someone once asked her
what it was like
to hold that box of darkness
because it looked heavy
cracked and old
locked up tight
she'd just smile and
shake her head
because that secret was hers
and hers alone
no one knew that what she carried
was the weight of others, their wrong doings
the secrets she promised to keep
even the ones that were slowly killing her
but she wanted more than anything
to take their pain away
because she was always pulled
to those who were broken
misguided and lost
because they reminded her
of who she used to be
and if she could help
soothe their souls
ease the broken hearted
then life would be sweeter
but sometimes it didn't make a bit of sense
and she felt the box grow heavy
colder and she started to feel empty
maybe it's time
to bury that box

if you could've traced her veins
you'd see the clarity of the pain
and how each word marked her heart
and that would be a start
of figuring exactly who
this girl was bathed in blue
and the only thing she would desire
is someone to dance in the fire
and never worry about the flame
if you love it, give it a name
otherwise let it go, let it go
so it may learn to grow
or else she'd be a wilted flower
just waiting for the minute, the hour
when she found simplicity, she was free
she knew exactly who she wanted to be
it was getting there
that always seemed to be the struggle

build it up just to burn it down
i feel trapped in this town
when there are other worlds than this
so tired of this hit and miss
be beautiful, be brave
you are not a slave
and what confines
never defines
and it will never shatter
if you make it matter
give it roots or give it wings
find your peace in pretty things
empty out the coldness of your heart
find the light shining in the dark
and know that there's more tomorrows
to sing away the pain, the sorrows
life doesn't have to be so tragic
just dance because you're made of magic

guard your heart and spill your dreams
or you'll come apart at the seams
you are a beautiful creature, spirit alive
but now you have to learn to survive
never let the world leave you cold & empty
there's darkness here and despair is plenty
but watch the stars against the night
you will find your way, you will find the light
and all that hope you've been saving up
you'll see that you were always good enough
the ground beneath you might quiver and shake
but you my love were never one to give in and break
shining like the summer sun
don't let your secrets come undone
don't let it make you bitter, frail
this is your life, your story to tell

when i left
the quiet hell i was living in
you were there
with your sweet words
that tasted like sugar on my lips
your promises
of better days
and better times
and i was so naive
a hopeless fool
because i've always believed
in the illusion of love
then you started
showing me the darkness
and it was more than i could take
when all i wanted
was to finally see the sun
let the light fill up my soul
and you laughed
because i was so blind
so believing, trusting
and you made your mark
where the scars had yet to heal
and all it left me with
was a bitter taste in my mouth

she wanted something simple & sweet
to just feel the earth beneath her feet
she wanted to find that touch of magic
because really nothing's that tragic
if you find the stories to tell
live them free and live them well
she wanted to be the change
in a world so unreal and strange
but she never knew quite where to start
to spill the secrets in her heart
sometimes the world would make her ache
but she was never meant to bend or break
she'd just push on each day
finding a reason to smile, to pray
because there's always more
if you know what you're searching for
and somedays she felt so lost, empty
mistakes and tears they were plenty
but she'd find the balance, the calm
something to hold right in her palm
and make it beautiful, some how
when she's living in the now
finding the freedom, the grace
you can see it all in her face
if you're willing to look
you could read her like a book

he says maybe i should come inside
find a place for my demons to hide
because i see rain in your skin
and you're where i should begin
to drive my darkness out
i'm so tired of fear and doubt
i want something safe and warm
find some shelter from the storm
where all my broken peaces can mend
maybe a lover or maybe a friend
it wouldn't matter
if we don't shatter
if we don't break
maybe it'll dull the ache
of yesterdays sorrows
bring on better tomorrows
i see comfort in your lips
trace your face with my fingertips
and i'll find my release
in your soul i'll find my peace
if you'll just let me in
feel the rain on your skin
and she smiles like sunshine
dancing her away across the time
if she can dull the ache, the pain
she never listens to her brain
it's the heart that leads her blindly
someday she's gonna learn

she found comfort in sea side towns
and how the waves felt beneath her
it was the closest to safe
she'd felt in forever
she wanted to take photos
of strangers and
listen to their stories
because human connection
is by far the sweetest thing we have
and she wanted to capture
that moment in time
when you could see their memories
in the lines of their face
and how their eyes would light up
when they talked about life
she wanted to see how beautiful
or how dark
others viewed the world
because it felt so important
and when their words were sad
and you could hear the pain
in their soft voices
she could feel that ache in her chest
and how she hurt so much
for the broken
for the lost
for the lonely
and god she wanted to save them all
but she knew she really couldn't
so she'd just love them
as best as she knew how
because it felt right
it made her happy
and sometimes that's all she'd have
pictures to help remember
& stories burned into her brain

she never wanted anyone
to tell her she was pretty
because it felt so empty
and unreal because she mostly
didn't feel that way
and they mostly only saw her
when she was broken and sad
don't love her like that
or you'll never know her
you'll let her go &
maybe regret it later
the girl who slipped through
like a ghost but she haunts you still
love her when she's happy
when she's doing what she loves
when she feels well and whole
or don't love her at all
because you don't know her
she doesn't need you to tell her shallow things
she has no time for that
and everything with her must have meaning
she's complicated but she has simple needs
she doesn't expect you to catch the stars
only to sit and watch them with her

she was like fire in the rain
the sweeter side of pain
a mix of adventure and danger
who never met a stranger
held her head up high
& watched the world go by
not really having a care
all her dreams were there
like a cloak that kept her warm
she was the thunder in the storm
the lightning streaked across the sky
but she wouldn't blink an eye
because there was little left to surprise
when she could see where beauty lies
and hear the sound of music in the wind
she wouldn't shatter, break or even bend
she was the embodiment of mystery
and chose to never reveal her history
sometimes pain left wounds so deep
but she wouldn't let anyone see her weep
because she was so strong
in the wild she found her song
and she sang it with a bleeding throat
would she sink or would she float
either way it wouldn't matter
to the girl who would never shatter

feels like inside out & made of glue
only seeing things in gray and blue
close my eyes but i won't sleep
the water here is so dark and deep
everything inside starts to burn
don't know if i will ever learn
feels like fresh air, sunshine
sipping on the finest wine
laughter and music, dancing too fast
either way this won't last
feels like a roller coaster, a trap
no one ever gave me the map
when i feel so lost and there's no way to go
planting seeds but nothing will grow
i busted my lip on this broken cup
don't know if i should go on or just give up
but i will struggle and i will fight
until i can find my way, my light
seek and hopefully i will find
the pretty parts of my mind

see me in the water, dark and deep
i felt your hands holding me down
why did you want me to drown
what could i possibly do
i was a baby, only two
did you snap, did you break
it was more than you could take
was it really me who was to blame
i remember screaming your name
fighting, crying, finally giving up
you were the source of all my love
there were tears in your eyes
as you tried to ignore my cries
you said, "i'm sorry, baby go to sleep"
but the water was so cold and deep
i got so tired, couldn't fight
started drifting toward the light
& i saw such pretty things
carried away with angel wings
in that moment i was ready to forgive
the mother who wouldn't let me live
there's no pain here
no confusion or fear
even though my final moments were sad
i never thought that you were bad
only broken beyond repair
and when you're sitting in that chair
waiting for death
your final breath
i hope you find peace
something to calm the beast
so maybe you can
forgive yourself

I hope you've found your peace, your laughter
in a place of no pain, the great ever after
here on earth our tears are shed
but i'm proud of the life you led
how you gave me hope, courage to be
all the things the world should see
the battle you fought was hard, struggle every day
and even though i didn't want to let you go away
it hurt me to see you suffer, and be in pain
memories wash over me, soft like rain
you will always be in my heart, now, forever
in heaven all our loved ones will gather together
they will welcome you with open arms, a smile
but sometimes it feels like we only had a little while
i'm grateful i got to say goodbye
and even when i feel like i'm going to cry
i know you've found that place
where the sun always shines on your face
and music is always in the air
someday we'll all be there
i'm so thankful for you, you taught me so many things
you're in heaven now papa, getting your wings

when I hold your little hand
i hope that you will understand
the things i want you to see
are all the things i know you can be
the sky is the limit, you can have it all
but you can't ever be afraid to fall
get knocked down and you'll get back up
and the world will always give you just enough
it's up to you to use your gifts, make your way
find yourself and all the reasons to pray
always be ready for what life has in store
and know that you are so much more
that you are made of love and light
and always give me a reason to fight
to hope for bigger and better things
you gave me life, i'll give you wings
in your eyes i see the stars, the moon
i know this time will pass so soon
these little moments fill up my heart
you were my life from the start
and i'm so thankful for this
with each hug, each kiss
i know that my life was never complete
until i had a love this sweet
and nothing makes me quite as proud
as when i hear those words out loud
of mama i love you
but i'll always love you more

tell me something soft, something sweet
we'll dance right here on the street
under the lights
all these summer nights
rolling together
is it now or forever
in this moment, we have a plan
and you tell me you understand
when the tears start to flow
and the flowers don't grow
when the cold sets in
& i'm lost in sin
when i feel like i'm lost, drifting
the world feels like it's shifting
storms are brewing, clouds turn black
i don't know if i'll find my way back
because it hurts
to not feel my worth
to feel cracked and broken
these gentle words you've spoken
that give me hope, a reason to try
wings that are broken cannot fly
but they can heal
when you accept what you feel
& know that come tomorrow
there'll be no time for sorrow
sometimes it's just a day
when we're lost & need to pray
you're there for me, to remind
that faith has been mine to find
God has never left
even when I drifted

like a moth to the flame
you are drawn to her name
because you see her sparkle, shine
the sweetest fruit on the vine
and her laughter, like a song
wish you could sing along
sometimes she's quiet, still
and you wonder what she would feel
in your world made of glass
where days are quick to pass
and nights seem never ending
so much of life was lost with pretending
but you see the way she dances
never afraid to take those chances
and how her smile is so true and bright
bringing hope to the darkest night
and they fall at her feet
the girl so innocent and sweet
her beauty so fragile, so rare
all because she chose to care
when the world gave up
she always sought love
in the darkest places
in the strangest faces
because it was a gift she had
to find the good beneath the bad
you were afraid of the dark
and all the secrets in your heart
that you lost your glow
in a world where flowers won't grow
and the nights seem so never ending
it gets tiresome always pretending
so find that sparkle, find that shine
and you can be the sweetest
fruit on the vine

when you found me
little was left of my heart
just parts pieced together
bruised and battered
and i thought you were
going to save me
but little by little
you just
chip, chip, chip
until there's barely
anything left
and it would hurt
if i could feel
but i'm empty
and your words
they burn, they sting
in those brief moments
when i can feel anything
it's the pain, the realization
that i'll never be
much of anything

I know what its like
to feel worthless
useless
ugly and stupid
i know what it's like
to be laughed at
to be hated
to feel like
i'm nothing
but i always prayed
that maybe, just maybe
someone would save me
and find beauty there
somewhere deep
hidden from the world
who sees me as hideous
bad, wrong... trash
and they would kiss
away the sadness
and tell me
i'm beautiful
but i realize
it may never happen
so i'll just take this world
day by day

never be afraid of the unknowns in life
you will find glory and you will find strife
and it may shape you but don't let it change
never let the world make you feel like you're strange
you are perfect from head to toes
how i got so lucky, God only knows
so when you're rambunctious and a little too loud
i may seem overwhelmed but remember that i'm proud
amongst the fighting, the yelling, the messing
i know my children are my greatest blessing
there would be no me without you
so remember that no matter what you do
i'll be there to guide you along
try to teach you right from wrong
hold your hand, teach you prayer
in life we should love and share
take care of each other, our family
my children bring out the best in me
i think of how much i would miss
you give me meaning in all of this
i'm sorry for days when i seem stressed
because i know i'm truly blessed
crayon art on the walls
fingerprints trailing down the halls
through laughter and tears
i'm grateful for these years
and i know without doubt that i'm the lucky one
looking into the eyes of my daughter and son

when they were young they were brave
i think of the love my parents gave
and how they tried to teach us right
to never give up without a fight
how they would work multiple jobs to make ends meet
to make sure we had clothes on backs, food to eat
and they rose above their circumstances
to make sure we always had those chances
to be everything that we could be
when you're a child you can't see
the sacrifices your parents make
how they love you after every mistake
and they want the best for you
because they know what you can do
they were young when they decided to marry
knew the world was theirs to carry
and even when it felt like everything was going wrong
they made things right because they were strong
i think now that my brother and i are grown
we see the true value in family and home
my parents had little help along the way
and when the whole world seemed bleak & gray
they'd find that silver lining
the sun was always shining
when you have that faith
that you were not meant to break
and i'm so grateful
for my roots

Sometimes i think it's tragic
how the world has lost its magic
how we turn blind eyes to those in need
when we all cry, laugh, love and bleed
we all have souls, bodies are just on loan
and someday we'll leave, we'll be gone
what kind of life are you living?
are love & kindness gifts you're giving?
our differences are what makes us unique
you have a voice & a choice to speak
sometimes i think i was born to fight
taught to stand up for what is right
when you're carrying that heavy load
know that there's blessings down the road
that you get back what you put out
so free yourself from worry & doubt
be the best you that you can be
fill the world with love and you are free

close your eyes and count to ten
and you'll see where to begin
this is your life, this moment, right now
nevermind the why, forget about the how
the answers are already there
there's so much beauty for you to share
in your smile, in your laughter
don't chase happily ever after
make it happen, it's a choice
in this life we're meant to rejoice
whether you're a sinner or saint
the canvas is there for you to paint
so spread your colors, spread them bright
let your words fill up the night
be yourself because you shine
know that you're gonna be just fine
when your spirits need that lift
remember that you were a gift

i wonder who you are to teach
maybe you should practice what you preach
and not focus on all the bad
of a world gone completely mad
i think it's always been your duty
to find the truth, to find the beauty
to love each other, through and through
because it's the right thing to do
you have no place to judge, to condemn
to tell other's that they sin
you pedestal will crack, you will fall
because you just can't have it all
you can't say what's right or wrong
who fits in and who doesn't belong
because we are all different, all unique
why do you feel the need to speak
to express discontent
over how their time is spent
because it really shouldn't matter
i fear that someday you will shatter
because you claim to be perfect
& nobody is

i see you stringing my words together
wondering if it's now or forever
and i saw that look on your face
that you were ready for the chase
because i was never easy to obtain
addicted to the beauty within the pain
i was best left alone
better at doing things on my own
no one there to drag me down
wanted to escape & leave this town
i grew my wings fast, over night
and i was ready to take that flight
into the unknown & find the truth
the misgivings of a misspent youth
then you caught me, completely unaware
the way you ran your fingers through my hair
and whispered words i needed to hear
you made it real, you made it clear
that i was always
worth the chase

untitled

i saw you standing on the street
you looked innocent, you looked sweet
and i knew that we were meant to dance
perhaps this was our only chance
and our paths may never cross again
i would've been happy to call you friend
but my time is short, moments fleeting
i can feel it in my heart, how it's beating
i knew that you would never be mine
because we're all just here on borrowed time
but my life is passing so fast
how i wish this moment would last
even though we didn't speak
i felt it proper to kiss your cheek
give a little wave and hurry away
but you really made my day
and when i close my eyes tonight
i'll remember how you held me tight
and never even knew that i was dying
i've embraced it now, no time for crying
i'm living every moment as full as i can
because it wasn't meant for me to understand
but i have to say thank you for giving me this
another little moment i won't have to miss
i saw you standing on the street
you looked innocent, you looked sweet

you can cut your hair
dye it, straighten it
curl it or throw it in a pony tail
you can work out
mold your body to perfection
or eat cake and try not to worry
you can paint your nails
line your eyes
and slather on lip gloss
or roll outta bed and get dressed
you can be what "they" want
or who you want
and whatever that may be
you're perfect
just the way you are
if you're happy
so ladies
please love yourself
be kind to yourself
and to each other

baby's got the blues
but she won't lose
that starry look in her eyes
paint it up with crimson skies
and spin her around
she don't wanna be found
because she dances with the night
there's no wrong, there's no right
just the feelings, pure emotion
she lets it rock her like an ocean
sometimes she's down, sometimes up
let her drink from a broken cup
will she laugh or will she cry?
sometimes she just wants to fly
& when she sings
she grows wings
and becomes an angel

standing in the sand, down by the sea
will you be there, waiting for me?
you don't have to understand
just be there to take my hand
will you lead me or let me go
maybe i don't want to know
i just need your lips on mine
words whispered sweet like wine
& i will always see your face
across all time & space
it's always moments like this
that i don't want to miss
a minute of being with you
& how we always make it through
when i find myself against a storm
it's your arms that keep me safe & warm

i.
will you walk me through the storm
and keep me safe and warm
will you love me through sunshine and rain
and try to save me from the pain
when i feel like i'm going to break
will you love me after every mistake
and welcome me home
the only place that i belong
will you see yourself in me
am i what you want me to be
when i feel like i'm not good enough
will you be there to show me love
and will you always have my hand
& try your best to understand
give me roots, give me wings
show me the beauty in simple things

ii.
i will walk you through the darkest night
and always help you find the light
i'll protect you no matter the weather
you're in my heart, now and forever
i'll piece you back together should you fall
and i know you're ready to give it your all
home is where people love you for all that you are
and as long as you need me i won't be far
i see bits and pieces of myself shining through
you should know that no matter what you do
always good enough, more than you know
it doesn't matter where you go
i'll be ready anytime, any place
to offer you that comforting embrace
God gave you life, I was the tool
never let the world make you cruel
see the beauty in simple pleasure
because your life is truly a treasure
i'll love you, so be free and wild
i am your mother, you are my child

where are you going, where have you been?
i wonder if i'll ever find you again
the way your mind is start to slip
this has been the most difficult trip
years together, i wasn't prepared
to let go of the life we shared
sorrow washes down like rain
as i watch you suffer, see your pain
and i feel so helpless, so alone
sometimes it's like you're already gone
disease crept in, like a thief
left us wrapped up in our grief
sometimes i wish i could set you free
find the man you used to be
the one that was lost along the way
now struggles through life every day
i know it wasn't your choice
to forget my face, forget my voice
i feel it cracking, pieces of my heart
i wonder if i'll find my way through the dark
i'm tired of questioning why
i can't save you or i'd try
but i'm here
and i love you

i'll sing softly, until you're asleep
i know you were never mine to keep
i'll ignore the tears that roll down my face
because i know you'll be in a better place
my decisions, you shouldn't have to pay
every night i'll get down on my knees and pray
that you find such happiness, a family of your own
i'm so sorry that i couldn't give you a home
but i'm too young and i don't know what to do
and all i want is what's best for you
i never knew a pain that could rip me apart
but i feel it now, the way it's breaking my heart
for nine months i kept thinking that maybe
there'd be a way i could keep my baby
but i'm stumbling, lost and afraid
papers are signed, decisions made
the best i've ever been was wrapped up in you
tiny fingers and toes, eyes so soft and blue
and i will hold on to these moments we had together
you will be in my heart always and forever
i cry as i give you my final kiss
i hope someday you'll understand this
and you'll grow up happy

she was the woman he couldn't save
as he sits there beside her grave
and remembers how it used to be
when they were young, they were free
he just wanted her to have it all
he watched her slip, watched her fall
into a darkness he didn't understand
it was in the way she'd hold his hand
the way she'd cry herself to sleep
he didn't know the sadness was so deep
he'd buy her gifts, bring her flowers
stroke her hair, hold her for hours
promise her they'd have more time, maybe tomorrow
it wasn't him, he just couldn't see all the sorrow
he found fear in the freshness of cuts on her skin
and he wishes he could just say i love you again
he didn't see how she felt so alone
and now it's too late, she's already gone
pills by the bedside, too many to swallow
and he's never felt so empty, so hollow
a note wrote in shaky hand
begging him to try and understand
that this wasn't his fault, he wasn't too blame
a pain so dark and deep it didn't have a name
nothing caused this, the break in her mind
maybe happiness wasn't hers to find
but she wanted him to know
that wherever he should go
she'd always love him true
there wasn't anything that he could do
because he was already the best
in the life she had, it was such a mess
she didn't know how to make the pieces fit
the game was over, she had to quit
because the days seemed never-ending
it hurt too much to keep pretending
that she could be more than what she was
he finds comfort in this bottle, too much drinking
but it eases the pain so he's not thinking
and remembering
the woman he couldn't save

sometimes i wanna shed this skin
& know what it's like to begin again
let go of the weight that drags me down
there's got to be more than this town
the life that i've created, part of me
all the things that i want to set free
i've struggled to bury it deep
sometimes i just wanna sleep
wake up to something more
find something worth fighting for
thoughts weighing heavy on my mind
struggling against the chains that bind
but of all the words ever said
truth in this: there's hope ahead
life is fleeing moments, passing us by
there's always a reason to hope, to try
like a flame that's burning bright
watching stars fill up the night
take a moment to sing and laugh
i'll leave a trail of words, follow the path

the world wasn't always so cold & black
won't you let me take you back
to a time where lightnin' bugs lit up the skies
and we'd play in the creek & make mud pies
baseball in back yards, homeruns past the fence
back in the day where life made more sense
and the biggest worry was your mama getting mad
you didn't know what it was like to really be sad
we'd make a bed, right there in the grass
didn't know the world was made of glass
back then things were so sure
and we were all so pure
so beautifully untainted
oh the life we had painted
we'd play without worry, without fear
laugh so loud the whole world could hear
find the joy in such simple things
playground tag, racing to the swings
and it was impossible for us to hush
always moving, always in a rush
too ready to just grow up
time couldn't pass fast enough
so now i tell my children to take it slow
because they still have a long way to go
but that time will pass before we know it
sometimes you can't go back but you can remember

disillusioned, she hopes that someone will care
about how much time she spends on make up and hair
lips so red and eyes lined black
how did she get so far off track?
she wears tight clothes, likes to show skin
but she knows that she'll never really fit in
and the lights they flatter
the areas that matter
in this club she likes to dance
maybe she'll get a second chance
to save herself, to finally live
if only she can learn to forgive
the ones that hurt her, left her to die
after time the tears run dry
and she feels empty, alone
no place that she can call home
because they took his word, called her a liar
locked her away when she set his house on fire
she runs his words through her head
how he tried to **** her, left her for dead
he said that good girls would never tell
and she told him she'd see him in hell
he ruined the good in her, made her afraid
mistake after mistake, it was all she made
years go by and they finally set her free
and she doesn't know who she should be
it's easiest here, in this dusty old bar
trying to find meaning in the backseat of a car
and night after night the memories return
all she can see is watching it burn
she doesn't know how to be whole again
and it makes her sick when they touch her skin
but she smiles through the pain
their words run down like rain
she knows when they take her hand
that they will never understand
how broken she really is

you hold on to your tears
like souvenirs
you won't let them flow
because you can't let go
memories and pain
wash over you like rain
and you're walking the same old path
afraid to smile, afraid to laugh
it doesn't hurt to frown
and no one will let you down
if you're always prepared
to distrust those who've cared
when you're ready, you'll move on
find the road that will lead you home
arms that welcome you
hearts that love you true
and never give up
because you're worth it

skies of blue and fields of green
walk with me inside this dream
braid flowers through my hair
and we'll pretend the world isn't there
in these moments of smiles and laughter
this is what i've been after
these moments of peace
and the sweet release
of being myself, full & whole
can you see inside my soul
because i feel you dancing there
whispered words float through the air
and my heart skips a beat
to find a feeling this sweet
and this pure
but are you sure?
do you really understand
how i feel when i hold your hand
because i feel magic

stitch me up, with needle and thread
and calm the noise inside my head
and all the thoughts that bring me down
the emptiness of this town
it weighs me down like a wet coat
sink or swim or will i float?
sing to me, soft and sweet
calm the tapping of my feet
nervous habits are hard to break
and sometimes it's too much to take
do you know what this is, the way i feel
when it's hard to distinguish what is real
because the world is just so full
and i can feel her pull
and i'm afraid i'll fall
why do i risk it all?
for the beauty of the joy and pain
music pours down like rain
and my senses are so alive
i don't know that i'll survive
because it always seems like too much
the way we laugh, the way we touch
longing to be connected
adored and respected
and then left alone
to find my way home
because i always need that space
and the peace of finding my place
in this world covered in dust and vines
i long for the sun and how she shines
but even the rays become too bright
and i crave the comfort of the night
because i can hide
the way it feels inside
to feel so much
all at once

when you feel like it's too much to bear
just know that i'll always be there
when the world turns to gray and black
and you can feel the wolves at your back
when the night feels so cold and dark
& all the worries are heavy in your heart
when you lose the stars in the sky
and your mountains seem too high
when you feel like you're all alone
i'll be there to guide you home
when you feel confused and out of place
remember my words, remember my face
when you're drinking from a broken cup
i'll be praying you never give up
because this life is so beautiful, so real
and sometimes it's too hard to feel
without it becoming such a drain
and you empty it out, hold the pain
and you can't, you have to let go
of everything you think you know
grow your dreams big and bright
and watch them dance across the night
because you are worth so much more
than you give yourself credit for
even though my body isn't here
i don't want you to shed a tear
you don't have to see
to know that it's me
because i am always with you

he wore a story across his face
head bowed down, so out of place
scars always run deeper than we see
all he wanted was to feel free
from the looks, questioning eyes
but he's always ready with new lies
stories to spin because the truth is too dark
the way it aches and twists in his heart
a busted vase, mama's new flowers
the nightmares come in waking hours
the abuse was a truth too brutal to share
and in the end would anyone care
the boy that no one wanted, the "mistake"
he knew someday she'd finally break
in the house that was never a home
she lit a fire and left him alone
but he knew mama was never stable
the loving part of her, it was never able
to kiss boo-boo's or hold his hand
it wasn't for him to understand
and now he sits here, day after day
looking for a new reason to pray
hoping that someone will love him as is
because this choice, it was never his
the scars on his face are hard to bear
and he just longs for someone to be there
to love him, this sweet broken boy

go on and sing your words, so sugary sweet
and i'll feel that rhythm in my feet
i'll want to dance the night away
if you tell me that you want me to stay
and i'll whisper softly, only the truth
take you back to our distant youth
and we will be free & fly like birds
promise you'll remember my words
because i won't always be here, in the now
you'll always find your way somehow
it's in the gentle words we speak
in the guiding hands we seek
the family we make, the friends we meet
the wealthy ones or beggars on the street
it's in the heart, this connection
that will lead us in the right direction
and find the life we're destined for
so always dream and hope for more
find the strength in how beautiful you are
and it won't matter if I'm near or far
don't let this life pass you by
spread your wings, it's time to fly
i'm already leaving this world behind
i'll always be yours and you will be mine
when you're lying in fields of clover
know that you'll find love over and over
in many forms, each one new
as long as you stay sweet and true
don't let the world make you sad
& find the good amongst the bad
find love in everyone you meet
and sing those song, so sugary sweet

she promises they'll make it somehow
as she wipes the sweat from her brow
and she'll work her fingers to the bone
do whatever to make their house a home
when the night becomes quiet and still
the tears don't numb all that she'll feel
worry hangs like an anchor, it aches
she's made up of more than her mistakes
she dreams of a better life, a new tomorrow
she's smiling through the confusion and sorrow
she finds her salvation in many places
finds that hope in her children's faces
knows that strength is always within
each day is a fresh start, a place to begin
there's so much sweetness in her children's laughter
and this is all she needs for happily ever after
it's them against the world, a one way track
she has no reason to ever look back
because what was life before all this?
not a single moment she's willing to miss
but bills have to be paid, food on the table
she'll do it all (and more when she's able)
because she wants to give them so many things
give them roots and later their wings
role model for her daughter and son
she's two parents rolled into one

push away the darkness, the pain
& watch the world swallow your pain
give yourself up, finally be free
is this the person you should be?
don't let one day ruin them all
chasing dreams you're bound to fall
but you keep running, don't quit
find the pieces that finally fit
all the things that make you whole
are already there, inside your soul
it can be overwhelming, all the emotion
that rocks you like an ocean
should you laugh or should you cry?
almost makes you wonder why
we're here at all, the purpose, the plan
somethings we're not meant to understand
just breathe, take it slow
you already know which way to go
so push away the darkness, the pain
& watch the world swallow your pain

you're not gonna bother to think
before you pour another drink
so go ahead and mix it up
until you feel like you're pretty enough
calm the thoughts that race through your mind
dancing around under lights that blind
looking for someone to hold you near
they'll whisper whatever you want to hear
determined the world will drive you insane
you can't stand to feel the pain
so here we go, you're gonna drink
bottles empty fast
trying to outrun the past
let go of the life that chains you down
baby you'll never leave this town
can't get one foot in front of the other
statistics, are you just another?
you have this plan every day
that you're not gonna let it slip away
that you'll fight whatever's worth fighting for
and you won't do this, drink anymore
and you feel like you're thinking clearer
until you look inside the mirror
feel the weights heavy like chains
and you know what will ease the pains
of life, of living
tired of giving
and it's so easy to fall
when you've lost it all
and the bottle knows your name

all these thoughts will be set in motion
in your eyes i see the ocean
on your lips i'll taste the sea
this is the life you've given me
in your hands i'll feel the earth
finally i'll understand my worth
that it was never meant for man
too many people can't understand
that it's about loving yourself first
only then will you quench the thirst
and find that burning desire
nights will burn away like fire
there's no point in feeling alone
once it's felt it's never gone
because we are all connected, so deep
the sound of trees will lull us to sleep
dreaming, wishing, it's now a duty
to find the hope, the faith in beauty
it always feels so fresh and new
every time i dance with you

feels rough, like nails in your side
and you just want to run & hide
the way it crumbles... such a mess
and you can't fight the brokeness
the darkness wants to drag you down
water so deep you're gonna drown
lost and stumbling inside a bad dream
stuck between whisper and scream
sky grows gray, clouds roll in
you know you're gonna cry again
but tears don't come when you're too tired to fight
always searching for that hope, a simple light
to let you know you're not alone
that someday you'll make it home
in this land where even trees weep
the dead walk and there's no sleep
blood and violence are plenty
eyes hollow and words so empty
lost inside yourself, human or beast?
waiting for that sweet release
a reason to struggle through
something or someone to save you
but you have to save yourself

they dont know her, not like i do
behind the eyes turned black and blue
they don't see her, the way that i see
a caged bird that wants to be free
they see weakness, the unknown
who can't hide secrets in her home
and it's the fear of what they don't understand
that makes them unwilling to take her hand
offer words of comfort, support or hope
they might as well string up her rope
it's the indifference, how no one seems to care
they see an empty shell, but someone is in there!
i will always know her as the girl who hid among the flowers
who shared my secrets and we'd talk for hours
who saved every injured animal she ever met
is she really that easy to forget?
she baked cookies for those left old and alone
because she knew what it was like to not feel at home
to wander the streets, day after day
always seeking better, determined to find a way
she truly was good at heart
this is why it tears me apart
to know she deserved so much more
and never found what she was searching for
weeks pass and i'm still holding on
it hurts too much to think that she's gone
the girl who sang when the world was sad
a hard and dark life was all she had
but she hung on, longer than anyone expected
the girl who should've been protected
because she saw good everywhere
so tonight i'm going to say a prayer
and find faith that she's in a better place
where tears and bruises won't touch her pretty face

i pray these feelings will pass
sometimes your words cut like glass
and leave me so broken, so alone
in this place i try to call home
and i wanted more than this
how it hurts with every kiss
and sometimes i just feel afraid
picking apart all the decisions i've made
because is this me
who i wanted to be
or did i fall short, full of mistake
pain in every breath i take
when i feel worthless, empty
and the tears fall plenty
and i just wanna sleep
fall into the dark & deep
or grow wings and fly away
why even bother to pray
when it doesn't change
everything looks strange
it all starts to shatter
i just wanted to matter