I've erased a hundred poems.

I've deleted a thousand rhymes.

I'm up late again,
writing words you'll never read.

My heart captive
in the twilight of a phone screen,
but my mind finally freed.

There's distance in your eyes
that wasn't there before.
There's a look that you give me
that says you aren't sure.

We keep standing at this cliff
looking over the edge.
You say you want to jump.
I say I want to fly.

I'm not the same girl...
You're not the same boy.
We live in a world of gray
A world devoid of joy.

I want to be the best version of me
...But I mostly want it for you.
I want that look in your eyes to return
...So we can be what we used to.

Let's step back from this ledge
Start over and make life new.
This cliff is too high for jumping
Let's climb down - we already flew.

Sometimes I can’t help but wonder
If you ever still think about me
If I ever cross your mind at all
And if you’ve ever once felt guilty

Because I still think about you
Much more often than I desire
And every single time I do
It’s like my brain’s been set on fire

I think about the person I once was
Hopeful, jubilant, and carefree
Every day was an exciting adventure
And my whole life was ahead of me

But you took all that happiness away
With your words as sharp as knives
Its amazing, through so much mental abuse
How the body still survives

Because you caused so much damage
That it has lasted all this time
And though the scars were never visible
What you did should be a crime

Even though I left you years ago
Your words live on within me
It makes me feel like I am trapped
And from this pain, I can never flee

They say “Forgiveness doesn’t make you weak”
And that “Its what can finally set you free”
But I could never find it in me to forgive you
Because you destroyed all the good I had in me

480

“Why do I love” You, Sir?
Because—
The Wind does not require the Grass
To answer—Wherefore when He pass
She cannot keep Her place.

Because He knows—and
Do not You—
And We know not—
Enough for Us
The Wisdom it be so—

The Lightning—never asked an Eye
Wherefore it shut—when He was by—
Because He knows it cannot speak—
And reasons not contained—
—Of Talk—
There be—preferred by Daintier Folk—

The Sunrise—Sire—compelleth Me—
Because He’s Sunrise—and I see—
Therefore—Then—
I love Thee—

I can be a better woman.
I can be a better wife.
I can be a better mother.
I can have a better life.

We can pack our bags together
Move somewhere by the sea.
We can say **** the world
Because this is the best we're meant to be.

I'm not a princess darling
You don't ride a white horse.
There's no one coming to save us
You're the hero of course.

So whisper in my ear.
Please tell me one more time.
These broken dreams were never promises
And everything will be fine.

Sometimes late at night
... I wonder if you think of me.
Do you remember
my voice, my touch, your profanity.

Do you lie awake
and regret your mistake?
Or am I just a toy
that you couldn't break?