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280 · Jan 2016
Boomers
Bows N' Arrows Jan 2016
I heard somber news just
Yesterday
I heard two young men had died
I called these men friends once
Upon a time
He had messaged me five days
Before
But we weren't the same people
Anymore
Strange how the faces you see
About you can dissipate and
Disappear
After every trial and tear a life
Simply ends
Without a great moment
Something vague and undefinable
Stories of how good and how caring
These guys were
And of how they will live on
Even though their smiles and
Bodies have drifted away and
Gone
Made me think of mortality
How one slid on an icy road could Change so much
Leave a baby without his father
What stays is the memory in
People's hearts they touched
But it could be tomorrow
Or any unexpected time
And I don't believe you would
Ever put their portraits or
Pictures away
Memories weren't meant to
Gather dust
Where do we go after we die?
That spark of energy that lit your
Eyes
267 · Sep 2015
Sanctuary
Bows N' Arrows Sep 2015
He's far away.
I miss his eyes
His gossamer lies and
How he listened when I cried.
I wanted to feel a
Semblance of something real
I can't care anymore for
What slipped out the door.
I dreamed we could be
Together forever
I believed
But there's not much to say except
He's far away and
Made a darkness out of day
So should I feel sad and
That **** gets really bad
I'll sleep and drink off
What I had now that
He's far away.
266 · Jul 2015
Indigo
Bows N' Arrows Jul 2015
Such grand numbers of soldiers
Marching In ashen houses:
Bitten asunder, On fire.
Gripping agony so pale
(With courage tested to no avail)
Simply lost in camaraderie
That surely contracts some vague
Displaced reaper,
(If not at you're back then at you're door)
Inquiring,
"What are you fighting for?"
Hopefully for something as great as the
Fire colored skies of my town and
For something as lovely as the girls of my town;
I carry my home wherever I go.

Divine discontent seeping from the pores
In a livid morning;
(Slowly turning, fireworks exploding)
A melted shore disappearing
Upon some drench'ed pier.
We lingered with honor and blisters,
Seagulls swoop In large groups watching
Us while we laugh.
Crept inside my tumultuous heart
And changed my mechanisms from
Sleek to sharp.
(It was like a chemical
Interacting)

Transforming experiments In
Pounding myself against coarse
Aggravated callings in my right ear-
And a tweeting bird of infinite shape in my left.
Am I naive?
I had spangled dreams centered on devotion;
Hoped to be ready to drink the poison
Through bleeding and sores;
Year to spotted year.

Slowly dragging heavy feet
Along some sinking, flooded street;
Glimpses of my face in quaint stamped windows and
Street signs squeak, pushed by a breeze.
Flashback!!!
Headed into the coal black,
Wanting to turn back!
(A buzzing hum, a swollen drum)
Bang, Bang, Bang!!!

Where do my nights go?
Rough yet supple-
Sublime and dismal.
Maybe a pill (or five)
Will help:
My medicinal soothing soap.
Whisper sun rays of hope
Through a distracted period of maladjusted
Fractured-like pieces
Cascading onward by buildings and buses;

Skyscraper mornings and light rail nights.
Then a Bang, a Fear, a Flight
Wandering and pondering...
Seemingly lost expressions
Of a fixed world, with fixed suspicions, and
Amused paranoid delusions
****** at you!
Suspended in a haste!
Desperate chase never fully acknowledged .
(Or even understood)
I'm under a hood trying to hide
Don't get weary of all the **** in sight
For in this place a
Scream or  paradise
Could be one In the same;
Convoluted via chemical surroundings.
249 · Nov 2015
Philosophy
Bows N' Arrows Nov 2015
Sleepless. Sleeve-less
Mourning in the morning
Disorderly
Blistered and faded
Oh my god
Heavy breaths shallow
From the top of my ribs
Choked by your eyes
Sublimely wrapped up in
Your sunshine
You're awake
I'm sleeping
Dreaming for synthesis in
This dreaded night
243 · May 2015
Pillow-Talk
Bows N' Arrows May 2015
I write,I write, I write!
I sing and smoke!
I sit by an ancient-like oak tree
And choke
On the thoughts In front of me.
I recklessly dabble within shameless ramblings,
Often-times taken in by the seemingly bitter, and
Bleak senselessness of it all...
Get all sunburned like a bruised peach
Under the Suns afternoon glaze,
While remaining content;
Content to be, and breathe,
But In the night I come undone, laughing and
Swaying,
Taking It all In!
Blinking mine eyes trying to remember faces
Upon faces above necks
Did I eat or wrest?
Some dementia soothed away
My exhaustion
And appetite
Vinyl-record like fun,
Images ever more expansive,
Brighter; more extreme
In thought and deed.
Journeying to edges unseen
In my mind sitting still,
But somehow racing on weary
Limbs; numb.
Do I become these thoughts?
Do they become Me?
Dim glow, soft through
A doorway, On suburban streets noticing
The lamps through the windows and curtains down
Echoes of beats and bruises;
On our way to a "get together";
The everyday
Woven through,
And inside out,
Of Infinity
233 · Nov 2015
The Union Pacific
Bows N' Arrows Nov 2015
A forrest in my eyes
Soaking in the bathtub with
My hands clasped between
My thighs
Caring little to care a lot about
All those faces I forgot
This is me
In my moment
Believing that time stood still
Once
It caressed my cheeks and danced
When I sang
It made love to my brain
And I think of this orange train
Called Union Pacific
Such a nice name
Such a nice name
230 · May 2015
Maybe
Bows N' Arrows May 2015
I'm at that stop sign where we parked that night;
flooded in melancholia...
Just don't leave me behind and out of sight because
to you...I matter.

Wasting away, drunken displays,
I say pain speaks louder than words.
Take me somewhere dim In these shades I'm sinking In.
Sin all over, again and again...

I'm sighing, off-hand,
Cursing In my head;
Scattered like shards of crystal...

**** I'm so stubborn!
**** I'm too raw!
Like what's the meaning;
The point of this all?
Cross-stitches through my mind from time to time.
(Better to be somber then smile and lie.)

Tearing at myself counting my bruises,
I'm up and down and feeling muse-less.
Its all so hazy on these days I feel crazy,
But there's always that hope of that down-played "maybe".
170 · Sep 2020
Santa Barbara (Seahorse)
Bows N' Arrows Sep 2020
You're just visiting on the weekends
suffering from lunaphilia and searching for the All-Mother (Purnavasu)
Our Lady Sorrows with the golden chord around her waist and starlet tears begins again
(Achey blue-black Kali knows it)

If I had something to nurture-
A baby being bathed in the kitchen sink and that orphan who becomes apart of the background married to the foliage-Growing ivy all around the room...
Sharp green leaves of palm trees
clinging to a semblance of security
Illuminated by drops of twisting Sun
Kaleidoscopic light spread across insular rooms

Daemonic-feathered creatures dancing on an acid lake
Marble headed and frothy bearded
Chipped-painted
Proportionate forms of fleshy architecture
Chewing gum until it looses flavor
I can’t sit here for forever
Pinning is for the crows
Dusting it off like my old memories in December
Living in a snow globe
The reflection is stained by a Thunderbirds long sleek fang

— The End —