Karma is a *****.
You heard the saying so many times.
What goes around comes around.
The golden rule.
Whatever.

Karma is a *****.
But not to the people who deserve it.
The people who were the nice ones,
Who have  been suffocated;
Their payment is long overdue.
I know a lot of people, including myself,
That have struggled to be kind for so long.
They have completely possessed the person
They once were.


Lately I've been a *****.
Please forgive me.

Ive tried for so long.
And I can not deal with this anymore.
I feel the need to rebel.
Because it is something to do.

You would do it to.
And most likely have
If you have been as caged in
As I was.

I am warning you.
Stay back.

I will talk, but only because you said
That you'd do some etching for me.
Carve things out and fill in the blanks.

You'd recommend something to me.
And I am grateful, but I am only a client,
Aren't I?

Tell me the name and contact information of my new teacher,
And I will be on my way.
But I don't need a teacher. A master.
I don't need someone other than the ones I already have.
But it would be nice to learn more.

Reading words
Written painfully
And accurately.
Histories revealed
And futures
Being dreamed.
And it
All conspires
To destroy
And demolish
Your mind.

She's a wildflower
     A daisy in the chaos of the ironic forest preserve

Where they tear down trees
     For new parking lots
     Seriously.

Looking pretty among the mayhem
     Her mind

I'm thinking there's self-destruction about her
     Or she used to
    
Something I can muse too

Did I say too much?
     I'm just as broken
     tearing me inside out exploited
    
But she'd rather favor vivisections
     To rid her of her soul's infection

Her body
Her weapon
Her choice

Horizontally
Up and down
Her arms

Raised up
like she's giving up
     Or she wants me to take her shirt off
     Both are the same

She bows down to me
     reaches for my belt
     and asks me to save her

"Darling, it's your story.
Only you can save yourself.
All I can so is support you in the fight.
and remind you,
it's not done."

This mind intentionally left blank
Behind opened eyes
staring down destiny

A new page
A new mindset
promotes change
When it's looked at different

Things fall into place
It's all about intention

Fantasies manifest
form of stranger than fiction

I'm only grounded
When I'm *******

Or inflicting pain
on myself

This very moment
I'm racing my thoughts

to the borderline
of personality

In a self-destruction
contest

I don't play fair
when all I want to do

is feel more alive

than *******
or cutting ever did for you

underneath our skin
below the chemicals
and passed the atoms

we're vibrations,
a madness resonating for two

I'm slowly starting to realize
that belief
or lack thereof
is relative to our survival

It's responsible for how far we've come
and what it took to get here

Time is just as important
It can be destructive
or constructive
relative to our
self-created path

Like our handwritten story
Starting where it ends
or does yours always
end at the start?

I'm slowly starting to realize
that the world is the canvas
and we're imitating art

I feel the comfortable writhing
deep in my ***** again
I'm not sorry

This is your fault
You touched me first

Somewhere in the back of my mind
You're feeling me out

Little Miss,
Telepathic
Trespassers
will be prosecuted.

...I'll put my hands
around your neck
so softly

And choke out
the words caught
in your throat

To the tip of my tongue
     all the right things flow

To the flesh of your lips
     and all in between

resonating your body
     with stories

stranger
than
fiction

little deaths end
where they begin

can
you
feel
friction
feeling
you
up?

Just how you like
To be
shaken
and
stirred

tossed
and
over-turned

This is me unleashing
some twisted fantasy
to my little therapist
enabling me

To self-medicate with star-stuff
To "Show me what you're made of"
To "Baby, bend over and take it."

Show me the fourth wall
Let's break it.

If you were to die tomorrow,
what would you rate your life
on a scale of 1 to 10?

Have you been a true friend?
Helped the ones close to you in their time of need?
If they killed themselves tomorrow,
would you have seen it coming?

Have you helped the homeless on the streets,
that you pass on a daily basis who'd be thankful
for as little as a smile and a 'Have a good day'
and maybe a buck if you have the time to take it out,
If you really gave a **** about your fellow humans.

If you died tomorrow, could you meet up with Death,
and truly be happy with the life you lived?