I wake up
A scream in my throat
An echo of a dream
Tearing the seams
My sanity is waning
The darkness is fading
I come back to reality,
Is this reality?
Or have I woken in another dream?
because without you here,
That’s what I hope it is,
And I fear,
You’re really gone.
Is it possible?
Close my eyes,
I’ll dream of you, until
Until I feel your flesh brush mine
Until I’m sure that the lies
My mind
has developed are just that,
a sick fantasy,
because reality can’t be real,
without you.

Synapses are firing,
The pain is being processed,
Where has it started?
Endorphins are released,
The pain killer is searching for the source.
How silly, this system,
It cannot recognize this kind of pain,
The source is not inside,
but outside,
The source is all around me,
The pain of humanity,
and no amount of vicodin,
or endorphins,
Can stop it,
or calm it.
It is there, infinite,
Consuming me.
I am silent in this moment,
As I use all my senses to quiet the world,
I force myself back into my body.
There, I can believe, in only myself.
There, I can ignore,
The pain.