everyday it's a round about way
to everything that's exactly the same
i haven't slept in days
not including eight hours everynight
thats how it feels at least
what's the point in sleeping
if resting is nonexistant
my body doesn't collapse or deteriorate but
my mind never rejuvanates
it's useless for me to be here if i can't give the situation
the proper attention i deserve to give it
i haven't selpt in days.

i'm going to curl up now
and pretend you're here
not sure if you'd help at all

it's just that
at the end of they day
i'm not sure what to do
and i'm tired of this ****

and at the beginning of the day
i'm not sure what to do
and i'm tired of this ****

it's just that...

sigh.

there's no one out there like me

that's for **** sure

you want to give love
i want to know it 　

you're solid with in numbers
i expect gravity to give　

you've been hurt
i haven't any faith in reality　

you've lost direction
i've got our compass 　

i'll promise you this
if you carry me piggy back
i'll point us where to go 　

be my landmark
i'll be your force
we'll nourish each other
piggy back.

dear Life,
i take vitamin c with chicken noodle soup
cause i need a double boost of immunity to you,
Life, you're virus-like
slow and steady persistant stream of attack
on my will's white blood cells,
eventually wearing me down with:
     term papers,
      lies,
      paper cuts,
      and a nicotine addiction
dear Life,
i got a triple boost of immunity today
i drank orange juice with my vitamin c and soup.
HA.

all the classics
on the radio
your hand in mine
smiling, cruising interstate sixty-five
and then it played...    

i got you, babe
          i think    
i got you, babe
         i hope (because)
i got you, babe
          i think i love you
...babe

i walk a line
some where between listening to myself
and listening to God...
if i truly believed i'd burn in hell
i suppose i wouldn't smoke that chronic i bought
and if i truly believed i'd burn in hell
i'd probably do my homework,
stop saying "****"and make sure to not flirt with men that weren't mine
picture this weekend scene;
saturday night, basement
drink in hand
smoke inhaled as clean and clear as everyday air
i would tell that nice boy
with the lip ring and name that starts with a "b"that i was taken by a special man
and ... and..excuses....
let them go let them roll as smooth as bacardi straight from the handle
bought at the local CVS by a bought-off ***
i guess i'm a girl that believes in hell on a bad day
when all bad things
poverty, homelessness, grandma's cancer and stubbing your toe
comes in the form of your dorm roommate
drunk at two am hollering and arranging the mini fridge,
when all the bad things feel as though they affect you directly
and if i truly believed i'd burn in hell
i'd be the girl that appreciated that remembers there's a merciful God
twenty-four seven always
but realitywho forgets
that life is a mystery
i write and it flows
and i know that these words are exaggerated because my conscious knows
i never miss a lecture, and is faithful to the one beautiful boythat actually gives a **** the day after
i'm the girlthat smokes a bowl
and worries about her soul
picture this weekend scene:
alone with a man
gorgeous and caring as could ever be
frozen lake front
wrapped in his arms,
perfect any teen girl couldn't want anything more
but unhappiness rests in me
it rests in his arms, sure neglected for a day or two
but this girls knows
clearity in mind strength through living empirically
and if i truly believe'd i'd go to heaven
i'd stop letting my worries write these ****** *** poems