I love the little details
That decorate
Your body
Like fine art, gone unnoticed.

Midnight talks,
Spinning words like
Wheels burned out on pavement.

The days are good, but the nights are cold
and there are always gunna be things out of control
Cant pay rent, but I can pack a bowl
Sometimes I'm sad, but it's not all that I know
Your heart's only as heavy as your mind defines,
you can't keep on your foot on the brake when its time to drive
You gotta rise up
and be floored just to floor it
sometimes life hurts but you just gotta ignore it.

I still know
Exactly who you are
And just who
You were.

There's something so soothing
About the tick of my pocket watch.
It reminds me of my grandfather
rotting in his grave
And the difference between
Feelings in the air.

Darling, I am just a painter.
What more could you want?
There's no more that I desire
Than to watch these colours rot.

Charlie Sorrow shattered,
And we scraped
His broken bones.

Two weeks ago
The longest trip in my life tapered into calm reality.
Three years of
Craving
And crying
And loving you
The 'sick' way ended.

If you knew about my P.D.
And how I still undertake a fifty hour work week.
I graduated early.
I even smile a strangers now, dzia dzie.
We still miss you.
I still hurt.
But life got better.
**Actually ******* better

You wreak
Of blood.
You muderer!*
I only hurt myself.

I'm halfway between a dream
And reality
What's burning?
Just a tiny thought.
Not even for a second.
*”Hunny, you are.”

I don't like when he has ****** hair,
It irritates
My sensitive skin
When
Our lips are sealed together
Like passionate secrets in the dark.

Be careful, my joints ache.**
At your age?
He laughs
I look down
And fiddle with the edge of my skirt.
Yeah, my sister says I was born forty.
I smile to myself
As he shakes his head,
Always unsure on how to handle
My explanations.

I miss the
Wisconsin sunrise.
The taste of crimson skies
In the moment just between
Drunk nights
And mornings.

My mind is a flash of memory,
I laughed as the blade makes light of pretty skin
I caught bullets before they passed my teeth,
And dripped blood as cost for my silver tongue-
*Ecstasy, you torture me.

I remember how nice it was
When I played the drums.
It resonated
Deep in my chest
Loud enough to hush
The parts you used to dwell
As a sad memory.

Spin me stories
like leaves
that I can kiss and pull off
of trees
that flourish
or are withering
because both fruits have
so much value
to me.

I miss when my poems
Were laced with political emotion
And my rhymes rang true
To the tune of societal revulsion
When my veins felt like burning cities
And I craved diverting from man
I guess people all have moments
When they turn away from where they used to stand.

We came with the rain,
Down the boulevard-
It's safe to say this year was pretty hard
We buried sons with stars
And my Grannie
In baby blue pjs
With Uno cards.

I keep dreaming about sweet-ice
And her being in firmly
Pressed, clean as a whistle
Clothing.
Her insulin dispenser
Gone,
Like how logic goes
When we're together.
Beautiful,
As always.
And for some reason
I think about
The scars
And soft skin
That rests so sweetly
On those lovely bones.

You always slip away,
like dirt within a drain,
Like a knot above the doorway,
like the hurt before the pain,
You resign yourself to irony, resign yourself to rest
Like knives beneath my pillowcase,
*Like daggers in my head.

Sometimes I see a
Jackal
With yellow-orange eyes.
It looks at me expectantly,
Like everything does.

Lazy hazel sparks
At the sight of you,
Stretched out like the trees-
You told me.
*They reach for stars in the same way
You used to reach for me.

I wish your lips gave cancer
Instead of what you took from me,
I'll admit, I was your *****-
But at least I'm not your current cheat.

babe, just get me bottle.**
She's driving,
He's kissing his pipe.
she pleads,
And my body aches.

My sadness is an ocean,
My smile is the shortest line.

We watched the sun rise
painting rainbow streets
in the color of surprise

Oh, God-
Can you not ******* frozen lips?
Even if I was Chirsts bride,
Hell would still have me on its list.

I love like layers of
Dust
Slowly covering everything.

Cute kids
With skater hair
No longer interest me.
I like
A bit of slightly less ******
Mystery.

The birds outside
Screech ”gris gris, gris gris”
And I think it's a great suggestion.
I wouldn't mind an amulet
To protect or give me luck.
Even if it didn't work,
Something to hold would be enough.

I showed up
Already drunk.

Little loveless Juliet
She sits and burns another cigarette
While thinking of new ways
To push feelings far away.

I don't like when people
Call me 'Ann'.
I like to think that my name is pretty simple
It's just two letters
Set up like a mirror.
A N N A
It shows that you are lazy,
Or trying to
Be too personal
If I'm not worth the extra
syllable.

My tongue's in knots,
My heart is ice.
*Violence sells-
But so can I.

Because
It's easier
To believe in
A good ****
Than
True love.

If I cant get rid of this sickness
Ill be dead before I even get the chance
To ******* dreams
And notice that things aren't as bad as they seemed.
Im just so stuck in this mindset
And the ghosts I can't forget
Reaching for anything I can
Just so I don't have to deal with it.
So ashamed,
so caught up in a game
I invented
But can cope enough to play.
Tell me souls can change
Hell, you could tell me anything
'cause **** starts feeling real
when you describe the way the night feels
And the pain my breath instills
when I try to give my everything
But can't find my own free will

”Tell me how you feel,”*
And I didn't say a thing.

go home.
silence
Go. *******. Home.*
Fire licks its way into my aching bones-
bones that feel years before my time
and feet below the floor.
the door slams. I am in a stupor. A truck pulls out
Ice splinters in my veins-
begs my body- pleads-
no more centuries to endure.*
Blistering skin screams,
cracks,
bleeds.
and now, crawling on the kitchen floor,
gasping through shrunken lungs.
Laughing,
Freezing,
Drenched.

Look at me*
Tremors wrack my
Tense,
Paranoid form.
There's nothing wrong with you.
My mouth hangs slightly open,
And I believe the man
Who waits patiently
within my head.

I am a porcelain doll
My small hands are fragile,
So I let no one touch them.
I try not to blink
Because my eyelids scraping against marble
Is a sound that unnerves me.
I am a stop animation film
In my first language
Twisting tongues.

I'm drawing ships
And skeletons
On the first blank page
While I drink to
Anything that suits a sip-
Which is everything at this stage.