there's something different
in my face,
in my eyes
i'm caught in a swirl of emotions
that i can no longer hide

that doesn't matter
i'm going soon
i will no longer
be terribly bruised

soon i'll be going
and then i'll be gone
i want you to know,
you did nothing wrong

as i get closer,
to my terrible death
your figuring it out
but are nearly close

i wish you knew
that i'm going
going,
and then i'm gone

i look in the mirror,
i want to see a skinny girl,
a beautiful girl,
but i don't

all i see is me,
ugly,
fat,
stupid,
worthless,
unhappy

i'm not like them,
they are pretty,
they are skinny,
they are smart,
they are worth something,
they are happy

sometimes,
i want to break that ******* mirror,
I've already had enough bad luck
whats the difference if i have more

sometimes,
i want to break down and cry,
i don't want to show my skin,
i don't want to show my fat
i don't want to fake smiling anymore

we all have our flaws,
i have so many,
i am a flaw

you can call me anything,
"ugly"
"fat"
"******"
"stupid"
"dramatic"
"annoying"
yo­u can call me anything,
those words don't tear me down
just don't call me retarted
it kills me

over time,
you loose home
**** happens,
if you didn't already know

i lost everyone
i just can't stay strong
and now,
i'm lost, confused and broken

people promised me it would get better
life continued to get worse
they said it could only get better,
well, i'm rock bottom

i'm not going anywhere
i'm staying here
i can't do anything about it
i'm rock bottom

i can't go up,
i can't go down,
i can't get help
i can't move on

when you're  rock bottom
people tell you the only way is up,
they are wrong
i

why the hell,
did you pity me?

deal with it,
i had my issues
your pity,
makes me feel like ****

we all have our bad days
so forget it, leave me alone
i don't need your pity

only if you knew
what my life is really like
they you'd give me so much pity
it would overwhelm me

i may loose everyone
i may loose everything
just don't feel pity for me

I'm glad i was forced to say goodbye to you
I'm glad i had to
i may have missed you before,
i will never miss you again

you turned evil,
you turned into a witch
more like a *****

we parted at just the right time
i no longer have to face you
i don't have to deal with you,
and all of your ****

you were simply a *****,
you are mean
you were extremely mean to me
and now, you're not my problem

you're gone
I'm gone
i hope you miss me,
cause I'll never miss you

oh look,
its a *****!

bring a sledgehammer
i know you're going to break my heart

you broke me,
you broke me so easily
i'm broken
and its because of your ignorance

you ****,
i hate you
your the worst

why don't break my heart too?
you already broke my trust
so finish me off

bring a sledgehammer,
bring an axe
bring anything,
just break my heart
but you've already done enough to **** me

**** me,
break my heart,
you know you want to

effortless,
i'm in free fall
i can feel the gravity,
i can feel the wind, the warm air

i fall to my death
i'm going down
i'm falling deeper into darkness
how did it get like this?

i keep on falling,
i can't save myself
there's nothing around me,
just a pit of darkness

i can't get back up,
so i fall
i fall  for what seems like forever
and then i'm gone

i'm tired of your ****
i'm hot from anger,
i'm sick of life's crap
i'm sick of you

don't you know?
my heart is bruised
its not because of her,
who abandoned me
its not because of those,
who hurt me,
it's because of you

sure they hurt me,
but it's nothing
its nothing,
compared to what you do
you make me hate you

you lied to me constantly,
you don't care for me at all
you bring be down,
you hate me,
i know you do

what kind of person are you?

i know i'm hurting,
but i can't do anything
i know i'm dying,
but i can't save myself

i make steel walls
i brace for impact
my walls are impenetrable
you won't even chip it

you think i can trust you,
you think i'm fine
you don't know
how close i am to taking my life

why do i sit in a corner?
why don't i have friends?
cause, i may die soon,
that kinda depends

"depends on what?", you say
depends on if i mess things up
" you did nothing wrong" you said
you say that like you really give a ****

you thought we were close
you thought we would last
well kiddo,
that's a thing of the past

in a world of happiness,
i always frown
when everyone out there has friends,
i'm just the loner

leave the loner be
i'm gonna die anyways

you were a joy to be with
i smiled and laughed every time i was with you
you helped me when i was down
you picked me up off the ground

it was never the same again
you found someone better, someone new
together you did all the things we used to do
you laughed and smiled all the time
you opened your hearts to each other and shared everything
but you didn't know what that did to me

you're still in the picture" you said
i am, but i'm in the background
"you're still my best friend," you swore
i was your second favorite, never the less

when you gain one, you loose another
with that, you never seemed to be bothered
you just lost your best friend of 7 years
and now, we are only peers

there once was a girl,
a girl that always sits in the corner
no one cared about her
until....
she was gone

funny thing is,
people don't realize how much you care about someone
until there gone forever
they didn't know they liked her,
until she left everyone's  life's

you may wonder where people who commit suicide go,
heaven or hell
no one knows
they may still be in our hearts,
near or far,
i'll tell you one thing,
they didn't leave you by car

they didn't just leave you though,
they left everyone on earth,
they left earth its self
they aren't coming back

there not living,
there not dead
there not anything,
but our gone "friends"

she was the girl,
the girl in the corner
the girl that didn't have friends,
the girl no one cared about

no one knew her name
we barely knew she was alive
none of us took the time,
just to say hi

if someone talked to her,
if we were nice to her,
maybe we could've saved her life

it was too late
the corner she used to sit in is empty
people now know her name,
she committed suicide

we were all to late

i want to ask you one thing,
what is love?
what did loving the wrong man bring?
just a husband you want to get rid of

i can't tell them about what you have been doing
it would **** me to see their reactions
you knew there were suspicions brewing
next time think about us before you take actions

is this love?
is defying your life, your husband, your kids love?
you think you're all high, mighty,and up above
you lying all the time, is it worth it?

i know you,
i now know how horrible you are,
you are only creating more and more scars
hope you know,
this will never be forgotten

make your choice mom,
keep on ******* this horrible man,
keep on being the horrible person you really are
or stay with us, stay with me
stay apart of our family

pick your choice,
the man you think you love but just ****,
or the children that don't know you well enough

mom, is being with this man love?
if him cheating on his wife you is love,
i never want to find it on my own

you, my mother are ****** up

i can't continue to struggle
i can't continue to hide
i can't deal,,
with my miserable life

can't you see?
i've made mistakes
i ruined my life
i can't face the pain,
not one more time

i know you don't realize,
they way that i feel,
i want you to know,
my feelings are real

i hope that you'll be happy,
when you notice that i'm gone
i'll be one less person in the world,
that has to "stay strong"

i'm so sick of lying,
so sick of hiding it all
that's why i'm leaving earth,
before i have to spill it all

don't try and safe me
i'm already gone

why did you let me go?
why did you let my heartbreak go?

why did you leave me out?
our relationship is done without a doubt

why?
do we all experience heartbreak?
why did you make my heart ache?
what was the point of all the risks i take?
i guess i didn't know i would break

why do i still hold on?
i'm still standing in front of you
i always stay strong
why aren't i crumbling in a ball?
and now, no one will break down my walls

so, please, tell me why
why did you have to lie?
why did you poison my heart?
why did we fall apart

just please, tell me why

how did i turn to this dead end?
how did it get this bad?
there's no turning back now
i have no where else to go

i can't go forward,
I've already been to far back
how the hell do i get back on track?

there has been no questions answered
no apologies accepted
no smiles
nothing but silence and heartbreak hovering over me
how did i get to this point?

it all started with heartbreak
all of the risks we had to take
I'm followed by this haze
wondering, when will i get out of this maze?

i made my decisions,
i wish we could have a revision
i turned left on this maze,
and still,  for you, I'm crazed

your voice blares through the speaker
my soul is getting darker and darker
i can't stand it
but i know i can't quit

with every step,
it feels like i have misstep
the torture is getting worse
its like I'm cursed
and i know the end
is not near
get me out of here

I'm stuck in this heartbreak maze
i hurt in so many ways
its all because of you
how was i supposed to know that you're love for me wasn't true?

i hope you're happy
because i am unhappy
I'm going to die soon
from my big heart bruise
i hurt way too much inside
the pain will never subside

who knew heartbreak could ****?
i know you're having a thrill
don't be happy much longer
soon enough, your guilt won't make you any stronger

so here i am,
stuck behind these walls
i know you don't care at all
i sit here and give my last brawl
how did our love ever fall?

i hope you got what you wanted,
now I'm gone

i am prometheus
you are the bird.

as i sit here chained,
i can't control what happens,
i can't end this torture,
i can't end the pain

and now, day by day, you eat out my soul
i know you enjoy it,
you live life and laugh,
making fun of all my pain

for i am prometheus, ain't that so?
or maybe a 15 year old girl hurt by an old foe
i don't know
all i do know is,
why can't you just stop?
stop eating my soul out,
stop torturing me

can't you just end this my zeus?

its like a plague,
it spreads through my body

first, my head,
first it crawls into my skull, causing its poison to clip in the cracks
and then the poison seeps into my brain, making me feel like everyone hates me
it kills my nerves,making my emotions go away

then to my chest
it travels down my spine and around my ribs, crushing my ability to breathe
and it clogs my arteries, getting closer to the source
then, it finally gets to my heart, breaking it instantly
at this point, i am to broken to utter anything, i stay silent like a winters night

from there, it goes down
it kills off my liver, making me scream ****** ******
it makes my kidneys shrivel, making me fall
stays inside the intestines, making me hurl and *** my pants
i am nearly dying, but it still goes on

its poison is to much, and i die

its the day that the loneliness poison finally killed me
at least i won't be lonely in hell

what do you think when you read the word heartbreak?
the ever constant ache,
all of the smiles we have to fake
all the pain we have to face
when are we going to close this stupid case?
the thought of them in our mind that takes so much effort to erase
it will never end

as the days go by,
you can't help but cry
it is so hard you would rather die
you don't know that good people do drop by
and with the heartbreak, the time never seems to go by

but you did nothing wrong
so why are you the one playing all the sad songs?
being the one who can't tell right from wrong
there's no way your going to move along
maybe the pain is life long
nothing else can go wrong

at this point, life may ****
you feel suddenly life your love is out of luck
you will no longer be love struck,
the pain just seems to ascend
and it never seems to end

what heartbreak means to you may be different to me,
you may see it completely differently
but heartbreak is still heartbreak,
no matter how much pain you will face

just stricken by pain

heartbreak road has no end
you really need a friend,
but you just lost your best friend

home:

my house is hell, its the fiery pit we all call hell.
my family is the devil, and I'm its victim.
the "devil" likes to throw everything its got at me making remarks and pointing out everything I do, just making me remember every second of my pathetic life,  that my home really is hell.
I get home from the prison they call school and get off the bus to hell, not expecting what the devil will do to me this time.
my devils see who I really am as a bunch of lies.
they question me as a person every single day.
I have to face not one devil, but three.
I wish I could avoid all of my devils, but hell, I ain't gonna get rejoice in my lifetime.
I have made no decisions that would put me in heaven nor in hell when I die, but I live in hell, I learn at hell, and I deal with the devil day by day of my life.
there is no god in my life, there is no light at the end of the tunnel; its just a dark inferno hell.
you may question the decisions you make all the time because it may be the difference of heaven or hell, but that does not apply to me, I already live in hell, and there's no way I'm getting out of the devils wrath.
the smoke of hell chokes me, leaving me to gasp for air when there is no mercy.
to me, hell is like Harry Houdini ready to escape from his magical glass box, only that I'm not Houdini, so there's really no way of escaping.
I am trapped, suffering from the lack of water and air. Houdini had it easy, he could actually escape.
but unlike him, there's no way out of hell.
the devils take your soul and with the touch of there hands, the piercing stab of there words, insults, arguments, it turns your heart cold, limp, lifeless, numb.
but home isn't my only hell.
day by day; I live in a personal hell being mocked, ridiculed for my mistakes, just torn to shreds
. every step I take is burning the soles of my shoes; my feet.
no matter how far away from home I am, I'm still in hell

trust is filled and spilled,
its lost and gained,
its stolen and given
and still, i trust no one

every single time i trust someone,
they hurt me
so why do i trust at all?

somethings are broken,
but sometimes,
they never get fixed

how do i trust someone,
when all they ever do is hurt me?

its like a loop,
it constantly terrorizes me,
at first,
i don't trust you, out of fear,
out of insecurity,
but then i let you in,
ever so slowly,
and then, when i'm not noticing,
you turn it all around,
you hurt me.
you hurt me over and over again

when i'm done with being hurt,
i move on,
just to find someone else to be friends with,
to trust,
and then to get hurt by all over again

i thought at 15,
your supposed to learn how to cook,
how to go out in the real world,
to prepare for college or your future
but i'm not learning that,
i'm learning how mean people can be

so, Kayla,
Sarah,
Haley,
Kelsey
Miss Shaddock,
and now Emmaliegh,
how do i trust again?

all you ever did was hurt me,
was it really that hard just to be a good person?
why did you hurt me?
i thought i could trust you,
now, i trust no one,
and that's because of you

for months i have been ready,
I've wanted to give up
i feel like life is not worth it,
like there's no point in trying

people say all the time,
"don't give up on your dreams."
do they really know me?

i've been in my own boxing match for far too long,
i'm struggling to fight against myself
its almost time for a knock out
cause i'm done, and the fight is over

i'm not fighting to be happy
i'm not fighting to keep some person in my life,
i'm simply fighting to stay alive

since the day i turned to the dark
since the day i realized i was depressed and alone
since the day i started high school,
I've been a fighter

but.....

why fight when your gonna loose?
why run when your not fast enough?
why sing when you can't hit the right notes?
why try to keep it together when you know you can't?

is it worth it to loose the fight of your life?
is it worth it if you are in last place?
is it worth it if you never get a solo?
is it worth it when you are going to fall apart?

is life worth it?

honestly, why did you have to do this to me?
why did you leave me here?
why did you hurt me when i was already hurting?
you knew i was already in pain
when we fought it made it worse

after all the memories that we had
i watched our friendship fall apart
every single thing, gone
when we argued it just made me cry
is this really worth it if were just gonna continue to fight?

that's when i decided to end it
that's where the letter came in
it was to say goodbye and only goodbye
you looked at me with those brown eyes
then i knew, it was the right thing to do

every single day without you is bad
i told you that
i really wanted you back
i wanted back all the memories that we had
not the fights or the pain
not  my eternal suffering
i hold the key to our friendship in my hand
its my cell phone
one text to you brought me back to life

but you never replied
do you even want this back?
after everything i've tried to keep myself together
you just ******* off
maybe you don't want this at all
i thought i could forgive and forget but i cannot
maybe we weren't meant to be
that's why there calling a friendship recall

I think about you every single day
I miss you way more than I miss being happy
Sure, we fought allot
but is that worth all my pain and suffering?

All the tears
All the anger
All the pain
Was that worth it leaving you?
I don’t know

I lost myself last year
I got caught up in my own pain
I never even realized,
What it would do to you

I sit there in class
And I look at you
Thinking, is there anything I can do?
But yet again, will we fight?

The one thing that's holding me back
Do I have the will to go back to you?
Most importantly, do you want to
This is your choice

I know I was stupid
I know I was wrong
All those letters, I lost myself in them
I wish I could fix that

Can we fix what’s broken?
Will you trust me again?
Can I believe you won’t hurt me?
I don’t know

It’s too hard to forget the unforgettable
The past is never the past to me
People told me to move on, forget about it
I told them no

You mean way too much to me
I can’t live another second without you
Give me a chance to show you, I’ve changed
Give me a second chance
I’ll do anything
I would die to have that chance again
You are my everything

If you say no, I’ll cry every night
If you say yes, things will change
I had to leave to back then, it wasn’t my choice
And I know, deep inside, you would come back
That’s just who you are

Some people tell me to stop
I will never stop
I’m nothing without you

Please forgive me, for everything
I was wrong
Nothing was right
I can’t stand avoiding my friends because of you
Forgive me, please