I told paul that
i am convinced
everybody is conquering
the world while I am just
sitting in this town full of
old angry white people
growing smaller by the
minute. There is either a
light too bright about to
henceforth burst out or
i am just simmering down
to a low boil destined to be
only half as special as what
every boyfriend has ever
deemed me.

Paul said a lot of things about
"my own journey", terribly cliche
things about success and happiness
but one statement that struck the
right chord

Aren't you realizing the good you're doing for yourself?

Something I could understand. Yes, I realized this.
but that didn't change the fact that the good I was
doing for myself seemed so utterly boring in comparison.