a girl with a vein
cracked and embedded with gold
a boy with a chain
with barbs and wires, 2 years old

they met on the flanks
of lost love and
agony
and so they sank
in floods of lust and
entropy

we give all we have
but what we have is corrupted with
mad and sad and
jealousy and pain and
hate and love and
oh, the list goes on

i can't escape your grasp
and you can't live without mine
you're trapped in a long dead past
and i'm in the middle of losing my mind

we are two chemicals bonding
exploding
creating,
destroying.

these worldly pleasures are far too finite
the words come and go
with the love
i thought i had

i'll be there in a minute,
but in seconds, i'll have to go
with the love
we thought we made

you could hardly taste me
without holding your breath
it was not big enough
but it was enough to see
you are as unchanging as death.

resin and whiskey
caked on your entrails
do you see any better
when you're seeing double?

i've got holes in my skin
where your fingers like to play
reality did not differ much from what you dreamt
except this time you ran away
so, go.

do you know
i am going to leave you?
i'm in love with a dying man
i'm in love lying in the sand

we were ****** from the start

this isn't going to be very pretty
but
it'll be honest,
like me.

i have done everything i can
and so have you
but nothing that we do
is ever enough.

living in a past time
just to
pass the time
are we living
or just
reminiscing?

i can't make you love me
if you don't

the words tear their way through my head
day in and day out
but when it comes to speaking them,
my brain has gone dead,
as well as my mouth

so keep yours still
while i trail after you with all the kisses
you couldn't spare
my lips cold and tired of waiting
bones frigid with care.

i hope soon you'll see
the time and love you've wasted
chasing a phantom

It's an empty dream
I'm watching from afar
It's mending my torn seams,
And tearing them far apart.

I've seen it's glow and
Endurance and soul.
Eyes closed and
Seconds away, I can feel it's gravity,
It's pull.

How can you love what you cannot see?
How can you love what you cannot touch?
How could you set me free?
But my dear, you, I cannot rush.

I avoided it for miles
Until it began to unfold
In front of me.

Your eyes begged and your lips played smiles.
Sometimes we just need someone to hold,
And you were right
In front of me.

Your eyes turn away quite too fast
And those seconds we have,
Just you and me,
Well they don't seem to last.
I can see why it's so hard to
Have some faith in me.

Your eclectic strokes
On me and some strings and keys
Make up for that lack of skin
You know.
So me and my voids and empties
Well, we fell prey to them.

We cannot
Always get
What we want.

it's just physical?
well
that's not what your eyes tell me

your mouth says one thing
but your soul says another
and i tasted you in every way
you linger on my tongue
and you're always alive
in the crevices of my mind

you're the same old song
i never cease to love
sing me your melodies and i'll
dream of you until you've gone.

it's just physical?
well you're more a part of me
than yourself
sometimes i think
we know each other
better than we know ourselves.

and that's okay.

my body twists and turns
through your obstacles
and when the tears are dried
i have forgiven you already.
your gravity tugging on me
has yet to die.

keep my head in the clouds and
i'll hold your feet on the ground
it's not just physical, baby,
it's all among us,
everywhere around

She took two hundred too many pills
And he held a gun to his temple
Their teeth were grinding
And their lungs contracting
Their hearts were racing
Almost as fast as their thoughts
And their last few seconds
Seem to drag on for days
And life bid them farewell
As they slowly drifted away.

And mom walked in with some more bad news
The house was emptier than the skin under her bruises
And she stepped through the door without moving an inch
There was her baby, crumpled on the floor

And momma fell down, down, down
And never got up again

And daddy heard her angry cries
From all the way across the world
As she was screaming and screaming
“Our baby is gone!"

Daddy would never
Feel again

Your brother grew up to be a
Famous writer
About the emptiness of dysphoria
He met the still life
And it was not soon after
He heard the bad news
That he was found on the rafters
Hanging by a noose

And little baby girl
Grew up to be a cutter
Because her older brother, sister
Couldn’t even bother
With a little girl like her.

One night she went to deep
and the sad little drops
Never stopped

Your best friends, A, B, C and D
All struggled behind you
And you outshone them
Until the darkness won

A, B, C and D struggle no more
Because they struggled with you
Until the end

And you pretty young martyr
Full of life and love
You threw it all away

You’re in tv screens now,
Newspaper cut outs.
Candles were lit all over the town
A rash of suicides broke out

But one drop will ripple the whole ocean
And tsunami waves will fall
And the drop will never know those bitter words spoken
Because they dropped it all.

He died in a puddle of blood,
Her in a puddle of tears
The next day was met by the rising sun,
And so it was, for years and years.

all my miracles have come and gone
i'm left dusting the remains
of discarded love
corpses upon corpses
of summer nights that have drifted on,
and died

it stays light much longer now,
but my eyes are still blinded by
thick fog and low clouds
i like to call them my friends, from time to time
you left me burning down
to the filter

i am ashes now
on your neatly kept shelf
of all the hearts you half-saved
and left behind too soon.

you set me alight
but never put me out
i'm nothing but ashes to you now,
darling

my bones grew used to the pressure of travel
barometers lowering, heightening,
you never came to see me after all.

because she walked in
while i stuck around
the sound of your skin against hers
is echoing around my dreams
the sound
sends me
cringing

forget i ever happened
and i will too

to be pathetically honest
i don't know if i've got
a life worth living
without you

i think i've figured something out and i never wanted to know it i
dont know what im thinking anymore
but i hope you werent a liar and that i
wasnt just a player in some stupid little game

i trusted you too easy i think and
i think my mind has gone into overdrive
doctor whats up with the meds
everyone says its just for the money
i don't want to be a manipulated little pawn
lead on
in the back seat, in your bedroom, in your bank account
i don't know where my head's at

do you promise
well your promise ain't worth **** to me
i still hate myself enough not to believe you

stop leaving me trailing and maybe
i'll start breathing again
why did everyone scatter at once like
ripples in the ocean
running away from force

i'm sick of the screaming and the coughing and the empty eyes

mom and dad had the doctor sew our third eyes shut

i hope you liked the writing
while it came
for you

i hope you liked my skin
how it crawled
for you

i never asked for attachment when
i helped you out that one time
so stupidly, i took you that one time
in the back seat of a car

i've found a few familiar trends
in the way that love dies
and to watch your lover cry
my heart is slowing, my
fingers lost their spark

there's been something trying to get me to die
from the inside
since they day i
first saw these blue skies,

it never fails to show me
the inherent dark
of night

so i can easily run away now since you've
already kept me at number two
no need to hang around now,
my young-eyed lost soul

you asked me what i saw when i looked in your eyes
and i never told you so

i see a little boy battling with age
a confused boy who has lost his page
a man who is learning to handle his rage
most of it baby, it's all just a phase.

don't you worry your pretty little head,
soon enough, we'll all be dead,
my blood your wine, my body your bread;
i'll be waiting
and painting
the marks of  your fingers left on my skin
red

remember that morning i woke up with
her touching you in my head
and i couldn't take it when you said you were leaving with
her, it wont get out of my head

i can hear glasses clinking in the kitchen
and the alcohol is wearing thin
i dont want to be here
this isn't happening

remember that morning i
stole my parents car
just for a pack of cigarettes
and it's killing me i
don't know how it went this far
i am the most tragic life i have ever met

i am on the verge of
going over the edge of
death and darkness and all those
cataclysmic things

i almost loved
born from a simple touch,
in the backseat and in your bed and all those
places and empty dreams

slow down, girl,
it isn't the end of the world
but i can't take it anymore

get a job
make a living
you need to stop
and do my bidding

stay in school
time is running out
don't be such a fool

can you hear that sound?
its the sound of me losing
at least i was smacked for the break up
but waking up...

you throw *** in the mix
and suddenly you're supposed to be all mine
i let you in, it makes me sick
because you were supposed to be all mine

i've got all the battle wounds you need to
be someone who's got issues
we were supposed to be beautiful
but you'll need me, you'll miss me, you'll
realize all the difference i made

and if you don't that's okay because
not many really do
there's the subject and here's the clause
it really had all to do with you

it happened too fast and
ended too soon
you set me free
but you left, too

The flowers here are ethereal, like you and me.

i know who i am but
no one seems to agree

help me find the
self respect and dignity to
walk away from that which
kills me

here are more words
more words than you'll
ever deserve

you make me wanna forfeit

HERE IS TO NEVER ******* GOING BACK

my bed has broken
from all the weight
on my shoulders

the sky is crying
yet no one has stopped to ask
"do you need help?"

live stream of your consciousness
at the click of a button
look at what the times have done to you, man

i am unsure of why i

have this burning desire

to let myself implode

to get completely inebriated and

take my clothes off

i am a hypocrite

and a little bit of a ****.

you have all you need,

a loving family,

a paying job

good looks, good mind

playing with a drug called

perfection

its like this high

you get a taste of

once or twice

and then you are always

reaching, reaching

to meet that sweet sufficiency again

you’ll never touch it.

but we are all stellar

down to the empty spaces

that make us whole

just not quite healthy

no, i am ill

fall in love with the moon light and

writhe the night away

when i was younger i

used to think i could control the wind

but now i know

i am the wind

you rattle my cage
and your heart has slipped
out of my grasp.

it's just a phase,
we kissed, but
it wouldn't last.

my existence is futile
with scars and
rotting stomach lining.
degeneration

i wear the finest threads
made of skin and bones
they came from the stars.
i don't remember what they told me
that night my heart stopped beating

watch the sun rise,
let us live again.
relentlessly loving you,
get out of my mind.
love is dead to me

i had a thousand words to say
but they have melted away
now
i held the blade
tighter than your hand
throw me to the waves,
bury me in the sand.