her past was scattered and torn
with endless arguments,
letters bound together with words she didn’t ever want to hear,
and trickles of tears from eyes that were always too occupied to close,
she was always scared of the what ifs,
juggling the possibilities of what was next.
she felt fear for the first time,
wishing upon the last star in the sky,
these moments,
memories that wouldn’t erase
make her always wonder,
“is one more ever just one more?”

was it the wrong person at the right time? or the right person at the wrong time?

he opened the crevices of my mind & I let him see everything inside

you can close your eyes
and somehow still see light
you can plug your ears
and still hear muffled sounds
I can still shut my door
and hear voices
and voices
and voices
that I won't forget
I won't forget
the words that came flying through
the cracks in my door
I won't forget
the letters bound together that made up words
I never wanted to hear
I won't forget
the same letters bouncing around my head
hearing the same words
over
and over
and over
I won't forget

She always walks around with a smile on her face, but inside her pride and hope is being crushed. She tells everyone, I'm okay, its nothing. But behind that "fine" and "nothing" was another tear that trickled down her cheek, and a sleepless night. She always has her guard up, and when people ask why, she doesn't want to admit that she had been hurt too many times, and each time that guarded wall just kept getting higher. She always puts effort into every little thing she does, and still feels like she will always get the short end of the stick. She always feels as if she will never be recgonized as the person she believes that she is.

She's hurt.

someday, you'll get over him. you'll realize that his scent will fade away from clinging to your car seats. you'll realize that his body won't lay in your bright blue sheets anymore. you'll realize that he won't be the shoulder you'll cry on, or the one you'll call at 3 AM to come pick you up because your parents are fighting again. you'll realize that he won't post cute pictures of you anymore, and won't text you saying he needs you more than ever & your heart aches for him because of how much you love him. you'll realize that you won't be going on anymore dates anytime soon. you'll realize that everything will be okay and you have to move on once your heart breaks because there's art in everything that heals.

you’re my sunday morning
the feeling of sleeping past sunrise
waking up with a smile
you’re my first cup of coffee
when the rooster calls
my only hopes of getting through the day
you’re my lemonade
on a scorching august day
ice clinking in the glass with each refreshing drink
you give me a reason to believe that
even though “people always leave”
some are always meant to stay