I stand alone,
wind blowing around me
at the end of my time.
A shattered being
that at some point had resembled a human.

The sky is black and
scattered stars light up the wold around me.
How could such a beautiful world
bring so much agony?

I am so completely alone.
Water rushes across my feet;
a sign that the tide is rising.
How peaceful it would be
to become one with the waves.
How lovely it would be
to never hurt again.

I'm standing here screaming
'Please, God, take my life.'
But he isn't listening.
So I rip at my flesh and
beckon sweet death.
But it does not arrive.

I sit back and watch my life
become destroyed and devastated.
One simple mistake,
and now I have to pay for it.
My job and my future career,
even school and friends.
Gone-they're never coming back.

How am I meant to survive
with nothing left to fight for?
I can smile and make believe,
but my eyes are dead.

As I watch the stars twinkle above me,
I close my eyes and breathe, whispering
"Death, come to me.'

A mistake was made.
I was in the wrong place
at the wrong time
and suddenly
my life is over.
Dreams and ambitions
are completely shattered.
The job I had once loved
is ripped from my dead hands.
I stand and scream at the God
I believe is no longer there.
Numbness is a cloud that
drapes over my body
blanketing me in depression.
This is the end.

I'm trapped in my head,
and there's no way out.
I'm screaming and crying,
but there's no one to hear me.
Can't you tell I'm dying here?
There's no longer a life-line
for me to hang on to.
I'm drowning in here.
I'm struggling to take a breath.
I'll smile to prove I'm okay,
but the hurt on your face
haunts me every day.
I can't help the dreams
or the flashbacks which keep me screaming.
Self-medication won't take away
the constant throb of pain.
I'm hurting the ones I love
with the thoughts in my head.
The crossroads of red
are the only things making me feel alive.
I'm an actress;
everything will be alright
as long as I keep pretending.

Who is that girl in the mirror?
Her eyes are vacant and red.
Hair is uncombed and knotted.
Track marks line her arms,
and she’s smiling, but those eyes.
They’re haunted and dead.
What have you seen, girl?
The horrors are forced back.
Repressed memories torment her mind-
what’s left of it, anyways.

She’s only 12, but she looks 19.
A life on the streets;
Her own personal hell.
Abandoned and left to die
by a dad that didn’t know
how to raise a child.
Drugs and alcohol his main priority.

You wouldn’t last a minute
living inside my head.
What have I seen?
God can’t save my soul.
Time does heal the wounds,
but a band-aid is only temporary.
There’s a toxic hole
where my heart should be.

The scars are still there;
Those men in expensive cars
smelling like alcohol and cigarettes.
Maybe I’ll make some money for food
or try to find some new clothes.
Young girls don’t last too long
outside in the cold.

Our pasts don’t define us,
but they sure as hell create us.
Maybe they’ll break us
and remake us.
But what has been broken
can't always be repaired.

I can't fight anymore,
I've given all I can give.
You've been gone for so long,
and all I have are memories.
Why do I try?
I know I'm gonna fall down.
I could scream in your face,
but you would never hear me.
Your blank expression
keeps me guessing.
I would give up my life
to hear you say "I love you"
Your silence hurts more
than your fists ever could.
I'm standing here dying, daddy.
Where have you gone?
It hurts to know
you will never support me.
No matter what I do,
I am never good enough for you.
I just want you to say
"Hey, you did great!"
and love me for me,
but I'd be hoping for pigs to fly.
I'm never going to live up to
your high expectations.
Maybe you'd miss me
if I was dead.

If only you could have seen me yesterday,
I was running around and refusing change.
But I found this passion,
something indescribable.
If you had looked the other day,
you would have seen a broken heart
or the battle scars.
But I've broken from the chains,
I'm finally feeling alive.
I am not what I have done,
I'm what I've overcome.
I know I will stumble,
and maybe fall down.
But the sky ahead is golden
and the sun warms my bones.
I've made my mistakes,
but who hasn't?
The going will get rough,
but I will not break.
I have someone saving me.