I’m finding great depths just beyond guarded eyes, painted in soft sighs and great pains residing just beneath your silly grin. I find all these old scars pinned down on the underside of your soft skin, I find so much of myself in you. In your pain you so urgently hide away but so desperately want the chance to express. You undress under the very same insecurities as I, you look at me wanting the same safe place we are both unsure even exists. You miss the things that felt whole in your chest, you live in your own honesty and self-sacrifice, in your own realism dyeing to be needy instead of needed if only in moderation the temptation to finally give to the pressure of harsh realities and lay instead of lift it. To fall apart within the confines of safe arms to hold you together, keep you warm and make the world stop while you lose your breath. I see you like you see me,  in tiny fragments of a mirror, I’ll make my perspective clearer, strip away my light skin and my slight frame in so many ways I can’t explain I look at you and see myself as very much the same.

I find my eyes tracing  lines
In subtle efforts to find
Exactly what moment was
Pivotal in finding our redefining
Reread rediscover.
Hover to soak in every ounce
Of something I’m not completely
Comprehending,
Listening for my echo to tell me something
About what the hell I’m meaning,
I’m spinning over the thought of it,
To finally have the chance
To whisper all my stabs
At a truth I haven’t had
and make you realize
there’s a million parts of you
worth writing over,

rereading to rediscover
Hover to soak up every ounce
Of something worth reliving,
Risking, head spinning, heart beating,
Words kissing over the kind of kissing
You leave me needing
creating that smile on your lips
Give it again I want another chance
Too look at you under scrutiny of pen

And hover reread rediscover
peel open your cover,
Let my fingers trace the page
And capture the bits of you
between the words we said
When you fumble, in the silence,
In your weakness, in how you
Look through your eyes and grin.
The bits of you, you leave
Open wide and unedited
When you decide to let me in.

You might be just a new chapter
In a life I’m excited to lead,
That’s a hell of a lot better than
A list of things
To miss and broken dreams
No pressure,
Whatever lesson this literature holds
I’m glad I held you,
I’m sure as hell am glad I read you.
Your my poems steady  build
Your words bursting at its seams
causing ink to well beneath my skin.
But the bruises you give,
I would like to get again.
So I hover, reread  to rediscover

I remember moments I thought would last forever,
Seconds that break my heart
Like it was a thousand years
I remember two days and
To much time between seldom shed tears
That feel like
The entirety of the ocean.
I’m lost to the notion that feeling what needs to be felt is like
Baiting a trap
Slapping a welt
And swallowing salt water
When the days hotter
Than the one before.
I just keep walking fast knowing feelings never last.
They didn't for him.
They didn't for her.
Couldn't say for sure that they ever where.
Then why am I here
Well if I’m honest…
I don’t really know.

I remember now how simply easy it is to fall
From a person from yourself
How hard it is to fall
From the top shelf
How lonely you find existence when persistence fails and
Falls to the chaos of inconsistency
Like shark to a baby seal
He called me baby a million times
Pushed passed my skin and made me feel
He told me maybe I was right
And that lies are candy
A man to handy with empty syllables
Thrifty and crafty tricky and snappy
With the perfect words
To make you transcends into a dream
I loved him and all his potential
How devastating to find myself wading through
All those I love you’s and
My day dreams all concave and
Receding, all the empty places where he left me needing
Something substantial
Realizing he was just a nightmare
With a pleasant beginning.
No man just monster screaming
On fire with heart torn and beating.
The best thing you ever did for me
Was say that you were leaving.

I want you to pull me in hard just to kiss me softly and linger in my space. No one else can stop my breath with a single finger hardly brushed against my face. I want the look you give when I press my lips against your cheek.. some hopeful half smile so heartbreaking and beautiful the angle you have me falling is particularly unusual. I believe you'll catch me even though I have no reason to your my life's bright New season and I have been thinking .. about your lips, this sinking... I have been thinking about the tone you take, the words you choose, and the little things that make you you. I have been thinking about how little girls make you melt and the way you hold yourself how you set yourself on fire and look with passion in your eyes. I've been thinking of things I can't put to words but I want anyway. I have been thinking you feel right.

In astrology I learned
We are all born of stardust
They die, combust and that carbon
Is the same carbon in us.
Everything belongs to everything
I think as
My fingers lightly trace
An Ink star siting
On your dark skin.
I want to fall into you
I bet you could pull me in
And set me on fire and
Bring me to life again,
Perhaps in your laugh I will find
The origin of life,
Or perhaps some sense
of purpose for mine.
My thoughts trace your star,
I catch the light in your eyes
When I’m surrounded by you
It seems perfectly right
That I be lifted set on fire
Under cover of night
So ******* high
Because we were born
Of stars
And I am so much bolder ,
So much brighter,
So much calmer
when your lights close to mine.
You turn and the star on your shoulder
Escapes under mundane every day
Fabric, not of time and space,
Of cotton
And your just the person I’m wanting
You see me noticing you
And all I can think to do
Is reach out and touch it.

I want to stay here forever
Lost in the comfort of your embrace
Face to face with something settled
And exposed,
Like the raw rock face of the Grand Canyon
I could wait an eon and never feel
This way again,
My thoughts tracing
Your dark skin,
Chin and cheek pressed
Against the rise and fall of your chest
Some strange new comfort
Found in your gentleness,
In our silence
I feel like I have encountered an old friend
Who has been gone so long
I’m unsure of how to begin.