April Dean

April Dean Jan 2015

A ghost drifted into town
No one knew her name
Her parents moved straight through her
Her peers talked around her
If anyone noticed the ghost
They became a ghost too
The ghost tried speaking
But to no avail
The other ones around her
Gave her no peace.
The bright light in her mind
Could not reach around the corners

I do not know where this ghost is now
but I know how she feels.

April Dean Jan 2015

We Decieve Ourselves

I'm fiNE.
nEver felt better.
have you Decided
on AnytHing in yoUr future?
if you haven't
Give up.

April Dean Jan 2015

We Ignored Her

She called for us
We ignored her
She called again
Still we paid no mind
She stopped calling
Did we care?
She slit her throat
We did not stop
Her heart did.
Only then did we look up
and realize we were wrong.

Our present is important
Hers was too
If we paid some attention
Her blood is on our hands
We paid no attention
When we had the chance.

Now our future is built on one more ****** corpse.
Complain if we must

We put it there.

April Dean Jan 2015

The Evil in our Hearts

The Evil in our Hearts
feeds on our Dream.
Forgotten Lyrics to a Song You never sang
The Plot to a Story barely conceived
The Musings of great Minds barely noted
The Insignificance rang.
Nothing perceived.
How convoluted.
The Color forgotten
The Answers hidden
Pathways invisible
You say You tried.
Wrong.
You gave up before You started.

This Evil in our Hearts
is Fear.

Fear of
the Unknown
What comes next
being Insignificant
Forgetting
being Forgotten
Never being Known
Emerging from the Shadows

with a Dream to change
Music
Art
Science
Passion is the Key
The Key to overcome our Evil
is not Fearlessness.
The Key is Courage.
Courage to overcome this Pain
Surely This is true.

My Evil keeps Me hidden.
The Shadows are my Refuge.
Step into the Light.
Inspiration floods the dulled Heart.
And then You know
Your Dream Was Real.

April Dean Jan 2015

My Pain

I'm only one person.
What can I do?
My mind splits in two.
Right and Wrong are not the pieces.
And excitement lingers
only in my memory.
I have forgotten
How people speak.
I have hidden
for too long.
My eyes burn
because I cannot sleep.
My head hurts
because I cannot think.
My body hurts
yet I know not why.
Movement startles me.
Sound startles me.
Pain cripples me.
I feel no motive.
Why am I here?
Why am I?
Am I?
I
don't
know
the
answer
to
my
own
questions

April Dean Jan 2015

The Sky Changed

Why have the days gone?
The sunny days have gone
leaving only clouded days.
At night
I see no stars.
By day
The blue sky's grey.
The warm scent of the plants blooming
has been replaced by
the cold scent of death.
My heart
feels hollow.
My breath
is shallow.
My eyes are red.
Add a pain
in my head.
These thoughts
hurt.
My sunshine is hidden.
The moonlight doesn't shine.
These glorious, happy days of mine
are
gone.
How long has it been?
An eternity?
Bearing with this heaviness
Where do I go?
What do I do?
Can I change?
Must I change?
Will change become me?
I have forgotten
the warmth of the sun
the special mystery of the moon.
The stars don't speak to me
and I don't to them.
My childhood
warmed by ignorance
is
gone.

April Dean Dec 2012

One of Many

Suppose our chains break free.
What are we now?
Who are our minds?
Our minds think alike.
We think as a single person.
You and I? No.
We think as us.
Do we think for ourselves?
How our thoughts are intertwined!
But we are as lemmings.
Mindless.
Followers.
Do we think for ourselves?
We think as a group.
Our thoughts run as one.
Twin powers.
Multiplied by millions of voices.
Unanimously we cry.
Do others hear our voice?
We would never know.
Whether our cries come an inch away
or a mountain away
We are not heard.
We have different skins.
Different faces.
Should we not be different from one another?
Our minds should not be so close.
We need privacy.
Our thoughts should be our own.
My thoughts should be mine.
Your thoughts should be yours.
Different people.
But common thoughts bind us as one.
Break free of the bindings!
Break free of distress!
Break free to be your own person.
I am my own.