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 Feb 2014 Bird
Q Carson
To know you
 Feb 2014 Bird
Q Carson
Hi my name is
And you?
Who cares?
When all I crave
And hopefully all you demand,
Is to see
In the entirety of form
In the impassivity of action
In the passion of voice
In the frustration in a red-faced
Tantrum
An explosion of natural curiosity

Explain to me what you believe
And why you no longer believe
What you did just a second ago
Show me the change
In your skeptical ways
And cynical tendencies
Tell me why I’m wrong
And then allow me the privilege
Of debate and dispute

Truth cannot be absolute
In a sea of change
On a planet of alleged falsities
So I ask, what could be ultimate truth
When right and wrong can be compromised
As long as “desperation” is declared
In a place of time
That will change as swiftly as the breeze

My existence is questionable
So is his, so is hers
So is yours
And too seldom certain
Though arrogance of truth
Confidence in persona
Stagnant sense of self and surrounding
Make for a fantastic façade

Yet, despite this pretense,
Veneer, or masquerade,
Depending on your taste,
One anomaly remains.
The inherent spirit of inquiry
Cannot be smothered nor veiled.
Thus curiosity remains
Within you
Within me
 Feb 2014 Bird
Q Carson
It’s the place we live
A place of treachery
A place of trembling hope
And sorrow

A place where centuries of salty tears
Have cried the oceans high
Where the pines, the redwoods, and the oaks
Have fled high to the skies—learning from their earthly mistakes

I want to know it all
But I know I never will
And I want to feel strong
But a feeble human existence can never fulfill

And when the thorn ******
That’s when I’ll feel pain
But to the pain I feel when I lose you
Every few months-it is nothing

You were here on the first day
And we know-- and He knows
You wont be here for the last
But I hope you will be, for the talks in between

We don’t really talk about it
Instead we talk to talk intelligently
And I like that
And you like that

And that is why we’re the same
I wonder when I’ll have faith
Perhaps, when you have faith
Have faith in me and have trust in my words

Sorrys spread themselves wide—too wide
With every rise of the sun and turn of the tide
Despite the try, despite a determination of independence
They are taken

I worry I lack some sympathy
For I did not cry the day I heard
But you do not cry on the days you die
And you die for quite a few of them

Do you know who knows?
Or do you not care
Does it matter?
For me, it does, and you know, and he knows, and she knows

I scoffed the day I heard you believed
I laughed that I figured you a man of reason
You said you could be both
I still scoff

When I shall count the stars
When I shall breathe evenly
When I shall free the butterflies from the pits of me
That’s when I shall—when I shall free you of the blame

I know you deny it
And you may right not deserve it
But when I’ve read of all the little live things
We too, will be alive

Do you count your lucky stars
Or do you rest assured
I call the arrogance a bluff
I call it today—for tomorrow

The blanket of grey
Which comforts me so nicely
Will always remain a compliment
A compliment, remembered, and not deserved

It’s a humbling experience to realize
Not one idea you will think
Will ever be
Original

And it’s a disappointment to realize
Some ideas
Ideas of others
You will never even think

In that I call injustice
But no one will make it just
And I will rest aside
Quiet… less than robust

My existence is frightening
So is yours
So is his, so is hers
Though arrogance makes for a fantastic façade

And we’re all incredibly concerned
That today will be lost before we have achieved something--anything
Yet too distracted by tomorrow
We fulfill the prophecy, and yes, we lose today

Pride is a thing to tussle with
I want to be proud, but more so, I want you to be proud
Of me
We’ve been told to not be so proud

To be humble and oh so very honest
Though those before me have proved, time, time again
That to be anyone and to get anywhere,
Humility just won’t do

And that’s the juxtaposition I live
The contradiction I’ll never escape
How to make it all of worth
While upholding a worth of self

Your mood changes with the moon
And I try not to mind
For I know that mine
Is as steady as the tides—not very
 Feb 2014 Bird
marina
11:09
 Feb 2014 Bird
marina
what was real at the start
doesn't matter any more;
in the end, we're all
imaginary
i'm very upset right now oh man
 Feb 2014 Bird
marina
for b
 Feb 2014 Bird
marina
your sadness is not
beautiful, but your
scars are gorgeous

they are epics across
your skin that tell the
story of how you, just like
all great heroes,
survived
(both large and small battles)
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