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Ashlee Jul 2013
A little boy
That tells no lies
Has no soul
But hears the cries

Of the dead
Broken
And the bruised
But can’t find his heart
He’s only been used

“Can’t trust the world”
It only brings pain
Like the footsteps in the night
And the soft patter of rain

It can be nice
Soothing at first
But cold as ice
When you hear the truth

He blocks it out
The lies
The names
And the blows
He takes life as it comes
And then he goes

Nothings’ right
In this life of hurt
With pain and cuts
Of things that burn

The holes in his heart
Show the deep pain
It feels the dark
And leaves blood stains

His life’s a *****
Maybe it’s deserved
From a way he stitched
Up those many wounds

He tried again and again
To open up and love
And regretted it once more
As he fell father below than above

He closed off his heart
And shut off his feelings
He killed his soul
He ripped it apart
He was tortured
Until he became numb
He destroyed his love
And only hurt
And only felt pain
He dealt with it though
He put his skin under the blade
He put the fire to his body
He tore at his problems
Which were in a single form
A person he knew
Once very well
He knew this person
He’d come from hell
Lucifer himself
That’s his name
Or was it his own
Because they both
Held the same form
The same body
He was his own nightmare
He was his own demon
He was the center of his pain

If only he could see
Just what he means
To me
Ashlee Jul 2013
Lost in the Stars

Star lit skies light the night,
and darkness loves with arms open wide.
Creatures hold still and all is quiet.
Hush little babe; please don’t fight.
She lies in the night, high up in the stars.
She may look it, but she isn’t that far.
Look deep within, within that broken heart;
see her there, there from the start.
Loved you she did, and loved you she will;
just as the future is, time with tell.
Things may be hard, more than once I fell.
Nothing is easy ***, even looks can ****.
The sun can shine brighter than darkness and pain.
The stars are just as beautiful, it’s all the same.
Listen to the wind, it speaks your name.
Love falls down to you like autumn, love bares no shame.
She taught her children to do well and to stand
tall, be humble and for men to be a man.
Never forget she lives in the hearts and in the land,
forever she will be in the night and trembling hands.

She gave a love that was everlasting.
She gave a heart to hold you close.
She gave you her life so you could stay.
She died loving you with all her soul.
She died lost in the stars.
Ashlee Jul 2013
Kitty

He wishes to die
As he screams to the sky
With hatred in his voice
And hurt in his eyes

So close yet so far
I want to kiss the scars
That scatters his body
And leaves him marred

I want to protect his heart forever
And keep it but let it go, never
Mend the wounds inside
And make him feel better
Ashlee Jul 2013
Mommy

little girl six years old
saw mommy in pain
ask what had happened to her skin
“they’re only from a game,
you see. Daddy likes to play”

she looked at mommy one last time
she saw her broken smile
another bruise across her cheek
that had stayed a while

she never knew why mommy played
a game that would only hurt
she accepted mommy’s cries of sorrow
she wondered about her blood stained shirt

mommy hid behind the couch
as daddy slurred his words
another drunken night again
another world of hurt

hiding under broken tables
surrounded by shattered glass
seeing daddy play his game
I wished it was a forgotten past

brother tried to fight him off
doing the best he can
saying “***** close your eyes,
it time to be a man.”

I couldn’t help to listen
to the few words he had said
I watched as he blocked poor mommy
he had stood up to dad

he took the first blows
daddy laughed as he saw brother glare
with hatred in his eyes
and plain emptiness there

brother got mad
and socked daddy back
he’d broken daddy’s nose
because of that ******* laugh

it held joy in all the blows
the things that broke mommy
all ones that made her cry
the ones that crippled her body

brother had saved my mommy
with the fourth hit he gave
daddy got knocked flat on his back
his self esteem had caved

we ran from that monster
and were saved by an angel
hes my brother
he's my mommy's savior

— The End —