i never drank to get drunk
but at times
i got drunk as i drank.
wondering why i drank...
i recall
a friend who never saw 44 at all.
Ft Lauderdale spring break
so pretty and sweet and petite
who could have ever seen
what a few
would eventually do
to you.
at least 3 rehabs
Betty Ford counting among them
you recounted how many
spoke of all the chardonnay
that finally got 'em.
at times i envied your easy life
or so it seemed.
new home,
new sheets and towels
bright white carpet and all.
successful husband
diamond jewelry
art on the wall
mercedes benz
and money too.
no worries about bills
to pay
jobs to get
love to find.
but i liked your VW beetle much better
and your painter's pants on you,
so chic and popular at the time.
your so sweet a nature
honest and true
generous and all.
blonde and adorable
the years took their toll.
i never knew the pain
you were going through,
you never told.
what an education
you did give,
when finally you
revealed
where you had gone,
where you had been.
tales of hidden bottles,
drinking on the sly,
hiding and covering
all of the lies.
the cops couldn't believe,
you could still be alive,
with a blood alcohol level
of 4 point 0.
how we grow strong,
build up the tolerances,
until they amaze and astound
each and even every one of us.
the years and the glasses,
caught up with you,
the first place you begin to bleed,
or so i learned,
when your liver goes
and starts to harden
and your blood can't flow,
is through your neck and throat.
blood transfusions,
they
helped for awhile,
then one night.........
well one night...
that was all.
a cautionary tale...
for all you college bound...
you never know which one of you will be the one...
who never sees your next sun
the next sun's light.
inspired by Derek Devereaux Smith's 2015 Wine Party. Derek's piece scratched at an old memory... his is sweet and moving and fraught with possibilities and hope.. and somehow it pulled me into thinking of someone i knew and loved. in memory of my sweet and beautiful and talented suffering college friend. you are always remembered & i shall see you ... hmm perhaps fairly soon.