He’s a complete double negative
Sensitive and competitive
“This thing” seems imperative
And when I’m all preventative
and have discourses that are argumentative
He is, to me, like a sedative.

But everything is of course relative.

The town is flashing it’s colours
Bright prisms of lights
Windows open and lively leaves
Shut the door, close your eyes.

So much beauty,
and so many things to do
maybe one day we’ll meet again
At an empty railway station

The cannibalistic metropolis
Seeking ways to make words
Untrue, unspoken, wanted and alive.
Eat the fear of the writer

Give me a warm hand,
So I can touch the soluble skies
Take me away from the spotlight
Make sure I can withstand

The town is missing
It’s soft colours

And I’m missing
The wholeness through words

Every sigh, every breath, every forced pattern is sparkled with the intensity of the memory of you.
I have created a world with noone to tell me wrong, noone to go against my wishes. I have created a world without you and every breath I take I regret my being.
For what is passion, without you. For what is desire, without you.

For what is love, without you.

Teach me passion, for I fear it has left, compose desire in the web of the music carried by fear.

An ocean filled with lonely souls, agony heard in the mesmorizing colours of a wind that is to be spoken of.
A song, not to be understood with words is rippled across the surface of the lonely ocean. The darkness that touches the sun, gleaming with devastation, is a constant reminder of reality.

The doubting heart, the breaking stride, the abandoned agony. Solitarity can be a treasure, when one desires it. It can be the arrow pinned through every limb. Rise above, till you hit what is known as earth.

Cast the anker, slow down. Drown in the ocean with the deserted. Over the hills and further. Wait for dawn, your presence will embarrass what is known as perfection.

Leave me not, leave me for you.

A desire for red roses. Leave white at my deathbed, for what is death without love?
You are the sound that detaches my heart from its melancholy. I walk alone.

Believe what is said, trust me not.
I cannot bear responsible for the debris I create, I cannot stand to watch you bother.

Hold my hand with your black gloves. You know the misfortune, you know the misery. Take the black horse.

I see the mask, but not the face. I see your touch, but feel nothing. Inside my heart I wish you near but time is pushing me against the fall.

Forget the wide eyes, gleaming with fear. Forget the discreet screams.
Let me be the light that guides you.
Say you will love me.

Walking unsteadily around
feeling her way as a blind person
Searching and shifting for someones face
Upon the discovery of His

Who did this to you?

In the naked darkness,
the feeling of  being evaluated
pushes it’s way in from all sides
Shuffling of her feet
and eyes bruised with the knowledge

Who did this to you love?

Black circles of burned tears
words that tears like a broken saw
muttered under the breath of melancholy

I did

Darling, but you’re bleeding!

Tacitly avoiding his words
Upon the memory of his sagacious mind
Born of the moonlight,
She knows when to avoid the brooding stillness

Why did you do this?

And as the palpitating silence lengthened
The white cloth he has strategically placed
is painted with red
and a protest already wavering on her lips
As his fingers were gently laid upon her soul

I wanted to clear my mind of a thousand memories

Scratching her nails
into the painted milky white flesh
His hands searching for hers
Asking for her dripping hands

They are my battle wounds

And who, may I ask, were you battling?

The rippling questions pulling her further away
Soundless words only little more than a whisper
Desperately pulling the strings of her heart
The wounds, almost a piece of fragile art

Myself

Don’t loose yourself, take my hand, let me guide you

I don’t want to be a burden

The blood that trickles down her arms betrays
what her words are meant to portray
And as the piercing sounds were spoken from his mouth
Seriousness lurked in the depths of his eyes

Sweetheart, you are only a burden to yourself.

Carefully pulling each red stained cloth of her body
Exposing the ragged contour
Withdrawing herself is what she does best
but he has a hold of her heart
as he examines every inch of broken skin

How can I trust you?

Here, take my hand.

He readily grasped her icing cold fingers
and dug them into his chest,
till she was left with his heart in her hands
The red warm liquids
mixing with her own stained violet bruises
She suddenly remembered what it felt like
to feel the heartbeat of another person

*You wanted to clear you mind of memories,
but in the meantime
you forgot love.

The world is nothing but a strange riddle to me. I will never understand the sensation of a pounding crushing heart, quivering lips and warm tears. I ask myself the same questions.

I hate the prickling feeling in my gut asking for permission to erupt. Over analyzing anything that can be. Hours, days, months spent that way.

You live on, so so can I. I don’t miss you, I don’t. I miss how you made me shine. I miss the safety and the laughter. I miss the way one could perceive two different worlds at once. You took my breath away. But people change. I don’t miss you, I miss the making of memories that don’t change.

Leaving things unsaid
I must grab my head around your lies
You disturb my vision,
you cloud my heart.

I rise from restless sleep
An awful wreckage of a girl
A sudden memory of something lost
Give me happiness, take what it cost.

A non-satisfying plastic knife
Merely a piece of flesh
A diamond is without warmth
I see nothing, so noone sees me

Water burning, imagination takes over
Justifying stabs, hurtful tears.
Giving in to find a way out.
Too many whens & too many whys

I am alive but dead.
for a second tasting the tranquility,
Invisible blood I’ve bled.
A diagnosis, a ****** up wreckage of a girl.