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5.7k · Jul 2013
Fast World
Cassie Jul 2013
Fast World
Fast food
Fast cars
Fast girls
Fast world

Fast paced
Shoes laced
Heightened heart rate
Don't be late

Sweat beading your being
Aren't you tired?
Your soul's taking a beating
Tweeting instead of reading
Face booking instead of looking up
Have you forgotten how to breathe?
Involuntary actions* now include refreshing your news feed

The best years of our lives wasted on the internet
Reblogging pictures that reflect our interests
Hoping the next follower is our next best friend
What happened to human interaction?
We're all connected by a single thread
Let's take a stand and realize this now instead of on our death beds

Look up
Look out
Look in
Lose doubts
Lose sin
Lose shame
Open your eyes
Forget the game

*autonomic functions
I read this at my school's poetry slam. I have horrible stage fright and closed minded peers to appease. I'm happy I actually went through with it.
Continue reading...
2.4k · Sep 2013
disgusting
Cassie Sep 2013
disgusting
i truly disgust myself
you love me more than i deserve
i left your *** for a pretty boy who promised to marry me and take care of me from the moment we met
and you begged for me back
your lips touched mine only hours after he kissed me goodbye
and i still cringed when ours finally met
you can guilt me into anything
i couldn't leave you bleeding on the pavement
tears cascading down your face
I never knew you cared so much
i told you this and it just made you cry harder
but still i long for lust
i used to feel so much passion towards you
if you left me, i surely would have taken my own life
but now, numbness tingles dully through my body
i go through the motions in the hope that you wont notice
i no longer feel the way that made life worth living
i miss knowing that there is nobody better than you
now i spend every day debating whether i should stay
something doesn't feel right
but you love me far too much
and i know you'll take good care of me
so long as you neglect that i truly am disgusting
Continue reading...
2.0k · Nov 2013
Untitled
Cassie Nov 2013
Untitled
i want you in every way
internally
with a movment of hips
externally
strokes from fingertips
spiritually
our bodies but mere shells
enompassing souls that tap on chest cavities
i mistook it for my heart fluttering
i don't believe in love at first sight
but it was something
i fear it was
old souls reconnecting
Continue reading...
1.9k · Jul 2013
Is There Anybody Out There?
Cassie Jul 2013
Is There Anybody Out There?
nobody gives a ****
about poetry
or books
charles bukowski
or siddhartha
nobody gives a ****
about the universe
or extra terrestrials
carl sagan
or that we are stardust
nobody gives a ****
about Led Zeppelin
or Pink Floyd
Joni Mitchell
or Nirvana
nobody gives a ****
except for me
So it seems. I know this can't be true. I know you exist.
Continue reading...
1.5k · Oct 2018
grades, weight, anything that can be quantitatively measured
Cassie Oct 2018
grades, weight, anything that can be quantitatively measured
the number you wanted
you got it
so just smile and be thankful

finally, happiness after all of that truly unnecessary amount of stress.

and for what?

a step closer to perfection?

that's a painful journey with no destination

you thought this would sustain your happiness for longer than a breath
but after that sigh of relief you find yourself striving even harder still
towards

more or less
Continue reading...
1.3k · Jul 2018
Untitled
Cassie Jul 2018
Untitled
I guess
To be honest
I'm a little bit broken
And I don't feel like home
But maybe, if I make it warm enough
And I build up my four walls strong enough
I may be
Continue reading...
1.3k · Jul 2013
You Were Never Really a Gentleman in the First Place (7 words)
Cassie Jul 2013
You Were Never Really a Gentleman in the First Place (7 words)
common courtesy
lost beneath
freshly disheveled sheets
Continue reading...
1.1k · Jul 2013
You Rivaled Mary Jane, Babe
Cassie Jul 2013
You Rivaled Mary Jane, Babe
i like you a lot
like maybe more than mary jane..
and she's my main
***** because when I'm with her
I can't remember the definition of the word ******
but I'm nervous for this fervor you stir in me
when i laugh with you i don't need ****
and that's crazy coming from
miss wake and bake
lunch break light up
dinner doobie
and don't forget the late night blunt ride
but you make me feel so high
my cheeks hurt and my stomach bursts
with butterflies sometimes i forget to eat
because I'm too busy staring into your baby blue eyes
my heart dances in my chest even worse than when i have anxiety
but it's different
i gave you my heart on a silver platter
but pulled it away the second i had a hint you may not deserve it
and that made both of us feel worse than
when your **** shattered
wish we still talked and i handled things differently. oh well.
Continue reading...
1.1k · Aug 2013
shade
Cassie Aug 2013
shade
when we first met i pinched myself daily
i had not yet mastered lucid dreaming
but reality was just too unbelieveable
i'd left the mossy rock's shade in exchange for a view of the lake
fearing my skin would bake i retreated
my biggest mistake
i could not find my way back to the dark path
so i sat in a field and let the sun beat my back
brown to black, speckling white as i peeled
uneven, unhappy, unmatched
the shade had never truly hurt me in the past
i became drawn by the unknown, by physical attraction
though i may once again find my rock, the contentment i felt with it once is apt to end
the lake whispers my name but i know it just wants to drown me in its depths
Continue reading...
1.1k · Sep 2013
vapid
Cassie Sep 2013
vapid
i smile too hard in social situations
to make up for the fact that i've sorted through my every thought and can't find anything of interest to say
and i blush at every compliment i receive
because i'm too embarrassed to disagree
you see
I'm kind of vapid
but it's only because I can't control the voice inside my head
I'm not crazy, unfortunately
I'm just overly self aware
and i want you to know that we are stardust
but you're only interested in superstars
and I'm only interested in companionship
so I'll entertain you with magic tricks
I want friends
**** their ***
but women judge me too harshly
and men don't judge me on the right things
they like my mind, but abuse my body
i only care for souls
for records
and old pictures of kids in bulky glasses
neon bellbottoms and
flower power wallpaper
plastering the walls of an alternate universe
where i may blossom and open up
like a flower in the rain
last line is from one of my favorites by bukowski. i wasn't expecting to use it but it seemed to tie everything up nicely.
Continue reading...
910 · Jan 2014
Untitled
Cassie Jan 2014
Untitled
behind closed doors
i sit in nothing
but a pair of headphones
inhale magic smoke from my crystal
let her caress my lungs for
seven seconds before i
exhale her out the window
a shadow of what she once was
giving her life for my happiness
inevitably iridescent
i tiptoe to my bed and submerse myself beneath covers
letting the bass control the rhythm of my heart
because for once somethings giving it a start
i couldn't care any less if it killed me
i'm makeupless
void of vision
or senses in every sense of the word
i'm breathless and sleepless
i crave sweet release
but can't even form a thesis
Continue reading...
906 · Aug 2013
striped sweater
Cassie Aug 2013
striped sweater
i can't see **** when my fat black glasses slide down my
pale freckle kissed nose so i
squint my little blue eyes
the gold glows and i let one side of my face go
it rushes into a smile
arms wrapped around me
I'm whole
I know I'm what your future holds
and that holds me back from enjoying
who i am
what makes me tick
it's all so "dangerous"
has staying away from hallucinogens and the like
been my decision or my compliance with my
striped sweater
because the best time to wear you is all the time
wound up in you now i feel i'm in a bind
you hang past my exceptionally large ******* imitating folds of fat
burned off with a cool breath of menthol
by ****** fingers the flame lit
maybe i want to be seen
in your eyes
that is sin
i want someone to
illuminate me
because you're rubbing the color off of my wings
unknowingly
my tips singed
and I'd hate to tell you you're grasping too tightly
but I'd probably fly towards the light anyway, right?
I suppose I'll find solace in tapping at my case of preserved butterfly remains
laying on the bare hardwood floor in my baggy striped sweater, knees pulled close
Continue reading...
905 · Sep 2018
here and hypothetical
Cassie Sep 2018
here and hypothetical
I could have wasted the majority of my life
Wasting mine
Risking mine
To make sure you were fine
Until I popped out our kid
(I am so sorry to be so ******, they would have been made from love, but maybe just a little too much desperation on our parts to not be alone)

I love you
But I think being apart may be for the best for all of us

Here and hypothetical
Continue reading...
861 · Jul 2014
i hope the carnival comes again soon
Cassie Jul 2014
i hope the carnival comes again soon
a connotation of infinity had my head spinning
and I knew that I never wanted to step off of this molasses coated carousel
because no matter how low I dipped I was still dizzy and high, if not a little naive
after a few spins I was disorientated to the point where I thought it would never end
but within the blink of an eye the music died and the world, I , we, slowed down
I hope the carnival comes again soon
Continue reading...
777 · Jul 2013
And You?
Cassie Jul 2013
And You?
The funny thing is that
I don't like people who like themselves too much
Though I may think you are as amazing as you do
I won't let you know
I'll poke fun
Tell you that you're attractive but you already know that
Admire you from afar
You perform for me and I clap
But, people forget to ask me how I am
What I like to do
Not even a simple "and you?"
Still, every so often, I ask how you're doing, get replies but no questions back
I would much rather hear "*******"
Continue reading...
768 · Aug 2013
purple, yellow, red and blue
Cassie Aug 2013
purple, yellow, red and blue
I wish I could believe in the God that people tell me loves me

I wish I could have believed the boy who said all of the right things

I wish I could love the boy who means these things from the very pit of his being

I wish that my selflessness as a child has not given way to greed

I wish that my naivety had not turned to cynical misgivings

I wish that all of my wishes never came true

I wish there were no truth in the statement

I am no longer content with being content

I just want to feel purple, yellow, red and blue
Continue reading...
758 · Dec 2013
Untitled
Cassie Dec 2013
Untitled
its mornings when the cold stings my nose
and the smoke fizzling off the end of my cigarette
burns my bloodshot eyes
that i can't see a thing out of because i just took my contacts out after passing out with them in that i remember
i am ******
and the world is still
just as frigid and grey as before
but it is early
and i will shut the world out in blackeness
bury myself beneath covers
and pray for blue skies once i open my eyes
but anything will be contrast against
the view of my inner eyelids
Continue reading...
747 · Jul 2013
ablaze
Cassie Jul 2013
ablaze
glazed green eyes set ablaze with the flick of a lighter
inhaling with no avail
no true difference
just a weight lifted off her back for thirty minutes
thirty one..
thirty two...
thirty three..
thirty..4:20
thank goodness an excuse
light the fuse
blast the tunes
as long as she's dazed she's got nothing to lose
perception sweet and slow as honey
Continue reading...
740 · Jul 2013
How I Wish for Our Nonexistence
Cassie Jul 2013
How I Wish for Our Nonexistence
I thought I was happy and in love
That "us" would always mean, us Until you led me to question
What is love?
What is happiness?
And for months now I have been unable to decipher my mood
Within me lies the answer, well hidden
I'd say within my cold, black heart
But is it really dank and dark?
Surely flowers and sunbeams can't be bursting from my ribs
I feel no clawing from within the walls of my chest cavity
Is anyone home?
I have my doubts
The only clue is
It's beating keeps me up at night
If only it were methodical
It races until I catch it, take a few deep breaths
Sometimes it subsides
More often I wash my face with salt water
It licks my hide like a moon starved tide
I let it creep down my cheeks onto my lips
Until I'm dry and can dream about his fingertips
And not those of the person who loves me unconditionally
Then and only then do I feel true happiness
In our alternate reality
How I wish for our nonexistence
Continue reading...
711 · May 2019
Untitled
Cassie May 2019
Untitled
I'm stronger than you think, you know.

I will bloom despite the snow.
Continue reading...
677 · Jul 2013
Game
Cassie Jul 2013
Game
Purely physical
Medicating residual movements
We were both good actors
Mirroring each other's actions
But now theres nothing that can sooth it
This lack of game
of chase
Cat and mouse
Mouse and cat
Chit chat
I cant bead around the bush
Your hand on my abdomen again
I want you to push
Collect your energy
Shoot it into me
Through your tongue and fingertips
I can't forget your lips
Lightly dragging across my collarbone and up my neck
Your tongue in my ear
I can still feel your breath
Digits imprinting hips
My fingers tracing the braille of your spine
It reads "maybe I'll call you later but I'll never call you mine"
Continue reading...
672 · Sep 2013
loose tooth
Cassie Sep 2013
loose tooth
i keep dreaming that
my bottom left tooth is pulsating with pain
hanging by a string
and i can't decide whether to tear it out myself
see a professional
or leave it alone in the hopes that it will mend itself
i cry and i play, imagining the space it will leave
how unlike myself I'll be if i let it go
replacements are hard to come by
but i can only imagine the relief I'll feel once it's gone no matter how much i bleed
i can't tell my lover these things
i carelessly told him the meaning behind lost teeth in dreams
Continue reading...
667 · Dec 2013
human
Cassie Dec 2013
human
i am god
i am the devil
i am the angel
and the demon
i am found
i am lost
i am positive
and i am unsure
i am sane
i am psychotic
i am normal
and i am insane
i am both all and none of these things
at any given moment all i can gaurentee is that
i am human
Continue reading...
659 · Jul 2013
I Need to Need You
Cassie Jul 2013
I Need to Need You
I wish I still believed that you were the best
I wish that we still walked to the elementary school playground
Where we would lay tongue in mouth for hours or
Make our way past the brook in the woods
Strip off our sticky clothes on top of your Marlboro sleeping bag
And become one beneath the canopy of green leaves
Red elbows and knees, flushed cheeks
You'd light my cigarette after and we'd sit by the stream
I wish that we would walk out from those woods
And see a little chipmunk
He would put his two paws on my hands, **** his head and look into my eyes
He'd bite you when you tried, mountain man
And I'd laugh my *** off again
I wish that you would walk me to school every day you had off
And make the other girls jealous
When you'd kiss me goodbye and say "I love you. See you after."
I wish that I felt the way I did for you towards then, now
I want all of these things, just no longer from you
I had zero warning before this change in view
It disgusts me
I need to need you
Otherwise
Who the hell am I?
Continue reading...
659 · Aug 2013
parted lips
Cassie Aug 2013
parted lips
Parted lips
Few more hits
Fingertips
Total bliss
Take a rip
Do not slip
Chill don't trip
Pull out my kit
This is it
Make it fit
Prepare for flight
Where's my light
Fly my kite
Without strife
Live your life
Forget what's right
Let go
Do not know
Take it slow
Don't take it's ****
Room of smoke
Without hope
Just smiles
An good vibes
For miles
And good tries
So hi
Hello
Let go
Goodbye
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
89 10
Just in case
Self invasive
Not abrasive
Letting go of strain
Light it up and keep us sane
Continue reading...
643 · Aug 2018
half 'n half makes it bearable
Cassie Aug 2018
half 'n half makes it bearable
some nights I want to die
some nights I'm thankful I didn't
either way,
I'm tired.
Continue reading...
631 · Jul 2013
Untitled
Cassie Jul 2013
Untitled
He's okay
She's okay
They're okay
But I am not
People live their lives and I am ******* in mistakes
From their minds I've been erased
While they plague both my waking and sleeping thoughts
They continue to kiss as before
I do the same
Just with total lack of feeling
My love can't tell the difference
I am a hopeless romantic
As in when things are actually working out
I have to wreck it
In life, there is no perfection
And I have no patience for less
Continue reading...
589 · Aug 2013
summer haze
Cassie Aug 2013
summer haze
Chill days
Late nights
The summer haze
The midnight lights
Good times
More to come
Memories like vines
Link together to form a story that is never done
One season ends
The next begins
Make new friends
Make decisions on a whim
Don't be tied back
By what is set in stone
Move past
Move out of home
What day does summer really end
Or is it just a state of mind
Ask any kid and it's subjective
The day he or she is put back on the assembly line
I hope to keep the mindset
Of relax but be productive
Continue reading...
584 · Oct 2018
your friendly neighborhood ghost
Cassie Oct 2018
your friendly neighborhood ghost
I hate being like this

I don't want my people to feel neglected, ever
But I don't always have the energy, the right amount of sanity, to be there for both them and myself
Without driving myself borderline crazy, without running myself into the ground
So I can't decide whether or not
To slip quietly out of their lives
For both their sake and mine
Because I don't want to be undependable, they deserve more
But when I try to be there for them and myself, I just can't seem to help but drive myself into the floor

I hope they understand my absence is in no way their fault
Continue reading...
578 · Oct 2021
Untitled
Cassie Oct 2021
Untitled
There's a special place in my heart for people like you

The one that makes me not trust genuinely nice people

The one that makes me feel like I will never be good enough

The one that makes me feel undeserving of love
Continue reading...
545 · Jul 2013
Still
Cassie Jul 2013
Still
I find it quite upsetting that after everything, it's still those bloodshot, blazing blue eyes that I dream of.
I thought I'd had enough.
Stomach settled, I believed I had purged you from my system.
No more of your virus plaguing my cells but only time tells what carnal desire craves.
It wants what it can't have.
I always like a challenge but they leave me stuck in quicksand.
The more i struggle to hold on the deeper I pull myself in.
I choke on the grains you force down my throat, grime licking my skin.
Eyes peppered with granules I smile and choke.
We stare into the black pits of each other's pupils.
You offer me a hand.
There's hope.
I'm hopeless.
Continue reading...
527 · Sep 2013
Untitled
Cassie Sep 2013
Untitled
hedonism has lead me to want nothing but
more
just this once turns into
anytime, anywhere
happiness is relative
sadness is unfathomable
because there is always a fix
always a high
sorry I've been acting so low
I preach that not all who wander are lost
but i happen to be
to live a life dependent on selfish highs
or regret every decision I don't make
Continue reading...
507 · Jul 2013
But Did it Come from the Heart?
Cassie Jul 2013
But Did it Come from the Heart?
I'm hungry for what lies between your ears
Within your skull
But I know you won't tell me what's been blossoming behind your eyelids
For everything you see, a thesaurus unfolds
You won't let me thumb the pages
Your dialect reflects your well read imagination
Is there passion?
Or was this just a class?
A grade?
A presentation?
You might have me fooled
Hearing you recite your carefully crafted words
Sends me good vibrations
I hope you were serious about wanting to be a master of English education
end rhyming horribly but is there always passion behind poetry? or can we be fed *******?
Continue reading...
504 · Jun 2019
Untitled
Cassie Jun 2019
Untitled
I can't write when I want to
Only when I need to
Continue reading...
490 · Aug 2013
won't you eat me, too?
Cassie Aug 2013
won't you eat me, too?
it's too bad my love is cannibalistic
i must have you all to myself
please, leave the brains too
i want to stain them with my star flecked essence
so you can't breathe without me
it's only fair
it's how i've felt since the moment we met
i want to devour the thoughts i sow in your brain
i want to hear poetry pour from your soul
i won't judge
mine's ******
i want clarified, detailed honesty
crystal ***** no longer captivate me
i want your lips on my bowl
words straight from within without filter
i want only what i give
eat me
i used to write so dark. tapping in. tapping out.
Continue reading...
490 · Jul 2013
just a pretty face
Cassie Jul 2013
just a pretty face
please stay shallow
so that i may tell myself that
you are just a pretty face
so that i may stop myself from
peering into your soul
and finding something worth my stay
Continue reading...
488 · Jun 2018
Untitled
Cassie Jun 2018
Untitled
Honey, it's too much
I love you, but it's too much
I can clean up the broken chair, cup your ****** hand in mine
But I cannot stop you from doing these things, or feeling the feelings that cause you to do this
You feel broken, you break something
And it breaks me
Every time I see or think of you, I worry
My mind is too full of worries to even think about anything but them already
Please, understand if I need to step away
If it seems cold, please know if anything, I love you too much
I'm sorry
Continue reading...
481 · Jul 2013
Untitled
Cassie Jul 2013
Untitled
I have a little brother
A complicated soul a few years below
Stubborn, competive, stone cold
His eyes burn with the intent of ******
Lips twist into an irreversible pout for the smallest of reasons
He scares me
We're both quiet
So I don't know what to say
I've never even asked him "how are you? how's your day?"
Because I would get little to no response
That's where the conversation would end
I've never been one to start them
I fear my own awkwardness
I'm sorry little brother
not really a poem. i feel like a bad person, but I'm just horribly awkward and bad at conversation in general.
Continue reading...
476 · Nov 2013
What If
Cassie Nov 2013
What If
What if it's me
What if I am the one who is ****** up
What if my ideals are intangible
What if I am the only person who is right for me
Even though I tell myself I hate myself daily
What if the loss of the spark I once felt between us
Isn't your fault but my own
What if I lost all of my feelings during an attempt to analyze them
What if every little thought that runs through my brain
Is pointless
Continue reading...
466 · Oct 2013
physical
Cassie Oct 2013
physical
you love me
in the most brutish of ways
you throw me over your shoulder
sometimes you make me pay
your hands are always on my *******
or the weight of your head is crushing my chest
i can't keep this sick feeling at bay
i never used to mind, or even notice these things
as time drips by i build up a wall not even your **** can penetrate
though you beg nearly every day
my libido is at a stalemate
things have gotten stale, mate
but i know you love me
when im puking and you ask me, "are you okay? are you awake?"
"breathe through your nose. just breathe. get some water down. take a break."
as i spew over the rare flag your friend gave to you, that he stole from the track at the race
you show me you love me
but when i ask why or how you feel
you come up with nothing
and words mean everything to me
but i suppose if you asked me the same
i'd come up with just as much
Continue reading...
458 · Oct 2014
addicted (to mice)
Cassie Oct 2014
addicted (to mice)
A habit, you see, is a hard thing to break
It's a little mouse nibbling on the hunk of swiss cheese you call your brain
No, there's not much left to ruin
But there's so much more to "enjoy" (destroy)
Little do you know that joy rides lead to ****** trails down the road
And once you do realize this
You are more hole than cheese and the only thing that makes you whole is that ******* mouse
Continue reading...
435 · Dec 2016
it's good for the heart-won't you have a taste?
Cassie Dec 2016
it's good for the heart-won't you have a taste?
my love is a box of dark chocolate and blood red wine sitting patiently for you at the table
hugged by dust and cold candlewax
when did two years pass?
Continue reading...
425 · Jun 2018
Untitled
Cassie Jun 2018
Untitled
I want to feel beautiful but
I don't want it to take
Skin and bones (but still **** and ***) to achieve it

I am heartbroken for the majority of me that used to believe my only worth in this world
Was to be a pretty thing

That my thoughts really didn't matter
My feelings, my tears, should be hidden
Beneath shame and bruises
Whatever it took, as long as it was kept inside
Rather than surface
And possibly be perceived as ugly

I am me
This is my skin
This is the stuff beneath it
****** and (maybe) ugly

But maybe,
Beneath it,
One of the most beautiful things that can be found in this world
Something to be seen beyond eyes
Something to be revered despite public disgust

And maybe, just maybe
It didn't matter whether it was pretty or not after all
Continue reading...
421 · Jul 2013
Untitled
Cassie Jul 2013
Untitled
I have found happiness in solitude
The more I love myself, the less I love you
I anxiously await your return from work
Only have my heart lurch up my throat as the world, so you perceive, spits on you
I've spent too much of my time
My money
My positive energy
Myself
On you
Only for you to realize that
Nobody will love you the way that I do
You've changed your ways
It's far too late
But I can't let go
You told me if I did we would have wasted our youth
At times I feel I already have
What do I have to lose
Continue reading...
420 · Feb 2014
For You
Cassie Feb 2014
For You
You make me want to become a better
Writer
Words no longer pertain to you
Adjectives have lost their hue
Verbs cannot capture the grace of your movements
And nouns mean nothing
My dictionary, my dear old friend, is thin
My floor, thick with the crossed out remains of its contents
The number of pages untorn compared to the number of pages on the floor equivalent to the ratio of vowels to consonants
Perhaps I jumped the gun
It is not the words who can’t compare but
Myself
You make me want to become a better
Person
Continue reading...
385 · Jan 2018
Untitled
Cassie Jan 2018
Untitled
if I let myself feel the pain
from it's edges to its pulpy-est parts
I fear I'd never be able
To put the pieces back together the way they were at the start
And I cannot decide whether this would be a blessing or a curse

Whether I would be a phoenix
Or just ashes
Continue reading...
381 · Sep 2016
untitled part 2
Cassie Sep 2016
untitled part 2
when all that would ease my stomach at the time was the knowledge that everyone was going to be okay
the only possible thing they could do to help would be to predict the future
and i could not put that weight on them, the weight of knowing that the only way to help take away the pain of their soul responsibility would be to obtain powers that do not exist

i now understand that, not being able to predict the future doesn't make it bleak, it just makes the present more valuable, so i need to be present for it
and i refuse to waste this cherished time or forget a moment of it
Continue reading...
380 · Jul 2019
the hypocrite
Cassie Jul 2019
the hypocrite
I hate how I feel so unlistened to at times
Yet sometimes I'm so focused on being listened to
That I don't listen to others
Why can't I understand others are probably doing the same thing (I can later- but in real time)
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378 · Feb 2014
highku
Cassie Feb 2014
highku
Poetry is dumb
You may never understand
Words are meaningless


(it's the syllables that count)
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361 · Aug 2015
hell is not a destination but a journey
Cassie Aug 2015
hell is not a destination but a journey
Who am I kidding
Yes, I am in love with an addict
But I am one as well
To each their own personal hell

While you poke around for needles and veins
I poke around for a sign of your love no matter how faint
And I am asking from an addict the thing he does not have
The thing he numbs himself from
Love

Love for those he felt he could have helped
Feels he should help
But forgets that first he needs to help himself

He cannot accept that hell is not a destination but a journey led by oneself
He cannot be dragged down into its depths
He may be tempted but in the end it is his legs that launch him down the boiling well

But
Who am I kidding
Yes, I am in love with an addict
But I am one as well
To each our own personal hell

As you grasp at pill packets I scratch your back skin crawling due to habits
And I feel infinite
You are letting me love you and I cannot thank you enough for it

I have accepted that hell is not a destination but a journey led by oneself
I cannot be dragged down into its depths
I may be tempted but in the end it is my legs that launch myself down the boiling well
I refuse to jump
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