Alone against the world.

She stays up at night watching the moon and the twinkling stars.

Be careful, they say she thinks about everything.

"Goodnight," I say
as I close the door,
and the boy leaves my apartment.
I slump against the door,
my boney back poking into the
undulation of the door.
I regret everything.
Again.
This isn't the first time,
that this has happened.

Why do I do this to myself?
When he told me,
he loved my body...
it helped fill the void a little.
But those words,
were empty,
just like my feelings towards him.

I'll do anything to fill the void.
I'll do what it takes to feel pretty.
I'll do what it takes to be called beautiful.
Because that's what matters,
right?

And if I lay down my head,
yet again,
maybe I'll dream of you.

Because seeing you in my dreams,
is better than not seeing you,
at all.

Everyone said this would be hard,
but I didn't know...
that losing you
would be losing me too.

Because when you left,
you took a part of me.
The best part,
when I was happy.

Here's to you my love,
I miss you so.
I'll see you in my dreams tonight,
I'll never let you go.

You know you're alone,
when you're surrounded by people,
but feel empty inside.
Or when you sit down in a class,
and nobody wants to sit by you.
Both are different,
but the same.

When you post on social media,
and nobody cares to respond.
When it takes all of your courage,
to talk to someone new.

When you wake up,
and know that nobody would notice,
if you just disappeared.

Because
its
late
at
night
and
I
need
someone
to
save me
from
myself

Kiss my sadness away
Tell me
Tomorrow's a new day
Please oh please don't go away
Or else I don't think
I'll be okay

Help
There's someone on
My chest
Sitting there
Laughing.
I can't breathe
Struggle for air.
I'll soon be gone
If I don't get help