And again
it is time for lies
small, careful constructs
delivered in the interest
of self-preservation
in hopes of mollification
of the claustrophobic inquiries
of dear, devoted friends

so it is once more
down the rabbit hole
escaping into a world
of misbelief
buffered in gentle,
worthless cloaks
of half-truths that provide
a deceptively soft
and comfortable place
to be silent and still
until honesty loses
some of its brutality

You come to me on the ends of thoughts
ones that have nothing to do with you
or so I so mistakenly believe
However, you were never that simple-
in looking at those dim times
the spectre of what you were then
intrudes on all the adjectives of my now
There is always something
some small, nearly senseless filament
of simile that leads back
and yet again am I tangled
breathlessly flailing through webs
of undesired reminisces
woven by the thready remainders of you

it’s back again
that quiver in the back of my mind
that sad little song of unnecessary self-pity
on an endless loop in the middle of my mind
i can’t seem to get away from it
especially around these times
when everything’s fine, just fine
thanks for asking
and i know if i could answer honestly
explain the nonsense ache that’s taking over
all over again
you wouldn’t repeat the mistake of that question
i promise, i’m never okay
it’s never as neutral as that

Someday this will end
maybe tomorrow,
a month from tomorrow,
years and years from tomorrow

When this ends
I hope it is with a stop sign
and not a slow cautious yield
I wish for last moments
like the end of a film reel
the smallest flicker after the final frame
but no grand production-
none of the grasping, reaching,
begging for more
Just an end that ends, simply.

he sipped his cigarettes
small, savoring drags
delicate but in no way effeminate
much as he sipped his whiskey
fully focused on each small intake
caressing, in his way,
the few things
he genuinely loved

she carried the kind of
personal bearing
that screamed and shouted
"Take me!"
"Pick me!"
"Look, look at me!"

sadly enough,
her bearing
carried laryngitis
and was simply
too whispered to hear

love songs
sugar tears
dried by handsome princes
traipsing merrily throught the daisies

the demon laughs
and gives the globe
another shake
as the dark sky
disintegrates around her