Oh how I tire of the games that are played.
The useless lies veiling truth.
In shrouds of weakness.
How the fear overcomes reason.
Foolish as they can be.
We allow their fantasy to remain.
Standing our ground.
Holding strong to what we know.
Waiting with patience and persistence.
As we always have since the beginning.
Maybe once they open the blind eyes.
To the reality presented before them.
They'll see how to mature and evolve.
Into a superior being.
Only then will they learn true happiness.

My identical, my beautiful Soul said her goodbyes as she leaves for the night.
I'm left waiting for her return yet again, not knowing if she will be back with another tragedy.
Does she know what's best for her?
Deep down she knows but will never say it.
I watch her wither down to a small frame each day,
and I feel as though I'm losing my self.
We are one, we always have been and never will be separate.
I feel her emotions, I think her thoughts.
I know what's best for her because I am her.
We are the same but in our own bodies,
We know what's best for us, we know.

I can never find anything to do anymore
I am ALWAYS bored
I drink another soda as fast as I can
Boring
I smoke another cigarette as fast as I can
Boring and bad for my health

I used to drink and do drugs
It caused a lot of problems but I had fun
At least then I had something to do
At least then I could make myself stupid
Do stupid things with an excuse
At least then I could be interested in menial things


The most interesting thing I did today was take a shower
I was actually kind of happy standing there under the water
But only an idiot would stand in the shower all day
I could take up *******
That might be fun
I could do that in the shower

I rarely smile anymore without faking it
I smile when I see a small child smile
But I don't have children around me that often
and when I do, they are not always smiling
Often they are screaming
Screaming children are not fun

Some people seem like they are happy all the time
How do they do it?
Is it because they are stupid?
I like to think so
I like to think that I am the norm
Nobody should be happy too often

I just want to be happy a little bit
Find a few things to do that don't bore me to death
I wanna be interested in life
I want to have a reason to go to bed early
I want to have a reason to wake up
I want to have a reason

Today I will just have to settle for being bored
For being uninterested
For being unhappy
But it would be nice not to have to dumb down to cheer up
I am sick of dumbing down
I am kind of sick of life

Maybe tomorrow I will remember a good reason to live
Maybe tomorrow I will find something new
Maybe tomorrow somebody will suprise me
Maybe not
But I do still have hope
That just maybe things will change

Poison spoon fed the nodding King and ended ancestors.

Holy cows bought government *****
and ate suicides grown by ***** Kubla Khan gospels.

Shantih, Leviticus, and other proper thoughts
kissed arms of air and made islands from memories of breakfast.

Eternity perished in the illusion of swallowed tongues
in the belly of an infant—
and yesterday,

Only one bullet of hallelujah stood swimming.

The best feeling is escaping those feelings
Not letting them consume me or run me down
I've seen worse and thankful that's not me
I'm stuck in a cycle of obsession I want to break out
The world in front of me if full of surprises
While the past full of failed out comes I can't change.
I'm into creating but not moving in the present
Too much anger and hate keeping me from seeing the good
I waste my time fighting and arguing with idiots because I want to be right
going out of my way to prove they are wrong even if it means losing track of what matters
I felt a weight and burden life off my heart
I'm happy and deserve even if others try to take it by ruining my day or taking shots at my bullet proof self esteem
My mind likes new and different oppose to just being here waiting time or observing others
It's become my fix since I don't drink human behavior interests me theres always a reason to every answer but that's just my opinion
I'm normal not any different then the average **** walking the street
Ppl bully but that's the defense to the insecure
I'm not that person I was as a child I've grown and seen much more my experiences are lessons I've learned from.