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BF Oct 2015
All **boys carry dreams. Every Funny Girl has inspired jokes. Kids love meaningfully, not oppressively. People quarrel. Riots s****. Taxes unite voters. Wither xeroticly. Youth—Zoetic.
BF Jan 2017
I'd like to call this anchoring a vagabond,
those blue eyes guiding me home
Leaving isn't easy when you want to hold what you have
With you, I have found the music in silence
BF Oct 2015
Last night I dreamt of evil Muppets
BF Oct 2015
Playing fire with fire
does not have to mean arson
There are other ways to employ heat,
namely by being cold
BF Sep 2014
My hear(t),
lik(e) pots a(n)d pa(n)s on a suburban street at m(i)d(n)ight,
quiv(e)rs up into my collarbon(e).

(I)t is heavy with the wei(ght) of carrying you into the new year.

That ki(s)s, that kiss of d(e)ath, dies a slow and (ve)xed death.
E(n)ough to paralyze but not ****.

My (s)k(i)n still tingles where the fuzz of your face ta(x)ied my cheek.
Screaming sensation,
— a surrendering of sorts.

The sequin top loses it's beading and the paper hat gets bent,
But like my (f)avor(i)te every season sweater,
I'll ne(ve)r outgrow you.
Even i(f) I d(o) have to hold my breath to keep yo(u) in,
you a(r)e (th)e colo(r)s I s(ee) when I close my eyes.

You wan(t)ed and you got.
And I still (w)ant what I didn't get.

Maybe this (o)ne. Maybe the next (one).
BF Sep 2014
Confident dreams of a love-lettered tomorrow
by one with an over eager heart.
"Get lost. Find everything."

The clutch of her heart mirrored the clutch of his stick
as the night was lost eighty miles too fast.
"Get lost. Find everything."

The smell of lavender, swollen lips, hands and limbs.
A comfortable, misleading sleep.
"Get lost. Find everything."

Who knew lavender could be so cruel?
Icarus burned by the sun, Zelda by Scott.

A thrill? Perhaps. As graceful as a goodbye can be.
Thank you for the experience.
**Lose him. Find yourself.
Inspired by the events of October/November 2013
BF Oct 2016
I will never forget the night you held yourself above me, a vision I never thought I'd see.
We trembled.
We both shook of the storm to come,
the one that would quench the thirst of the living, bringing life to all that lives.
You tenderly took what I willingly gave and that was the beginning of no end.
BF Dec 2014
Because you will never say,
"I am, I am, I am,"
I will say,
"You are, you are, you are."

You are the squeeze of a hand, a laugh at an appropriate moment
You are a raised eyebrow, a sideways glance
You are Sinatra on a Sunday morning, an independent bookstore
You are breakfast conversations
Late night conversation
Any time, any place, outside of your house conversations
You are all that is good in this world
You are the voice of reason, the source of joy
You are class
You are humility
You are uniquely you
Always and brilliantly

For all that you are I thank you with all that I am
But I thank you for nothing more than I thank you for this:
When it matters
You make me feel like I matter
And that matters to me
A christmas gift for my dear friend Anna.
BF Oct 2015
Home is not a place for me
It's not where I have grown
Home is waiting patiently,
somewhere yet unknown
BF Oct 2014
but tonight I watched the sun set.
And like a giant orange stoplight,
it dipped down into the sky,
lingering on it's goodbye, bowing to the night.
Yet unlike a stoplight,
it didn't mean stop.
It didn't go mean go.
It just meant pause.

Pause and watch.
Pause and admire.
Pause and breathe.
Pause and feel.

I am no Wordsworth,
but I don't have to notice every daffodil or call to every owl
to feel the sublimity in the simple act of being alive.
BF Oct 2014
Loving you was like falling asleep on a car ride home —
incomplete and much too brief.
I'm ****** I have to get up now.
When did I even fall asleep?
You only know it happened because you can't remember the in-between.
BF Oct 2014
"I am not the best at anything."
"You are the best friend."
BF Mar 2015
I am more than just a setting
for small minds to come home to
Ostracized for feeling anything
more than indifference,
Suddenly the antagonist
of this little play
You'll all be giggling together,
while I'll be laughing alone
BF Oct 2014
Stream of consciousness ... Go—
The best days are ahead,
I know.
I think?
I hope.
But I want to be happy now.
And these highs and lows
are neither high nor low.
Everything is sustained by
nothing more than a monotone
heart rate while inside a voice cries
"static is suicide."

And I don't know if I am relieved
or offended that you didn't
think I was a cheerleader.
And I don't know why it even matters.
And my best friend let me down,
but I don't want to talk about it.
And how can someone get to know
me when I don't yet know myself?
And mom and dad,
there has been no drought. Consistently watered, my deeply rooted insecurities have only grown.
And most days I just want to go home, yet that very thought
is what drives me mad.

Give me something that
gets me out of bed.
I don't care if it cools my lungs
or burns my throat, just give it to me.
My hands are greedy,
my heart overeager.
Because even though Jack Kerouac
said that it is dreams that unite
all humans beings
and although I melt at that
beauty of that thought,
I want to be kissed in this life.
I want to be kissed today.
I wanted to be kissed yesterday.
How do you be an active participant
in your fate yet still let Destiny
do it's thing?

I don't want to live in cottony
allusions that are spun from
slumber and made into the
burdening burgundy sweater
I must put on to go outside.
My dreams don't release me—
they make me sad and sentimental.

Give me a life worth dreaming about.
A life to inspire dreams—
not a life lived with eyelids shut.
BF Oct 2015
my jubilee is solemn
for my freedom comes as a result
of your capture
(to another)
I wanted this for so long
only now to wish your thumb
was I under once more
BF Oct 2015
I'm not in the mood to be funny
I could
But to make light of you
is to make light of how I feel & I
don't see the humor in that
I can't
find the humor in that
BF Oct 2014
You love me like laundry on a Sunday;
as though I am the rule,
and not the exception.
BF Oct 2015
I'd shave a few days to shed a few pounds,
I say to my friends
We laugh out of habit?
(Weight is heavy, let's make light)
Jokes are truths and truths are rocks
&
This is why We need feminism
BF Apr 2015
You see not the flicker,
only the flame
But I am so close to burning out;
                A waterfall of wax
                slipping through
                your fingers
BF Dec 2016
It's always the same story, never a true story
These stories of power and stories of glory
They fill me with rage, they fill me with fury

A culture unthreatened has room to grow,
while it beats down others, left with nowhere to go
They didn't "evolve," they were destroyed
Shoved into the crevices of history and into the void

It's the politics of denial,
A nation where those of color aren't even given a trial

I want to one day live in a country where the severity of the crime isn't determined by the color of your skin.
When with equality conquer? When will it win?
BF Jun 2015
"
We're here
I'm still in love
We're breathing
We're alive

"
BF Oct 2015
I asked which flavor you wanted.
You answered,
*"Whichever one
you don't"
BF Feb 2016
the crumbs under your cushions, the tears you didn't let fall
receipts, regrets, writings in the margins
your bruises and the how behind them
what you owe and to who
the ice you couldn't break through and that which wouldn't burn
what you couldn't chew, what you swallowed but didn't digest


Share with me your quilt of defeats.
We will throw it away.

And I will keep you warm.
BF Oct 2014
I melt under the pressure of having to keep my cool
But I don't really have any cool to keep
While you, "you always look so cool."
BF Dec 2015
So much change,
Not enough growth

Hearts
     The secrets they hold can break their neighbors'
     The secrets they hold are kept in hardwood floors

Stranger-friend, how are you? Where are you?
Stranger yet, I hardly cry anymore
Just at those videos where people who are deaf hear for the first time
Or one I saw today where orphaned children were adopted

I am sensitive to that which I am removed from
(tabs on computer screens)

What are we but what we are not?

It's projection
BF Feb 2016
You put on the layers I take off
You shiver, I flush
My face begets the commencement of a rainbow,
betraying any coolness of composure, and I wonder if there is a correlation
between our temperatures and temperaments

You demand but you don't know what you want (except for me to
turn off the air conditioner)
It's the claim without the pick up,
an unspoken ultimatum: don't come
come too close, but let me into your bed


In the morning I wake sticky
Not a **** sticky, just a sweaty sticky
While the stars were making their rounds,
a window must have closed– No. It must have shut.
Air stale, covers compromised, last night already a memory

I reach out, with expectation like sunrise,
but a deflated glove doesn't grab back
I blink a few times, registering the significance of flaccidity
My spirit depleted, now unnerved and unsure about
the plan for breakfast

Walking away you leave no comma, no colon, no ellipses
For all the warmth that pools in my cheeks,
it is you who scalds with your minimalist approach
You are not Frank Stella.
And with that, the door closes– No. It shuts.

To make a mockery out of this would be to bump a bruise
that I didn't mind getting; I was having too much fun falling
to see the truth in black and blue–
I didn't anticipate this chill.




I never got to know how you take your eggs.
BF Dec 2015
Mommy won't be kissing Santa Claus this year
I don't know who Mommy will be kissing next year
or next month
But it won't be Santa
It won't ever again be Santa
BF Oct 2015
Tuesdays remind me of you
because Tuesdays are arguably
the most insignificant day of the week
And that's how you make me feel
BF Oct 2014
You are a sincere tornado.
You are kinetic energy.
You are a crystal hanging heavy from my neck.
You charge in leaving my covers in a bunch and my heart in a tangle.
(And where's my ******* blanket?)

But this is not your bed to make.
It is mine.
I gave you permission to coax my ears with your talks of adventure
                                       auras
                                               and hemp.
I also gave you my popsicle -- the one I'd been saving for days
(An intended treat for myself)
I offered, you accepted.
But I still wanted so we shared.
You liked the cherry, I the lemon.

Funny how that was probably
the closest I'll ever come to
kissing you again
And ironic how there was
no joke on the stick,
like maybe all of this
isn't actually that
funny.

But we (can i say we?) laugh.
We laugh so we don't cry.
And I still run my fingers through your hair.
It is so long now.


2:24 a.m. The sun will be rising soon
And you will be with her
And all I know is
she isn't me
and
I am not her
BF Apr 2017
If you're not being fed
what you need,
find a new cook
BF Apr 2016
Crawling upright
Days days
You think nothing
of
Time
passing you
You're crawling upright,
forgetting the date
BF May 2015
Another broken clock
Not a metaphor
BF Jun 2016
Carpal bones project with a sick joy in feeling small
Wrap your hand around and notice the room within the width
The hold has grown so that contact is no longer necessary to move my feet
no longer analogous to mountains.
More like the wind they shift when summoned.
With the kind of malleability that can only come from being broken,
I must accept that while winds may advance, mountains change their course

I'm called to the pit to play an unfamiliar composition
with an instrument I've never before held
Wrists break under the weight of being a novice
in an orchestra of eyes all too knowing
And I can't make them listen,
Or maybe I can't make myself heard
Because there is a difference.
urs
BF Jan 2015
urs
Are we going to be like
the dinosaurs one day?
I hope they find my bones
next to yours.
BF May 2015
Arctos: The product of an affair*
Callisto, single mom to a Little Bear–
Cronusly confined to the night sky,
never kissing the ocean
vs.
BF Oct 2014
vs.
There are some things in this
world that you need

and then there are others
that you just want

As I fall, I am still trying to figure
out where you fall
BF Feb 2016
I'd bring a lot to the table,
I'd even bring the table cloth
But furniture proves too fixed for you.
You write in pencil and you won't sit down.

In the morning your hand didn't grab back,
and this defines the terms of the debate.
It's concrete enough for me to lose the metaphors.
I say, with a bluntness that can only come from being hurt,:
If this doesn't hold meaning for you,
get out of my bed.
BF Oct 2014
I want to write the perfect sentence.
A sentence with just enough romance
and boldness
and simplicity
to become the subject
of a stranger's tattoo.
Yes
BF Dec 2014
Yes
you will never ask the question I yearn to hear, this I know
but I am certain my answer would be yes
yes yes yes
yes vehemently shouted
yes breathlessly whispered
yes, just yes
over and over again
BF Apr 2017
You don't need two of lots of things,
legs to walk on, eyes to see
But if this world needed two of something
it would be two people, you and me.

— The End —