These walls are keeping our secret
But for how long...?
Because as lovers we tend to lose all control
Two shadows chasing passion
Behind a closed door
And if these walls could talk they would
say I couldn't want something more
than these moments with you
Because you will always be the one for me
And if these walls had eyes
they would see me in your arms of ecstasy
and with my every move they would see how I love you so
Within these walls
We're painting pictures
Making magic
Taking chances
Making love
And when I'm feeling weak
You give me wings to fly with
When the fire has lost its heat
You light it back up within me
When I hear no music
You play my every string
So stop the press and
Hold the news
Our secret will be kept safe between you and me
If these walls can only keep it contained.
© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

The time has come, the day is here
I am so nervous, but not out of fear
The feelings I have are so powerful
They consume my whole body and it feels wonderful

I am not confused, my mind is clear
I get to spend the rest of my life with you my dear
I fell in love right from the start
I promise we will never be apart

So take my hand, be my wife
Stay with me for the rest of my life
Will you love me, cherish me, be my best friend
Be with me every day until the end
Come with me, share with me, our lives begin together
The love I have for you will last forever
I won’t let you down, I won’t cause you pain
Cause life without you, I will go insane

Today is the day, our lives will start now
I will confess my love to you and recite every vow
There’s no better time, there’s no better place
Take my hand, there is no time to waste

Hold on, be strong, together we can do it
It is so easy to love you, there is really nothing to it
You are passionate, joyous, loving and caring
I can’t wait to begin my life with you and start sharing

So take my hand, be my wife
Stay with me for the rest of my life
Love me cherish me, be my best friend
Be with me everyday until the end
Come with me, share with me, our lives begin together
The love I have for you will last forever
I won’t let you down, I won’t cause you pain
Cause life without you, I will go insane

For you are my girl, I truly love you

Dark floats out into the silence
Crashing on the banks of Prometheus's wings
Opening a velvet-silk curtain.
To a fabric of shadowed stars
Cloudy fingers sew it clean
While invisible hands stitch pearls back in.
A ghost flits on the hallway stair
Reaching for the last shafts of sun
Tumbling off a silent dream
Blind as black with a lullaby hum
Filling the gaps in an empty line
Somewhere between dusk and dawn.

They kissed you with that mouth
Wrote books about you
Took pictures and hung them up for beer ads
For humans with high testosterone to ogle
While they ******* the top of a beer bottle
Like it will bring their fathers acceptance
Back into their eyes.
Your nine inched heels gave me whip lash
Your ½ inch eyelashes gave me heartburn
Your spit
Indigestion
Because they kissed you with that mouth.
And you still believe,

You asked for it

You still believed you were not worth getting out of the hood for
The hood
what good is the hood and the hood-rats

You ******* ***** in alleyways

All 10 of them lined up
said I might as well have the money upfront
If I'm gonna **** **** I'm getting paid for it

They bashed your head into concrete so hard.
You forgot how your mothers voice sounded like
Almost forgot how your uncles knuckles tasted like,
I don’t know your story
I don’t know your name
I don’t know you
I just know that your friend
And my friends
Last night
Came to the conclusion
That you were a ****
And you were asking for it
You asked for your head to be bashed into concrete
And hey maybe you did
Maybe you wanted something to hit you hard enough to make you forget
The hate inside
The misogyny you swallow
and wash down the drain
maybe you were there in front of 10 guys because you wanted to know what power felt like
what being wanted felt like
because you thought you were worth the money
but they didn't
because maybe that's what you asked for
because maybe your mother taught you to get high and surrender with glazed eyes
rather then take your higheels off and fight

because your laughter sounds more broken than you do
because your eyes hold remnants of your skull
because you remember the taste of your blood too keenly
because my friends, my female friends who are not evil or sexist

my male friends the protector of women
came to an agreement
you asked for it
put yourself in the position to
smell the inside of your brain
because your blood meant power
because finishing them off
meant swallowing or bleeding
and you did some of both because
maybe you chose survival
because maybe you came in kicking naked and maybe thats how you wanna go out with
another mans hands down your throat
some to aid air some
to constrict

weather you bleed or swallow you are only
emptying out

and I tried to explain that to your friend and my friends but
there is so much anger about what happend to you
and none of it is directed at the ten faceless penises.

Because you were once a chandelier of candles
And now you are a faceless light bulb hung on the moldy hotel building
Because your **** gives you free crack and
My friends have disgust on their faces
And I feel
Pity

The tangerine stained race track
spread across our **** carpet, a turn
by the wooden bed frame, a loop
near the five piece drum set.
My brother’s fingertips gripped a Hot Wheel
by its rear end, its rubber wheels
greeting the track, propelling it forward,
launching it into another plastic vehicle,
and Crash.

I nursed the toy cars through emergencies,
playing doctor to replace cracked windshields
and torn plastic bumpers, victims
of one too many collisions. It alarmed me
how easily the 1976 Mustang could lose its wheel,
sending it spinning like a dreidel while my brother grinned
with splintered teeth, feeling nothing.
The car survived the impact, but people
don’t always walk away from accidents. They can’t be raised
on jack stands and tinkered with. The operation table,
home to drivers with fluttering heartbeats,
can hum to the deafening beat of a flat-line monitor.

How can I see where I'm going
When I'm left blinded by where I've been?
I'm hiding all this pain that I'm not showing
And I won't let you in.
This shame inside is growing until,
Only my mistakes are remaining and defining me as a human being.
The past has left me so broken,
That some of these wounds may never heal.
This emptiness inside has left me with so little left to feel.
These open wounds I hide like an addict,
Wearing long sleeves concealing what remains of the high,
your love has inflicted.
You have found your way under my skin, and
I could fight this forever knowing that I will lose you if I win,
And I can't take much more of this,
But I can't seem to let it go.
Now all the words I say just,
Fall on def ears with no one there to hear silent tears,
As I'm left with only dreams of somewhere I could hide.
This love is killing me, literally destroying me inside.
Everything I've known or ever thought was real,
Seems like it's been thrown away , now how am I suppose to feel...
I've tried to show you love, but it leaves you wanting more,
And all that remains are visions of the lives we're longing for,
Knowing that we don't want the world,
just a little space to call our own.
I want to quit all this but I don't know how,
All I know to do for now, is cling to what little hope is left  in your eyes,
And pray to God that never dies,
Because so help me, that's the only thing keeping me alive.
© Ashley Rodden. All rights reserved

My hands, they quiver
My voice, it shakes
My heart, its pounding
My head, it aches
My friends, they're dead
My enemies, in power
My life, its passing
My death, next hour