There's something deliciously beautiful about watching another inhale fumes from a cigarette,
sat on the window sill, or led in bed.
There lips caress the filter, hand sturdy, still,
a slow drag in, pause, out.
Swirls beyond swirls seen in the moons dim light,
here the tragic line between beauty and death.

I wrote poetry on your skin.

Tracing every part of your body with a finger
My favorite was writing in french, tragedies,
A silent truth an inevitable one.

One my Father had told me previously on the back of a napkin
But you didn't know about the beauty of the patterns on your shoulders
Or the secrets hidden amidst your chest

Instead you fell silently into a subconscious bliss
Unconcerned about the predictions that covered your sleeping self
They sunk,
Deep,
Into your skin.

And you didn't care.

Your drugs come in a plastic baggie inhaled through your nose,
I inhale the scent of your skin looking at you i froze,

My parents warned me about you, a bad boy with good lips,
Overdosing on your mystery your mind concealed like a solar eclipse,

Puffing on a beneficial herb that makes you sleep at night,
Who'd of known i could become high from you; a tragically damaged delight.

You kissed me for the last time before you drove away in your car,
My mind repeating the words I'd spoke out I think I'd gone to far,
Foggy were your eyes, rage burning mine,
You found a pretty blonde to play with, I'd gone to far this time,
And yet one hundred miles away I wake with your speckled face in mind,
Deceived by my own feelings greed had made me blind,
It's only now I walk the day with doubt only now the night i lack,
Lack the courage to tell you I'm sorry, but It's far too late to ever go back.

The first time I met you I questioned your place
Looking into your sad eyes, your mysterious face
The way you just stood there fixed on my eyes
Feelings of electric between you and me flies
The first time you kissed me I had my eyes shut
But I can't forget the feelings I felt in my gut
Some strange hold you had over me I simply cannot loose
And so I had made a decision,  I had to choose
But I cannot regret that decision that I made
For if one relationship didn't end ours would of fade
And so we're here, unsure of where we stand
Led in the darkness holding your hand
Listening to sad stories about your past
Opening up your feelings letting me in at last
I admire your courage I'm in love with your smile
Wait a bit longer, just for a little while.

They say if you look up at the moon someone somwhere is looking up too,

That night the moon was clear as can be and so I reminiced of you and me,

A time and a date many memories ago
A place full of happiness never any woe,

A night so bright it shimmered like gold
A love affair of the ages never to be told,

A young romance between friends, a night time thrill
Staring at the stars I begin to feel a sudden chill,

As I glance away from the moon and the sky,
I have myself questioning why oh why?

Why did our love die like the shimmering stars,
Our love doomed, like venus and mars.

Sunset,
Reading poetry in a language unfamiliar  
Your mind focused on the pages before you
Only returning to reality to inhale fumes from the lit Cigarette you hold in your hand
Perfection is what I see
Glowing in the ambers and the topaz from the suns brilliant rays
Reaching,
I brush your lips with mine taking you off guard
The book falls from your hand
My skin taking its place
If I could have a moment forever,

God it would be this.

Society is disease
Spreading, coursing through my veins
Choking my lungs
Polluting my brain

Skin, bones, eating disorders is beauty
Being underweight is ****

stomaching to much emotionally not enough physically

Maybe i should take on smoking to get me through the day
Maybe i should do drugs to take the hunger away

Society expects too much and gives to little
This world is so corrupt.

They say if you stare at the moon someone somewhere is staring up too  
Tonight the moon was as clear as can be so I reminisced silently of a past memory
The nights we'd spend in your bedroom the morning always came to soon
How the moonlight hit your lit cigarette the way your eyes grew sad ill never forget
Live by the sun but love by the moon a friendship that deceased far too soon.

Today I woke up in a panicked state
Bones aching from lying awkwardly lines on my back from the pressing sheets
Turning over you're there breathing deeply asleep
Your facing away only your shoulder peeking up through the duvet
Thoughts racing I grab my t shirt and make way to leave
Only your hand reaches out to pull on my waist pulling me back to your side.

Used and abused
Drugs and *****
The story of her life
She sits at home
All alone but takes it in her strife

No one to listen to her no one to hear her cries
Depression starts building up inside more of her dies

Her mind dissolving
Her memories fade more as each day pass
So she takes the knife and does the deed
She releases her agony, alas.

Drifting apart like bed sheets when I wake, making a cup of coffee trying not to take
A look in my direction
last night clothes lie in a heap, you leave through the front door
I fall back to sleep

What's been and past is not worth mourning
We'll only see the pain the negative heed my warning

Memories of pain a lovers heartbreak
A face two eyes a terrible mistake

The way your mother said she'd always be there
Or the way you buried a loved one it just isn't fair

The past is doomed it travels on our back
Waiting for when we're vulnerable it ready to attack

Leave the past where it is what's done is done
Don't look behind don't look back move forward, run.

The rain taps violently against the glass which has been crying again all night
Tears stream down it's see through face until the morning light

As I sit here and look out watching droplets fall from each green leaf
I wonder why the heavens mourn who has given them so much grief?

For who could have such an effect to make even the heavens cry?
I think out loud to myself who is this person and why

Maybe the sky mourns the loss of a beautiful romance
Or perhaps the sky was too keen and made a quick advance

Perhaps it was the sun who was to shy and hide beneath a cloud
Or maybe the sun had other interests to the moon she was vowed

And so the heavens weep and weep for reasons I know not why
But I'll stay awake with the rain as it falls from the night sky.

His eyes wild flowers dancing lazily across my body frozen in time
We both dared not speak for breaking quiet thoughts seemed to much a crime

When words finally fell from his perfectly misshapen lips
He told me he loved me and traced my skin with his fingertips

Love drunk I sighed and reached for his face
Forgetting anything else only focusing on this place

This place we only knew as our lovers secret hide out
Scattered with memories and hope there was no room for any doubt

If I had seen or predicted what was in sight
Maybe I would of held onto him tight that night

He left in the dark with those wild flower eyes
No letter no call slowly time always flies

His wild flower eyes that danced in the light seem now like a dried up haze
I sit here once again with my quiet thoughts looking out and just gaze.

I allow my eyes to roam where the clouds and hills meet
Far across the country is where my thoughts fleet

Somewhere in the distance my memories lie with you
As I sit here on Foley bench I wonder if you think of me too

There's something about this place beneath the 99 pine trees
I think I hear your voice beckoned by the breeze

I wonder where you are and I hope that you're alright
I hope that your happy and that your smiling again tonight.

Green with flickers of amber gold
Olive bronzed skin to the touch cold

Sweet aroma from neck and wrist
No patch of brown speckled skin unkissed

Full head of hair to dark for browns
Four forehead wrinkles from many frowns

Cheeks pink constantly flush
My lips against yours, lovingly brush

You came unexpectedly
The sound of our laughter and our silent tears
The smell of stale tobacco and alcohol
The excitement the thrill the joy


You left unexpectedly
The sound of my cries and my silent tears
The smell of t total
The disappointment the pity the sadness

Heart like stone
Eyes a colourless tone
You put up a hard fight you won
But I still believe there's a chance for you and me
I still have hope that you're my sun
And after all this time
I see your convictions as no crime
A window where we'd sit
A cigarette that's what was lit
So give me hope through this dark patch that there will be light
And that you'll remember the winter we fell and you'll hold me tonight
Comforted by you skin and by your smell
The tattoo on your ribcage my fingers know only too well.

I am young, foolish in love
Drinking all night looking at the star filled sky above
Thinking of nothing, feeling high
Living life for today no regretful sigh

Making mistakes, many a false friend
Crying into the pillow at dusk wishing it would end
Putting on my favorite record, feeling alive
Driving fast in your car together we strive

Bad breakups, and sad love letters
Drinking tea in ugly granddad sweaters
The way the boys romanticized the words they'd speak
This is life perfect, hopeless each life unique.

Im just a notch in your bed post
But your just a line in a song

Deep thinking leaves you raw,
Like dry lips from too many cigarettes,
Lying awake makes you nostalgic,
Like the way your fingers traced my spine

Heavy drinking leaves you numb,
Like when you said good bye for good,
Crying all night makes you  vulnerable,
Like the time you told me of your past

Memories leave me agitated,
Like the way your eyes searched my own,
Forgetting makes me strong,
Like when I told myself to let you go.

The walls of this room have seen too much to be called innocent and pure,
Each starring at one another,

Not uttering a sound always keeping quiet,
Keeping in all the secrets to shameful to be told,

All the memories both violent and romantic,
Both saddening and happy,

All disappearing as time goes by.

Nothing fits anymore like
How easy it was to make friends at
School or the way I could light up a room

Nothing fits anymore like
Going out every night till the early hours and then
Heading back home in the gloom

Nothing fits anymore like
The way life seemed so care free and fresh
like summer's flowers in bloom

Nothing fits anymore and thats
Ok because life changes from light to dark just
Like the sun and the moon.

I love the smell of your skin
When I wake at 2.40 am
Your sleepy face unaware of my eyes
Sinking slowly in

The way you look when you wake
Momentarily all dazed and confused
I hold you tight against my chest
And hope that I don't loose

The speckles of brown dots
Smothering your face
Creeping around your skin
I trace each freckle very carefully
And beam a secret grin.

*A.R

I met a boy once
Who told me he was lonely
So I kept him safe from harm
He was broken lacked emotion
And made my world fall apart
The only solution was to loosen
The bond that we shared
We don't speak but its hard to keep
My emotions for him unaware.

*- A.R

Winter frosts fill the sky,
Summer and autumn have all flown by,
The trees left bare standing alone,
A child cold and tired starts to moan,

Icy lakes and cold crisp air,
Presents and wine ready to share,
Singing songs in the car,
Saying "don't worry its not too far",

The fire goes out in the place,
Winter stares us right in the face,
For dark and gloom is all we see,
Nothing warm apart from our tea,

The man in red and in white too,
Comes bearing gifts for me and you,
He places them carefully under the tree,
Little tots tucked up in bed waiting to see,

For Christmas is always the best time of year,
For love, and joy and being sincere.

Simple things usually create the happiest smile,
However those simple things only stay for a short while,
But before those simple things run away from my mind,
I want to tell you Harry these moments where my smile shined,

Back in 2011 is where my smile lies,
Behind a past of friendships parties and starry filled skies,
Where life was easy and dream could come true,
Were a friendship was unbreakable between me and you,

But then came 2012 filled with alot of change,
Smiled where for different reasons my smile became strange ,
Things that made me smile like getting through the day,
Reading books, blogs, changing my way,

It was a happy year really it started off like a bomb,
Somthings sure where tragic something where estatic one thing was called Tom,
Looking back at the year with only few I called friend,
Makes me smile at how strong I was not to  follow the trend,

2012 taught me how to be myself,
To stick up for what I believe in my opinions not to be left on the shelf,
2013 a new story will begin,
And at this new opportunity Harry I'll wear a dazzling grin,

So here's to the small things in life that have yet to make us smile,
Embrace every moment I'll make them all worth my while.  ©

You shook your head again at me an action i know only to well,
Frustration covering your face disappointment easy to tell,
The one thing that I'm best at is the one thing that you hate,
Being a failure no good be smarter, you sit and contemplate,
So we'll sit here in silence nothing more to say,
I am nothing, I am worthless thats how you made me feel today.

Skin and bones thats all you are,
Staring at the small lines on your wrists to many a scar,
Crying slowly into your shoulder,
You lower your head to mine and hold me closer,

You're high again running wild in your head,
So many cigarettes have passed your chapped lips you'll end up dead,

But you're gone in your own world melting with the stars,
It's as if we're on different planets I Venus you Mars,

I'll always be waiting and maybe we'll talk and not just speak,
You'll pull that face at me and i'll fall weak,
But until that day we'll ignore each other, we'll look like enemies,
You'll pretend you don't know me, we'll be Strangers with Memories. ©