in the forest
my heart hangs heavy away from you
the light pushing it toward all four corners
of the earth
your hands reach out
but it hangs, motionless

who am i to say that this will end?

the pause between words
before they leave your lips
the moment you could have chosen
to do the right thing, but you didn't.

i could paint pictures for you
until all of my paint is dry
adding water until the colors are gone.

i can slowly become nothing.
a piece of a story. the piece that is forgotten
as the book goes along.

when i lie down beside you
blankets become that
same
old
fear.
a divide so wide between us
a space that cannot be filled
your eyes wander but i'm still here.

throw it all away. where are your hands. i ruined you and now i will pay for everything.
your heart was lost. mine was young. worried about never changing. always being last and never first. if i could bleed out onto you i would.
if
if
if
if
that kills me and you.

all of the parts of her that i can never be
my karma. sealed fate. i did this to myself. planted seeds i couldn't dig up. you say you love me but

things will never be the same now. five years rewound. fingers chasing after the old me. grasping in the dark for who i was before you. and you. and you.

"now i cannot lie in that bed."

the season has passed.
winter's long pause lifted from your lips.
i loved you more then than i ever will.
your sun-starved skin, milk glass arms
shimmering like stars in morning's first light.

remember when you kissed me like there was no one else?

you are summer's longest day.
apollo, the light is yours and you are mine.

lay your body down on the
sun
soaked
ground
and love me again.

love me so long until i have forgotten
the slow passage of winter.