so this
this is heartbreak
feeling everything
and nothing

stop talking about what i'm doing wrong
stop telling me guys like it when i smile and when i keep my hair long
stop telling me guys don't like too much makeup but you should at least wear some
stop
stop talking
about me
you have a family to run
as you often interject in unrelated conversation
stop telling me you're sorry i haven't found the one
you might be someone's shadow
but i am the sun
i am hot and i am fuming
and i hold solar systems on my own

i will never be tidy
you will never be
able to wrap me up
and stick a big red bow on me
i am crumpled tissue paper gifts:
i am a little belated
i will always have fly-aways
in my hair
and makeup
smudged under my eyes
i have always been a mess
and a little crazy
trying to clean me up
will only make it worse
you see,
i will always be friday night
and you,
will always be monday morning

you were a creature of habit
and i was trying new things
it almost felt automatic
like i was waiting for a ring
on the phone
on my finger
i would have loved both
but everyone knows
creatures of habit don't
find new homes