balancing everything?
I thought I was immune to it.

Wrapped in a white towel
you bring life to my grandfather's empty home
It's been three years
but now you're gazing up into my eyes once more
A chaste kiss, a reminder
You take a shower and I go down to make breakfast.
Too many options in the cabinet
you make your agreeable executive decision
I adjust a piece of your garment
and realize, we could go back to
how we once were
before the deception and tears
But then I awake
and realize, I should believe in
second chances