some say that losing control of your life
is like having water rise around your feet.

bit by bit the flood builds
and all the stresses add to its grip
soon it’s at your ankles,
at your waist, at your neck,
then your chin, and nose,
and eyes, and then your
swimming in it, swimming
to avoid drowning but it’s
no use:

the water is pushing you up to the ceiling

and all you have left to do is say your prayers
and think your final thoughts

but that’s not what I think

all that stress,
all those expectations,
all those terrible ideas
that sneak into your head
and then can’t be forced
out

they’re not water

no,
to me
all that
transforms the air,
into something that
drowns you just as fast
if not faster than the
dreaded
water

what I mean to say is:
this is better

that rising water
that inevitability that comes with
having to face your demise in the
face

that cold water is unnecessary
because death is cold enough
already

kings can float on the water
longer than a beggar
their treasures making a life raft
(that should eventually fail)

but when air turns to water
even kings can only
drown

you're a man, that's a given,
But you're mine, that's a fact,
All my faults you've forgiven,
You don't want what i lack,
You're a guy, of that i know,
But you're my guy, thank god,
Every day our love grows,
You're my staff, and my rod.
When my eyes close, you're there,
I can smell your sweet breath,
My emotions laid bare,
I am yours until death.
You have tasted such terror,
Which no longer will occur,
When you look in the mirror,
You will see that im there.
Look beyond your male ego,
And just let yourself fall,
For i'm here, right behind you,
You no longer will crawl.
We can help one another,
See it through this one life,
You are one in a million,
And together we'll strive...

This poem is written from a Male’s perspective…trying something new.*

I wanted to Love her, but I offered my friendship instead
Couldn’t get her intelligence out my mind
**** stiff to the head at every smile and word she said
Never the aggressor, because I like my woman to take charge
But she belongs to another, therefore I remain on guard
Until she told me that she was not Loved the way she should
I wanted to offer everything I am and own
Everything that no other man could or would…
But I had to hold it in, I kept my feelings at bay
All because these are things to Her, I just could not say…
I get mad at her often, though she has no clue
I stand around and support where I can
But in the end I feel used
Because inside I am confused
We just friends, but I Love her more each growing day
But I can’t find the right words-- these are things I just cannot say…
I love to see her come and I love to watch her leave
I want to make love to her, watch her belly swell with my seed
Want to love her professionally, for I am skilled in the art of passion
But I never had a chance because I can’t bring myself to askin’
That question; no, really-- making that statement
So I keep that furnace burning low with that door closed to my basement
I’m hatin’—
Yet lovin’ how she makin’ me feel
She don’t have a clue of how she turns my mind into mush and my manhood into steel
That’s real, but I hate that her reciprocation is not
So I let my feelings build up until my temper is hot
She know she should choose me; she knows I am the better breed
And I finally figured out a way to show her that I’m what she needs
I’m not skilled with words, but I’ve found a way to relay
That she will be with me eternally, but there are no words to say…
I picked her up for a movie, because that’s what friends do
Little did she know, she was in for an epiphany or two
I took her to that movie that her man wouldn’t take her to see
I bought her popcorn and candy, all the frills on me
While she watched the movie, I watched the lights and shadows dance across her face
She does not know yet, but she will soon find I can never be replaced
I smell her fragrance wafting from her hair into the air
She just don’t know how she makes me despair, puts my heart in ill repair
She thought I was driving her home, but I told her I took the scenic route
But like I said before, she’s an intelligent one, so she soon figured it out
As we continued to venture away from the city and into the dark of the night
The usually friendly banter turned into a serious and severe verbal fight
My temper is hot, and I know she knows she want me
I took her away from the public, so she could clearly see
That I am the only one for her, and that she is my wife to be
I opened up my mouth and allowed all of my feelings to topple out
She stared at me with wide eyes, could not close her gaping mouth
I began to shout—her look of ambush was not what I wanted to see
My foot pushed harder on the accelerator, her rejection was eased as I increased speed
I decided that she was mine! I finally told her so!
She said that we could talk about it, as long as I promised to drive slow
Smart Beautiful Woman, how she uses her whims to dissuade
But I have decided that we will be together forever after this day
I finally have the gumption to look into her eyes and tell her No
That the edge of life (if she was lucky) is as far as I would go
She asked me why I was doing it as I sped into night
She measured my expression of madness, and told me she wanted no fight
I smiled…I loved every expression her face had ever formed
Even if it was scared shitless and drawn wearily forlorn
At least I knew that look was for me; it was mine in its own way
And ******* if you think I am crazy; no one can ever take that away
Because after I crashed the car, she was breathing, as was I
But the fact that she was incapacitated had a euphoric way of making me high
And the little energy I had left, I squeezed from her neck her very life
May seem wrong to you, but to me, it was quite alright
So as I sit in padded walls which matches my jacket and the light of the day
I smile when I see her, because now no one can take her away
She sits on my right side daily, but I dare say she is all mine
No one can see her but me, and **** she still is fine
All I wanted was her love, not to be pushed away
And I did it all to have her forever, because of the words I just could not say…

those who never lifted earth
lift my son's body in its sleeping

whispered prayers can't hide
the open wound in his chest

but i have hidden seeds in the boy
so when he's planted in the ground

rebellion will push up
like some crazy crimson flower