White ink spills onto white paper.
Not the biggest of travesties
However you still know that it
Happened and you can't help but mourn
The loss of a prized possession
Even though it was completely
Useless to begin with.  But it
Doesn't matter because it was
Yours and it's been taken from you,
By your own doing, nonetheless,
But now you begin wondering
Why you used to cherish something
Of so little value to you.
Each time you tried to dip your pen
Into the ink you were forced to
Recognize that it would not help
In creating masterpieces.
Just like putting perfume on a
Flower or using a flashlight
Underneath the sun's rays, why would
You use something so trivial
In the shadow of another's
Majesty?  There's no use crying
Over it now.  Like spilled milk, it's
Gone.  Now just breathe and let it go.

I still find it strange, driving past your house
In winter, yes, but more so in the heat
Of summer...I can taste it...I can smell
The smoke from barbecues and the chicken
Nuggets we ate, chlorine staining our shirts,
The hint of rain on the wind, the heat of
The earth as our toes sunk into the ground.
I can hear lawn mowers, gears clicking as
We rode our bikes; if I listen closely,
The pounding of waves off in the distance.  
I feel the grass tickling my feet as
We lay on the ground looking up at the
Blue sky and puffy white clouds, which swiftly
Deepened into purple with dots of light,
Leaves brushing my skin as autumn approached.
I have no problem remembering these
Senses, but all I see is you and the
Sunrise reflected in your blue eyes and
The way your mouth curved when you laughed and smiled.
I see a lifetime of what was and a
Future of what could have been if you had
(If only, if only) stayed by my side.

Roll over my waves and
                                  Sail ashore.
Let the wind take you home
                                  And rest, love.
Sway in my harbor and
                                  Drop anchor.
Warm yourself on the sand,
                                  Sleep awhile.
Go on, forget your cares;
                                  You're safe, love.
Take off your boots, darling.
                                  Come to me.
Can you hear me singing?
                                  Now kiss me.
Ignore the fluid cold,
                                 That's nothing.
Aren't you tired of life?
                                  I'll free you.
Listen to my song, love.
                                  Stop breathing.

The ice on the river
Cracks and moans. Screaming, chunks
Of ice break off from the
Larger mass trying to
Hang on but still failing.
Instead they are carried
Down the river, melting
Into the ominous
Darkness of night. I feel
A piece within myself
Detach along with it,
An unnamed part that leaves
Me hollow and not quite
Whole, and not quite human.
You see, I've cried my own
River, where I cut off
Chunks of my heart and send
Them to oblivion.