phie: Poems

67 · Mar 2021

phie Mar 2021

i have experienced love in a past life of mine
but the skin on my bones has changed since then
long lost are the memories of lips on lips
the heat of another body close by
my face has aged
my hair is cut short
but alas i have grown anew

64 · Mar 2021

dogwood

phie Mar 2021

dogwood

the sticky smell of the dogwood blossoms as i drive through the streets most familiar to me
brick houses and front porches and dogs in the backyards
windows down the sun is out but the trees aren't yet green
i could close my eyes and the way would find itself to me
left right right foot on the brakes and park

54 · Nov 2020

untitled 11-2-20

phie Nov 2020

untitled 11-2-20

lavender coffee too late into the night
the caffeine makes it hard to stay seated
my mouth stuck in a grimace from the bitter taste
but i try to fight it every step of the way
a little flourish to make it sweet
but it still manages to linger

53 · Mar 2021

mirrors

phie Mar 2021

mirrors

for a long time when i looked in the mirror there was a disconnect between what i saw and what i looked like
my cheeks were pudgy and my lips were dry
i had picked apart myself until what was reflected didn't reflect myself

53 · Nov 2020

ghosting

phie Nov 2020

ghosting

my hand passes through solid matter
my feet never touch the ground
i have no reflection in the mirror
my throat can make no sound
days and years and decades fly past
standing in this same tacky house
the white walls like prison bars
stuck in a labyrinth and i am the mouse

52 · Feb 2021

?

phie Feb 2021

?

the warm orange light at the end of a long
narrow hallway beckons me
it's late and dark
with phosphorescent lights guiding the way
as you walk the end stretches backward
the hallway is never ending
i know this.
i don't turn around.
i move forward aimlessly through
the linear labyrinth

49 · Sep 2020

baby blue

phie Sep 2020

baby blue

the chill of the wind rushing through your bones
thrilling biting breaking through walls
what once was lost now lies behind the door
will you open it?

48 · Mar 2021

burned out

phie Mar 2021

burned out

you know the saying ive left claw marks on everything ive let go
well ive left no claw marks behind
somehow ive ended up empty handed,
all my pieces on your side
you asked and asked and asked
ive never been able to say no
ive dipped my toes into life and i have drowned in its sorrows
i give and give and give
ive never been able to say no

19 · Mar 2021

wishes

phie Mar 2021

wishes

when i was a child i had thought of a life much different from mine
as an adult i still long for the delusions of my dreams
it is hard to picture my future absent of some magic
some otherworldly force to make it worth the effort
when i grow even older will i still wish for more

— The End —