I hate you
I hate the way you laugh
I hate the way your eyes squint when you smile
I hate your long, skeleton-like fingers
I hate your freckles that scatter across your nose and cheeks
I hate your long legs
I hate your body
I hate your messy brown hair
I hate your bruised skin
I hate your knobby knees
I hate the way you laugh
I hate your voice
I hate how you wrinkle your forehead
I hate how you lock your heart away from people
I hate how negative you are
I hate how you let people use you
I hate how you can't tell people "no"
I hate how you give in so easily
I hate how you care about people who don't give a **** about you
I hate how you love people more than they love you
I hate how you fall for lies
I hate how you care about what people think
I hate how you try so hard to please people
I hate how ditzy you can be
I hate how you can be so clueless to the outside world
I hate how you make the same mistakes over and over again
I hate how you let things get to you
I hate how you're so forgiving
I hate how you give everyone a chance
I hate how you give people second chances when they don't deserve it
I hate how you feel guilty about everything even when you've done nothing wrong
I hate how you let people take advantage of you
I hate how sad you are
I hate how you hide your feelings
I hate how you bottle everything up until you blow
I hate how you break people's hearts
I hate how you don't care
I hate how you don't have motivation to do anything
I hate how you get annoyed so easily
I hate how you're willing to do anything for people who wouldn't even lift a finger for you
I hate how you give yourself to people to fill the void inside you
I hate how your body constantly shakes because you're always nervous about something
I hate how you feel trapped
I hate how your chest gets tight when you think about how much you miss him
I hate the way you treat yourself


I hate how much I hate myself*


                                B.S.

Time heals all wounds
But I don't ever want to be
Healed from you

I want your wounds
Deep in my flesh
Your name on my breath
Your hands in my dreams
And your face in my nightmares
I'd rather be haunted by you
Than forget you
Rather live in sweet agony
Remembering trembling
And shallow breathing
Yearning and hopelessness
Home in your arms
I'd rather die a thousand times
Than forget this

Be brave, my dear.
When the world comes
crashing down,
I'll hold your hand.
You can cry on my shoulder,
I've seen far worse in this life.
I will stay strong for you,
For I would never allow
you to see the lion fear.
Life may be stained with my blood,
but not a soul will see my tears,
Nor taste the salt of my pain.

And for the first time,
I decided not to make my bed,
And let the sheets create a mountain
Instead of flattening out each crease until what I considered perfection,
Because who would see my work anyway?
And for the first time,
I let my hair fall without brushing it; I kept the hair tie in the dresser today.
I liked the stretch marks on my belly, and the laugh lines on my face. They made me feel wiser.
I smiled at the lipstick stain my two year old planted on the palm of my hand.
I did what I should have done a long time ago.
I let life in.

When all there's left is the broken pieces,
Of what you once were,
Of what you thought  you could be,
Remain
It's all you can do not to crumble
Let the rest fly away.
But if you have the strength to stand
I hope you last another day
And manage to grasp onto the hand
That believes in all you've done
In all you've achieved
And never took you for granted.
They are with you
Until you have won.

On the top of the grave stands a man.
A man who knows exactly why he's there.
He looks down into the wet soil, and sobs.
It is too much for him to bare.
Here lies yesterday, reads this tomb.
A time for you to change, a time for you to make things right.
And yet here you are, weeping over what was once your biggest opportunity.
And it was left to die.

She blew smoke from her lips,
Took a sip of her wine.
Said flatly, "put the money on the table", as he walked toward her.
And all though the cigarettes and the ***** and the *** and the money were all evident tonight,
Not a thing could make her happy.
Not a thing could make her satisfied.
For she was lost, drowning in all the material things,
Waiting for a light to come and save her.