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 Oct 2013 Breanna Smith
Tearani C
Have you never been in love before?
I felt your breathing tremble, much like my own
You sway into a feeling you have never worn
And I wonder if you even know
What your falling under if
You know the reason you are warm
And cold
And vibrating
At a new frequency and why
After all this time you are seeing me
In all these colors you have never known
If you think I am showing you things
I have never shown
When really I’m the same I just
Lie differently in your new gaze
And I’m just a bit fuzzy in this new haze
And I wouldn't trade it
I just want to know if this is the first time you felt
The light on your skin and basked in the glow
If this is your first time in waters so warm.
I’m watching you stumble into grace
With the wide eyes of a small child
In a new space
And  it becomes clear as you draw near
That you have never loved before.
 Oct 2013 Breanna Smith
Tearani C
He picked at the edges
For days over days
Until he tore me open
And everything inside me spilled
Red in blind rage
Dripping with everything I never said.
Hid inside lines slipped under the tip
Of my fumbling pen.
Pooling in trembling fingertips
Misting eyes and dampening lips
That hadn't spoken in so long
They gushed
From the dam I broke
**** I’m broke
I’m broken, I've found my edge
Don’t you know loose ends
and nervous hands
Lead to unraveling?
You are maddening
Soak me up, or I will run down the pain
Continue traveling toward something real
Like a rain drop hurtling down toward earth
And I won’t hurt half as much as I do
When I’m near you.
 Oct 2013 Breanna Smith
Tearani C
Its been awhile I think
Sense ink dried un-smeared across
My skin , a page, or anything
To think it leaves me dismayed and I’m ashamed
To ponder what I left caged
What I don’t say and I think
I’ve become the type to leave dark things
Behind heavy drapes in my mind
Nothing escapes this mask
The task is to see the shallow echo in my eyes
And that’s
Simply more than I have right to ask
So know
I’m sorry for my silence
But it’s building violence, escalating in my
Quivering soul and
Soon enough
I’ll explode.
And I know
you will help me glue
the splinters back together
you are a soft coo
Love of mine,
A foothold
You make me hopeful
After I unwind I think
I’ll fall into the sunshine
And try on a smile.
Yesterday’s sketching repainted tomorrow’s fruit.
Madly,
Love plunging through compressed artistic desire,
Found poetry on a piece of
Old scratch paper laughing with glee
As it avoided life’s garbage pail…again.
~Just a few rambling thoughts that I threw together
laying on my back with pen and pencil in my lap
before trying to catch a little nap, watching the
ceiling fan blades go round and round and round and round and round and….
 May 2013 Breanna Smith
Tearani C
I think you said it my heart beats hard in my head the raw edges of the hole in my chest aches like fingers submerged in frozen wake. Single syllable that makes me weak in the knees . Single word that brings me to a harder place where my heart would bring me to the floor I would sob until I couldn't any more and I was lost in unrequited love locked in all my pain. My chest constricts head rolling over feelings mixed at the thought of feeling safe with my guard down with sharp syllable like that being thrown around. Did he just call me? No he didn't say..
 May 2013 Breanna Smith
Tearani C
I’m searching for my muchness,
As the mad hatter always said,
I’m looking for the lively part
Of me inside that’s dead.
Scrambling after my Integrity
That crashed against the floor
Wondering about cohesiveness
Between who I am and was before.
Bits and pieces scatter an awful kind of mess

Still that bottle of adhesive
nimble hands and held breaths
Still add up to time spent on things
You can’t fix.
They all call me their rock,
I think im more of a brick.
I say I’m a bad *****,
But they all call me a ****.
And when the ground slips and mask crumbles
When I lose my grip on my cover
And I sob like a kid, no one will love me
Like I always thought that they did.
So back to the puzzle
Hand me the crazy glue.
I need a few eons and patience
an I’ll be good as new.
Given for contingency
I’ll be as good as you.
 Apr 2013 Breanna Smith
Julia
Music encompasses
My very being.
It's not a passion,
But a lifeblood.
Stay in tune,
Be inspired.
 Apr 2013 Breanna Smith
Julia
I dreamt of the mother I hope to become
Last night, when my family was fast asleep.
She sat with her little girl,
ready to strum her guitar,
singing a soft lullaby
to keep bad dreams far away.
She kissed her daughter's head,
Whispering a soft prayer,
and closing the door.
Her husband held her in his arms,
As they danced in the soft kitchen lights,
Revealing her protruding, pregnant belly.
Another baby on the way,
Another life to bless.
 Apr 2013 Breanna Smith
Julia
If Time is leaves falling to the ground,
Or the smell of soft, spring rain,
Fetch me a chair, dear,
That I may sit before the open window,
Taking in the four seasons of my life,
Each distinctly beautiful.
Let me watch the tulips blossom
And absorb the springtime sun,
While watching myself bumble
Through childhood,
Lacking the knowledge of corruption
That I'm cursed with today.
Let me see myself fall in love for the first time,
When the summer heat beats down,
Seeing everything as delicately beautiful.
The ocean's waves
Will come and go, like the relationships
I may or may not save.
When the leaves change from red to brown,
I'll remember my children,
Business trips, and a plethora of soccer games.
My husband will romance me every night,
Recaptivating my heart,
Making me fall more and more in love.
Remind me of the happy times,
When winter's icy fingertips
Send chills down my spine.
Reopen my eyes to the stark beauty
Of not just my seasons,
But life itself.

And when it's time,
Let me pass onto my next life.
I like the idea of time being a metaphor, but am not quite sure I approve of the product...
Tell me what you think!
 Apr 2013 Breanna Smith
Julia
Flutter.
Your eyes flutter,
And you're almost asleep
My beautiful baby.
Some day soon,
Your heart will flutter
Like your innocent,
Sleepy eyes.
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