When I close my eyes, I see yours.
The deep ocean blue pulls me in, drowning me.

I can't breathe.

Everything slowly closes in around me.
You don't seem to notice.

I try to scream

When I open my eyes and break free, you aren't there
They aren't there

I can breathe...

...but not for long

I want to believe everything that you said
I remember how it meant so much
I wish to say more to you

Your eyes playfully tug at my emotions
Your half smile lights up my senses
Your freckles dance on your face as you tease me

But it's not always there
But there's more air in between us than there has ever been
But I don't know if you love me

I love you
I need you
I want you

But I don't know if you love me.
If you need me
If you want me

And that is why I am afraid.

His jaw was carved out more beautifully and purely than when the sun illuminates the crisp edges of the milky, white clouds as it slowly fades away.

Her eyes appeared out of the darkness in utter luminosity yet with a certain level of deepness. Still, they sparkled brighter than the closest star on a clear night.

His hand was as gentle and tender as a dove, nurturing mine as he slowly caressed it.  

Her hair blew subtly in the wind. Adding a frame to the picture of her face. The ginger tints screamed as the sun touched them. With the help of the deep and steady brown, they settled down.

As he leaned in...

...As I leaned in

Our lips touched

Our lips brushed together

If this intensity doesn't define love, I'm afraid to know what does.

If this intensity doesn't define love, I'm afraid to know what does.

I cried. I tried not to, but I cried.
It was you. You are everything, but no longer could you be my everything.
You told me that you gave another girl the gift of knowing that you loved her.
You threw a knife to my heart, but there was nothing left for the knife to impale.
For, this is not the first time that you have destroyed me.
I cried. I tried not to, but I cried.
All I ever wanted was to be in love with you.
But then it was her.
She was your fire.
I was the ashes that the wind swept away with the smallest breeze.
And I'm sorry, that I thought we could be something
I'm sorry that I cried, because I should have known
Still
I cried. I tried not to, but I cried

I hid comfortably under my blanket of grief.
The sadness caressed me.
I did not want to leave the pain
The pain made me feel whole, it filled up so much of me that without it I took on more. But this was a different kind of pain... a pain I didn't know. A real pain. A feeling that I could no longer hide in my pain.
And that is how I drowned in pain.

I tried to write about something not cliche
Not political
Not emotional
Not beautiful
Not meaningful
The only thing not cliche to talk about is too confusing; I'm not sure I understand it
The only thing not cliche is me.

There is this thing I have heard of
I've tried it once but I think I wasn't careful enough with it
My mother warned me about it but I listened to this thing that was screaming at me, from my inside.
This thing didn't give the best advice
It drove me into a wall, or maybe that was me
I couldn't tell myself apart from this thing
This thing has made me so angry
I spat on the gentle flame that burned the thing into existence
A rage of fire erupted in my heart, or maybe it was the thing
Or maybe it was me
It confused me and killed off the joy that streamed through the blood of a former me
A former me; yes I remember. One that wasn't damaged. Pure, beautiful, innocent. The words that describe my very name.
But only one word describes the thing I know of.
**Love