I can feel your breath on my skin
I can feel your eyes on my soul
I can feel your hands turning my pages

Turning the pages of a tragic story
Spin me a lie or tell me the truth
Just say you’ll never leave
Say that you will be there to pull me through

Another liar is another night
If you spin a web for me I will gladly get stuck
I need to think that someone one wants me
Someone has me and will never let go

I want truth that I’ll know when I hear it
No hesitation and your eyes will crease in smiles
No need to hide because I will understand
No need to lie because you want this too

I want to see your soul in your eyes
I want to hear you live your life
I want to know you in more than a dream
I want to have more than possibilities
More than a maybe and a might have been

Someday you will understand
Someday I will meet you and there it will end
There it will begin and there we start

can you breathe in
can you breathe out
when everything once turned in
becomes completely turned out

can you carry on
without losing what you're worth
gaining value along the way
can you resist the urge to break

I feel like I did before the damage
Before my world was broken
Before these walls were built

Feel proud
This girl built her own tower
You made her strong enough to build her own ladder
Saved her without patronizing her with rescue

I feel as though this heart can be stitched together again
Unless all this euphoria is a joke to lure me in

All these feelings
All these thoughts
Heart is racing all the time
Hands jittery from your touch

I wait like a book for you open my pages
Every detail open to you
Can't bare to share my past with those I love
You, however, I like and I am dying to share it all with

I want you to know that I have been down
Want you to know you showed me that I could stand up

these attachments to you and your heart
they wring me out and into these thoughts
your interest feels waning and fickle
anything that amuses you seems to steal it away

every heart around you
seems to feel like competition
the best of them and the best of you
bringing out my worst

you're not really mine
my words don't hit your heart quite right
so my mouth fills blood
from biting my tongue

the thought of you is like wild fire
setting alight everything i am
the smoke of poetic inspiration lingers
the fire in my bones a constant reminder

even the ugliest things sound beautiful
when the cadence of you brings them alive
when you inspire their words from my mind
when you pull me from places hard to find

teeth in the flesh
like toes in the sand
I just never want to let you go

hand on the heart
like a key in a treasure chest
I just want to have all you are

don't run from me
don't run from me

Like a damsel in disguise, she hides within his life
Waiting for a chance, any chance to make her move
She is part of the design, a flower growing on the wall
Not for long

Something will happen, he'll seek her shoulder
Born in him, his love will take her hand
Until then

She waits like a maiden, pretty as a picture
Locked up in a promise, one that he's never even made
To love her and keep her, to choose her in the end
To have and to hold, to love above the rest
He doesn't even know

She longs for the touch of his skin, the way his warmth lingers with her
She ache for the taste of his lips, skilled and soft and tender
She yearns for his charm and his smile, she want to be his heart's target
What she doesn't see yet

He's not in the game for the love, promiscuity is his name
He wants her virtue for a trophy, like a dove in a cage without a door
He wants her just one time, something he's never had before
What will happen

They will play this song and dance, his vices taking her virtue
He will seek her out, a lamb in a den of lions
She will think it 's love, he'll let her believe
He will collect what he came for, she will be alone and broken
And now

Our damsel in disguise, she's vice herself
Another virtue stolen, another night
Her pain perpetuates it'self, a vehicle for heart break

Like magma pushing to the surface
Like tectonic plates preparing to shift

Your life is bubbling
Your heart is preparing to tear

He's suicidal and still clinging to old hands
You're a victim and reaching for his heart

He puts your dreams in a jewelry box
You wear them on your left hand

He pushes to share new life
You await to be restricted to his right hand

Your heart will quake to pieces
Making room for lava to spill

You are the only time I need Shepard's advice
Words from a man hate
Helping me over one I thought I loved  

I see your face and it all hits me like a wall
The pain, the ache
Your voice and that phrase  

So one, two
I'll let you consume me
Three, four
I hear my mind closing that door
Five
You are gone from me  
Until next time  

The next time
That you speak my name
The next time
You want to me to be yours
The next time
That you let me down, again  

You are the only time I need Shepard's advice  

So one, two
I'll let you consume me
Three, four
I hear my mind closing that door
Five You are gone from me
You're just gone  

You're just
A boy who thinks he knows what a man is
You're just
A mind too small for that big heart of yours
You're just
Makin' trouble with mine  

You are the only time I need Shepard's advice  

One, two, three, four, five

stardust and choas
our cups are so full of where we come from
so bright and vast
so destructive and breathing of adventure

expanding collapsing
our own mini histories repeating and refining
until we create something
something bright enough to revolve around

So cold outside, I can see my breath
Hear the rain shatter against the ground
Under my footsteps, a white and muffled sound

Perfect weather for thinking
Perfect weather for promises
Perfect weather for memories

It all will fade away
Like icicles, it all will break
It all will melt away

Nothing ever stays
No he could never stay
No one has ever stayed
It all will melt away

All but these memories and fears
All but these wounds and these tears
They always stay
No they never fade

So why don't you come around
Maybe tomorrow though I pray for today
Show up in my life instead of just in my dreams

It all will fade away
Like icicles, it all will break
It all will melt away

Nothing ever stays
No these dreams can never stay
No he could never stay
It all will melt away

Except for the way I know your love must feel
I know that you have to be real
As you help me breathe, as you help me see
As you lift me off of my feet

So maybe the snow will stay
If it melts the sun can guide my way
You can stay, I always knew that you could
Always knew that you would

One wolf to another
I crave fear, I live on it
Decisions are made based on it
If I can't feel the rush of anxiety
Then I can't feel anything at all

Fear is like the catalyst to it all
It's like the prism
Through which I can respond to
The many lights of the world

Nothing is scarier than you
If you mean all that you say
I'm already feeling the symptoms of fear
How can I not?

How is a candle to react
When it's whole life has been lived in darkness
When it finally sees another
The flame burns a new color
The flame burns with the same intensity

Suspicion would be natural
Caution would be instinctual
But what about jealousy
An aching so primal to ***** out
The flame from it's own wick
Just so it can share this new foreign flame

What if it feels like if I were to execute myself
To be alive in this new thing
That as soon as I saw all that I am
Once I saw my demons rush at me
No longer held back be a soul on fire
You would either rush me along side them
Perhaps you would just run away
Maybe I'd even run

More than anything
This wolf in front of you
Emaciated and caught in traps too many to count
Is terrified to the point of psychosis
That she will bite
That she will wound fatally

It's the lack of everything that fuels her
What if one less leak makes the water rush in faster
What if the insanity of loneness
Is a cake walk compared to the hot mess that you inspire

Yellow lights
Hesitation in my steps
I know the unseen
It's the tangible that perplexes

Red carpets
Unexpected pedestals rising beneath me
Appreciation long overdue
Inspired wonder

Dusted in magic
Track it in this home
***** the floor with your foot steps
Leave you finger prints on these walls

Nothing like where I am
No worries to taunt me
Clouds to catch me
This one in a million life

I will take more than just your heart
More than just your heart is bleeding
More than just your soul is missing
I will have taken it all from you

I will drain you
I will drain you
I will make you gone

I will use you to fuel the fire of my sin
Sacrifice you like Messiah for I what I breed within
No matter how much death flows atop this alter
None can ever be enough

Thought I was different, thought I was just like the rest
Thought I was wiser, thought I was foolish like the rest
Thought I was something else, thought I was never who I was
Never could I be who I am
Had to be who you are

Too soon you will be what I am
A literal canvas of what lies hidden in my mind
Bare of the skin that protects you from the evil of this world
Blinded by a fire willing to set you alive
Lacerated with the sword meant to protect you

Pain taunts at me with tantric abandon
As the seams of my mind burst apart
The sight of you is the sight of me and I am ashamed

For the first time
the flaws are fine

I can't justify them to my likes
I can't agree with why they exist
They are part of you currently
Currently I'm wanting to be part of you

I'm going to try and fix you up
Some flaws are ment to fade
But some of them I love
More than the ones I hate

False laughter inspiring real joy to burst from your lips
Movement lacking grace but never happiness
Motivations that are selfish but beautiful
The way you can't stop

you are always welcome to come find me
not that, to you, I ever was lost
even if you tried to hide
I know just where you reside

I'd knock on the door of my ribcage
from the shelter of my heart you would shout back
"I've gone away, but not astray.
I'm just learning to fight the day."