couch locked
my teeth are feeling rotted
and i’m sick of all the nothing on your face

katie tried to find a dentist
but i can’t stand the taste of metal

my gums bleed while we drink boxed wine

i want the night to stick around

so i don’t have to keep finding new sounds

that i like

i’ll just end up sleeping all day

trying to avoid the pain

it’s been almost a year

things still feel the same

i think i love you
but i’m messed up and sick
maybe i don’t know what love is
you tried to teach me
but i’m impatient
i don’t know how to listen and i talk for days
about nothing in particular
just trying to keep your gaze

irresponsibility
you are dear to me


you are why i dont mind sleeping in the back seat
of my car
in early march

the parents of indifference and anxiety
have taught
apathy
it has been instilled in me

emily doesn’t like my box of coins i bring everywhere

i dont think she likes my antics
i dont think she finds them endearing

but it has been instilled in me
irresponsibility

in july i tied flowers into crowns trying to get you to love me

in may you gave all your crowns back to me

and now ill never like the 5th of july

my teeth still shatter in my dreams

your sound is a dull empty ache

but ill still pick you handfuls of flowers

just in case you decide
im really not a waste

i’ll get sick
and lay around

make some ramen
then leave it out

get so caught up in the warmth
and wonder why i never feel it

i havent seen the sun since last weekend

i should really go out
but all this snow keeps me confined

that’s my comfort

all the things i’d do if it wasn’t so cold

if there wasn’t this much snow