I loved you

You left me to stand alone

You helped me walk when I could not

You gained my trust and then threw it away

I loved you

You were my best friend

Swore to me that you’d always be there

You loved me

Slowly we stopped talking, it went from everyday to barely ever

You assured me you’d always be there

You told me you cared

You told me you loved me

Months went by not a single hello

I was accepted into college, not even a congratulations

My phone vibrates, it’s December 28th

It’s you

You said I don’t deserve you anymore

That you helped me when I needed it

That it’s time to move on

I loved you

You were my best friend

Now how the hell do I move on

You loved me

Or was that a lie too

I spend countless nights

Tears running down my face

Why, how, what did I do

I think now

I’m better off without you

I may have loved you

But a memory is all you are now

you sit there
to the right of my eye
dancing about like giddy fool
but when i look directly at you
you disaperate
to a world unknow
then i presume reading
and back you are
dancing again
almost taunting
i know that if try to take a glance
youll be gone back to your other world
still dance you are then
couriousity gets the best
i look you are gone again
then thoughts pour in
"am i going insane"
then the peives like voice say
"you all ready are"
see speck youve made voices apear
it annoys me so but as contineu to write
but this time dance
it seems as thought you feel my anoence
then just as i was about write that you felt for me and stoped
you are back and this time more jittery that ever
now i am almost shaking with rage
i thought you were nice
but now you are not
its almost as thought you remind me of someone i know
but yet i dont your descriptsion is on the tip of my toung but then it is not
just like your jitter dance
aha now i have it
you remind me of me

there is a girl who lives inside my bones
she hibernates in my heart
she burrows beneath my ribcage
[she tears and claws to escape]

her eyes cut through me like knives
her fingers play the same two chords
my veins are her keys
[she whispers into my ear as i sleep]

she has tiny bird bones
and she keeps the salt underneath the bed
it takes longer to make the monsters leave our body
[but they always do]

she never comes when i am alone
she appears at night
she knows she isn't welcome
[she stays in hopes that i'll run back to her]

her small hands hold me down
fragile fingers lace my throat
she won't give up until she's done
until my lungs collapse




and i erupt like a solar flare




*[and i don't blame her]