I loved the way you touched me
when my eyes were closed in the sunshine
when it was quiet in the moonlight
and that made it all right

I wish it could’ve last forever
perfection when clothes were laid on the floor
and words were not the language we used.

when you saw me how you wanted me, and how I wanted you too.

but alas,
the day is rarely that bright
or illuminated like that night

so perfection
was met with a curfew
one too short for me
and you

I used to wonder why he looked back
with the last few steps
after thousands
maybe even more

but I realized at a quarter past two
I was doing the same thing
looking at you

i am relearning to dance in my kitchen
hopping to the beat
swinging and laughing
with and without friends
but often
in the sunlight

for the girl who thought
the sun would never rise again
yes

I dance for her

I scream love me
from the top of my lungs
hoping I don’t run out of breath
and you hear that little
rattle

that I myself
am unsure
what there is left to love
in these bones of mine

it’s that moment
where you look at them across the way
and know

you wouldn’t lay on the train tracks for them
god no.

you’d learn how to sing
to sit in silence
make their favourite meal
and maybe change a bike tire.

I’d wanna live.
The incredibly terrifying, soul-wrenching ordeal, of living with them. for them.

and maybe even because of them.

it’s in that moment
you see all the moments
that aren’t just the last.

I hope
i smell your cologne
and little bit of sweat from hard work

as you carry me through the last finish line

but knowing you

it’ll likely be a scramble against the blockades
yelling at me as I fall
to get up

on hands and knees

to finish one more mile

because you knew I could
push through it all
without you

She laughed
“There you are”
like I was tucked under covers or hiding around the corner
like I didn’t emerge with blood soaked hands
having fought tooth and nail

I found you she squealed
reaching out for me

and god did I drop
with nothing short of relief

Because to come back to her little laugh
and find her effortless grin

I could finally remind her
or maybe it was me
her confidence came
from that little me.