the past isn't just the past
it's all I've left behind
every word and every moment
forever, painfully, engraved in my mind.
he is left in my youth,
a loved one come and gone.
I loved him is the truth
and his dark features had me drawn.
he joked and had cheats
but I spent each second
as though he'd never leave.
every second away from you
somehow feels like an hour
and every hour, now an eternity
I'd give up every eternity
for one more second with you.

The moment I saw you
Was the moment that I fell
There is nothing out there
That could ever break this spell

There is no special healing
For I have the incurable disease
Nothing could keep me from you
Not mountains, valleys, or seas.

I cannot forget the day we met
I cannot forget that feeling
That my world was turned upside down
Everything about you, so utterly appealing.

Little do you know that I,
I lose my mind over you
I lost my heart and all I stood for
When you showed up out of the blue.

You see, that day we met
I was in love with someone
But you stole my heart away
Without trying to, you won.

Every night I look up to the stars and pray
That they'll forgive me for the tears I cried that day.
And ask for the pain to be taken away.
If he saw me I wonder what he'd say...

He says he really does love me
That I am the only one he wants to see.
But in our relationship there is no honesty.
But in the end...who will I be?

your love is like the ocean
as beautiful as the sea
it beckons and it calls
always speaking to me

the tide will draw you in
it takes you to the depths
it makes you lose your footing
just as you make me lose my breath

missing you tears at my heart
it makes me long to be found
I feel alone and helpless
almost as if I'll drown

the calmness is your charm
it comforts and it soothes
the wind is your heart
fickle, rippling the water as it moves

the waters sweet, sweet noise
is like the song you wrote
every
         crashing
                         falling wave
is a single note

The day i let my smile falter
The day my tears never seemed to end
The day i felt so **** alone
The day i felt i had no friend
The day i lost my confidence
The day i finally became aware
The day i learned i am no one
The day i learned why no one cares*





                      That was the day I began hating myself.