I am a thousand words colliding
Entangled in there transcendent meaning
Lost in the tremendousness of symbolism
Creating a breathing being
With a heart beat
Within the cataclysm
On the far side of the gray scale
We are taking great complexity and placing
All of existence into a word.

I must say I am not lost in the irony
That I am
And you are
And that fate paired us together.
You have found God,
Whether your silence expresses my words
Has yet to be deciphered
Whether your transparency is providing
A plain view to the same landscape
As my transparency is foggy
Its your breathing condensing on
The thoughts racing through my mind.
Your darkness brings about my own reflection
I have only a single confession
I don’t know what a single syllable means,
I don’t know anything exactly
But I am prepared to meet myself,
If you can show me.
But I am tidbits of mashed letters
Transcending physical body
And I’m afraid your going to have
To get down to my level and
Actually say
Something.

You make me smile and look forward to days
Drag me out in into the rain and remind me there
Is a real world out there,
So I leave my haze and face it, but you animate it
In your vitality and expressions
You breath laughter and gave it
To me like something contagious,
If my life were a movie we were watching
It would be hard to tell in what frame
Exactly you became my best friend
But if we paused right now than
Maybe you would feel the intensity
Of my vast appreciation and affection
Seen in the last scene of any sappy chick flick
Where everything turns out perfect in the end,
I strive to fall in love with my life,
Tonight I realized I did. And when
I think about what’s gone right
I think of all the things you've ever said.
Your perfect I mean it seriously it’s true
I think it’s why I love Abe he amplifies
The awesome that is you,
Without a sacrifice or compromise of his,
Here it is ,
Know this, I love you both a lot
And Jessie
You've taken up a big spot in my heart,
For a wide range of things
And I don’t think that could ever change.
If you ever need a thing know I’m here
Just for you and being that,
Just being friends  is like
The best choice I have ever made,
I just want to say I ******* love you.
And i hope this brightens your day. =)

I am pulsating with all my
Life I’m living,
Smiling so hard my cheeks ache at the way,
You look at me, you look that way,
Exuberant and gushing about the feeling
Heavy in the air grasping at my uncertainty
And pulling it down leaving behind something more revealing,
A more vivid vital version of myself,
I feel so grand right now,
Every bit of me living out the beat
I don't even understand why your here or how..
but It's perfect,
your smile says it was totally worth it
Effervescently setting free these wild feelings
I couldn't feel in me.
Moving through my limbs in perfect motion,
against your breathing, into
your irrevocable smile hidden in
your perfect aura tasting of ecstasy,
come closer be next to me.
share yourself
in this moment I know your quite a bit shy but,
let me feel your freedom.
I love the way I’m feeling and the sweet words when you say them.
I happily bathe in the subtle things your pouring over me,
And my rhythm, on my skin, and I like
The way you peek over my shoulder
Its nice,
How I feel you falling and
Just keep the beat,
Just keep mouthing the lyrics
Like a poem, every single one because you know em
Nodding your head with that smile on your face
Nothing matters more than that,
Don’t let me go in this moment
Seriously please
Just dance
Like this is our only chance
With all these feelings fleeting take the leap
Take my hand find the beat,
Just dance...

If she could go back and change anything
She would gather her courage and stand
Just half an inch taller,
And sacrifice the bits of her heart you already devoured,
For the chance to maintain her self respect.
What the hell was she thinking?
Head reeling eyes blinking,
Bound like she owed you more than
The every bit of everything she already gave you,
she made you more important than herself,
She must have momentarily forgotten she’s a
Little embodiment of humanity
Lost in love and insanity,
You are less of a man than any body
You jump at the chance
To lose your empathy, drive, your capacity
To experience your life
The “opportunity” to care for nothing.
But you were nothing less
Than selfish…
Cutting it close to a monster
You always hoped she would remember
Just know you are the mistakes that still haunt her.
She talks of all the times she should have walked
And wonders if you ever really loved her.  
You made her hurt so much harder but
Honestly shes tougher
And in the dark she doesn't cry
She often smiles, it took awhile but it doesn't matter,
you will never ever touch her
shes on fire,
the kind that turns heads and breaths laughter
and chases faster than hard liquor and starts
working  quicker than all the drugs on your brain.
Lazy attempts to numb everything.
She so much better, lighter brighter and burning hotter.
Its probably a hard thing admittedly
to be the dumb-*** that didn't want her.

You unravel me pulling at all my loose ends
With that look that snatches every bit of me up
Holds me tight and stops my breathing
Leaving me with my head reeling trying to make sense of
These feelings
While light rolls off me
Much like the streetlights in the dead of night
When I’m walking right out from under
My one hundred and forty pounds of
Scar tissue ,
Heart breaks
Of tears collected,
Of pride swallowed,
Of being filled
Emptied and hallowed.
My one hundred and forty pounds of
Rubble from the walls I've torn down
And built again to stand
At an impressive summit of five foot eight,
A compacted version of all the will I make
And i'm left with only my essence
My sense of presence and a smile playing in my eyes,
Tonight
I’m all mine
I’m all yours,
I’m all open and I’m not scared.
My naked truths all laid bare
I don’t care,
If later I fall to pieces or if I fall together,
I don’t care whether this is just in this moment or
If this last forever.
I feel so perfectly together,
with my senses of self,
With the mirror and my memories
With the things you do and
The words you say in your lovely smile.
I haven’t felt this kind of way
In  far too long a while.

All your smiles and sweet words,
Feel a bit like an ice pick
In my aching chest.
But I get it your scared,
And I’m not the best you could ever do,
I hope that’s true.
Just know knowing you is an echo
Of my past and empty promises that couldn't last.
You chose wrong,
I’m not on any throne
And you've always known I stand on no pedestal,
We didn't have to be alone.
But I was worth more, than to feel
That I constantly pester you.
I don’t know whether I’m disappointed in
Myself ,
Or proud that I was so brave,
Even if you walked away
And let me drown in that moat of unworthiness
While you mutter repetitively in your untouchable tower
That “she isn't worth the risk”.
Go ahead and merge with the shadows,
I’ll think of everything and hate that I miss,
Every bit of the things that cease to exist.

You won't even let aPrincess in
After ascending those walls
in the face of great rains,
and murmuring bandaids
over old scars and fresh pains.
You coward.

You both are just standing there,
One of you captured in your own stoic silence.
Unwavering but trembling on the inside all caught up in your archaic pride.
The other sputtering words bubbling,
A tortured smile on your face,
Grinning at your own sin and your own mortality,
Like its just a joke …where no one can find a punch line
At least I don’t .
It seems steep
For the two of you to loiter so close to the edge of an abyss so deep,
Just toying with the thought
Of your metaphysical leap.
You make me question my mortality,
You make me question everything.
You breaking my heart when your smiling and I’d just love to scream.
Try harder, don’t you dare ******* leave me.
And to the other, to not be scared
There’s no way I could express
The million ways I love her,
All wrapped up and under cover of
All the complexity you left me with ingrained in me.
You made me bulletproof and weak in the knees,
And put deep in my heart a desperate need to question every bit
Of everything,
Don’t leave.
Not yet,
You silly stubborn women,
Covered in decorated scarfs and nighttime robes,
Don’t go in your clever masks,
Please please stay.
I don’t know how to feel alone.
You held me as a child and I’v grown and I know
That I would crumble into missing you.
You made me who I am today.
please stay...