Around, all around,
the sinister creatures gather.
My dread grows
as the dagger of life falls
against my heavy heart.

It wounds me,
and slowly my
essence drips
to the thirsty earth.

In a strange and terrible frenzy
I flee! while doom looms over me.

Now alone,
my fervent plea falls upon deaf ear's.

This is my doom,
my last plea,
nothing can save me
but me!

©2018 By Amanda Shelton

I once fell from the sky,
only to be awakened by the fall.

I opened my eyes to find
my bedroom wall's
where there the whole time.

Dreamers can imagine,
but writer's can imagine
and relate to the dreamers.

That's why we write and read.

Inspiration is the key
to imagining great things.*

*© 2017 By Amanda Shelton

Gentle winds blow through the trees,
as the golden light from the day
glint and shine.

A reminder of the cooler sessions
before the heat stole it's time.

The land becomes dry and hot,
as life pushes through its waves,
it survives.

The sun seems like a burning blaze,
and I am its burnt egg.

~Burning summer blazes away~

© 2018 By Amanda Shelton

The shadows can't hide my pain,
in the still of the night you came.

This burning turns into
a nightmare, I am running from
the blazing flames of pain.

I have no time to rest,
I have no time to play,
I have no time to think,
I have only pain.

Very rarely do I get a break,
this life is like a 24 hour job,
I always have to be ready to fight,
I am always ready to go.

This pain takes me under
pulling me under toe,
title wave after title wave
I am gasping for air.

Slowly getting heavy,
with each passing moment,
this pain sits upon my chest
trying to break what I have left.

Still I live,
still I give,
still I keep breathing through
the painful waves that try to steal
my well to live.

Nothing can steal my well to live,
for it grows stronger with
every push and shove,
I just know when to give
and when to pause.

This painful life I live.

© 2018 By Amanda Shelton

Sometimes creativity is
a drowning victim
gasping for breath.

In the end a work of art is created from a life lived
on the edge of life and death.

Paint and ink is my blood
and the canvas is my flesh.

I am aware and capable
of expressing it through
my heart and scars.

I burn for my art and poetry.
It never flickers or dims
as long as I keep bleeding.

For I am a victim
of my creativity.

I lay myself down for my words
to devour my flesh and bones
to feed and hydrate my art and
poetry through my expression.

It's like a forest of dreams
that grows like weeds,
my mind is rooted
piece of artwork,
written and drowning
in paint and ink.

I am of all colors and shades,
I am a book with millions of
pages and saga's waiting to be
red and viewed.

©️ 2023 By Amanda Shelton

“Play the poem like a song long forgotten, it blew away when the wind decided to play but poetry will never forget me, for I write poetry.”

**© 2017 By Amanda Shelton

You see me
yet you don't see my brain.

My brain functions at a different
level it's wired like a backwards
motherboard, I started life
in silence and frustration
slowly growing into a hurricane
of communication.

Speech is lacking in my brain
but still I learned how to speak
through my ability to write poetry
and understanding languages
you probably can't speak.

My eagerness helps me to develop
and grow.

Routine and schedule is my
favorite thing to do, it feels good
to stick to a straight line.

Noises and lights hurt my eyes
body and mind, causing painful irritation to grow and
poke my mind.

I've had to grow up inside this
painful design, it's been hard
and deep gloomy and
sometimes fleek.

I find my autism stylish
and unique, it's full of awesome designs but also darkness
that seems never ending.

Like everything else I have
bad and good times too.

I might think like a cat
but I am still human by design.

This is autism and me
my backwards life.

© 2019 By Amanda Shelton

You stole my heart
as well as my security deposit.

You grew your lies upon
my womanly intuition
as it grew like bonfires
lighting up the sky.

I knew by looking in your eyes,
you are drowning in your stories
of disguise, (You are not a spy).

You might try to hide
but you are like a cat,
everyone can see your
wiggling ****.

I know a thief when I see one.

© 2018 By Amanda Shelton

Yawn! stretch and paw.

Oh, how I knead you,
purring to heal you.

My pink nose and whiskers
tickling your toes,
I knead you like dough
paw and purs I know.

I love you so.

I’m always the
cutest trend.

The internet loses
its sanity, sharing
my face as I wink
and shake.

Like a chubby loaf of bread,
I’m perched on your head
on your keyboard and bed.

You have no privacy,
for I am always kneading
you cuddling and puring.

I’m running ahead,
chasing shadows and
a piece of thread.

I know when you are
sad and sick, I pat
you and do cute tricks.

I share food and love
as though we are equal.

My love is unconditional.

Sometimes I seek attention
I tease by breaking things.

Meow, at the screen,
cat’s rule this scene.

I knead you, meow!
purrty please adopt, me.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

The rose's grew thorns
deep in my heart,
leaving wounds.

Fear choked my roots,
as my rose's wither
and rot.

Within the shadows of
my dreams lives the ghosts
of perfumed memories of you.

It grew teeth and black,
it grabs me as I fall asleep.

You're memories are monstrous
and causes anxiety to pool
inside of me, as I feel like
I am drowning within its
emotional tides.

There you left me to die,
teasing me with outreached
arms but you gave me nothing
but smoke.

I am withered from the
storm of you beating
and weathering my heart
like shivering leaf's
in winter, I am left
in the cold.

You're a gaping wound
in my side, a thorn that
keeps stabbing me.

You are PTSD.

©️ 2023 By Amanda Shelton

She’s got diamonds in her eyes,
she glistens and shines.

Through the night I don’t
need the light for she shines
for me.

Like a candle in the window,
she’s the stars to my sky’s.
We travel far and wide on
the wings of our imagination
and we fly like smoke upon
the night air on strings of
poetry.

She brings me my muse,
ideas abound as the moon
smiles upon the night my
heart swoons with gay poetic
delight.

Poetry is her name, she’s my
muse and inspiration. In the
depths of my lonely nights
we fly together and I forget
I am alone.

Poetry follows me everywhere
I go, like a shadowed muse.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton

Let me help you step through
the looking glass so you can
see what's on the other side
of me.

I am a survivor!
I will not be silent any longer.

This is me pounding on the post
yelling at my ghost.

Leave me alone, why don't you take
what you came for?

Why don't you leave me and take
everything so I can start over?

I don't need this abuse,
you have nothing but excuses.

I am not the failure, you are the
damages that follow my every step.

I am a survivor! PTSD is my struggle.

©️ 2023 By Amanda Shelton

The sun is rising and my mind is hiding, bring the cold inside and calm the flames before they consume me.

Blistered skin, swollen rashes,
sunburn stings like a thousand lashes.

The possibilities of me turning into ashes, is upon the breath of morning.

©️ 2024 By Amanda Shelton

From the gaping wounds I escape,
from its painful thrubs I leap,
relief is found in formatted sentences
and bleeding ink I smudged upon these pages.

For you to leave this page empty and
confused is to know I failed
to write a good poem.

It takes a master to draw you
in, it takes skills to paint
with words like an artist
paints with brushes.

Years of research and experience,
builds a masterful piece of work
and expressions.

Time dosen’t heal alone,
it needs help along the way.

Line by line,
slowly I build my rhyme,
it grows like a flower slowly
blooming into a beautiful tapestry;
complex and designed by a poetic
mind.

My threads are heavy, easy to read
and to imagine my story.

The simplest words and softest lines,
can build a tapestry so beautiul it
burns in your mind for a long time.

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

We birth nation's between our thighs,
I grew confidence in my experience,
I am proud and brave,
I fight with poetry as my sword,
I am a woman and poet.

You fell in love with my poetic format,
I make your heart beat quicken
and shake as words flow
from my lips.

I am a woman and poet,
My digital quill quivers and
stains these pages we create.

I am a woman and poet
of the digital age 2018.

© 2018 By Amanda Shelton

I am a Poet,
I have the ability to
paint images with words
and formats.

I curl your mind onto a window sill,
with my wordy tongue I bring
you stories and rhythm
as I play my poetic drums;
I help you to relate to
my words and actions
through word play
and dancing format (poetry).

You are important to me,
you are my fans
and my inspiration for
improvement.

I drum, drum, drum as
I strum, strum, strum
my poetic tongue,
pulling at your mind
as I play my rhythm
a string of rhymes
playing with my poetic chimes.

I am a Poet.

© 2018 By Amanda D Shelton

With a twitch in my step
and a stutter in my brain,
I am autistic but I am
also a person with feelings.

Give me order and I will be happy,
push me off the road and I will
struggle to get back to driving.

I have been fighting
but I also have been
living and enjoying
my life.

Being brave comes easy too me,
but being bold can be a task
like lifting weights, though
I am willing to try new things.

I am not a stranger to anyone,
I make friends like a pro
though I twitch and twist
I over communicate and
speak my thoughts without any
boundaries of my own.

At least you can trust me,
I don’t tell lies for I don’t
think about deceiving anyone.

I want honesty and straight
to the point, I would rather
stick to a line, move slowly
and carefully through this lifetime.

Patience is my gift,
kindness is part of my design,
both are woven into my life
like a tapestry that tells
a story.

© 2018 By Amanda Shelton

I have seen humanities
shadow dancing beyond
my dreaming eyes.

I’ve seen clouds of gray
fade into white and blue
skies.

I’ve seen death and life,
babies birthed and the
sick die.

I’ve seen night turn into day.
The moon danced across the
sky until it slowly slipped
behind the earths curve.
The sun stole the spotlight
with its larg yellow *****.

I have seen computers rise
from the minds of geniuses.

The phones evaluation
from dieling the operator
to receiver into cell phones
capable of fast processes.

I’ve seen the environment
slowly die by human hands.

I am hoping to see a future
free from racism and discrimination.

Better healthcare and education
for all.

Better justice systems
to serve and protect our
communities.

My vision for our future
is two possibilities.

We will prosper and grow.

Or we fade slowly into
the vast spaces we’ve
been searching from
the beginning of humanity.

Our greatness is holding on
by a single thread of hope.

Peace, love and change.

To become great we need to do
all three. Until then we are
but fading stars chosing to
go out like a tiny spark.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton

I had a lucid dream last night.

I dreamt I was a star,
I dropped upon the earth
scattered into millions
of pieces.

From my shattered pieces
I soaked into the dirt
and from my tears of sorrow
I birthed a black rose.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton

Breathe they say.
Think, why don’t you?

It’s like a lost breath,
it chokes you until
you are reminded of
your place.

Like a **** it
grows upon your
grave, a memory
of your pain before
you lay down within
its frame.

The dirt piles up
within your brain,
as you chew on its
fibers left behind
for you to grind
and favor.

No one will starve
if we ate mindfulness
and drank the stars
as they fall like rain
drops around us.

Mindfulness likes to
play, as love stands
bravely, and boldness
is a breath away.

Save us! from the pain.

© 2019 By Amanda Shelton

Change is good,
sometimes it’s for the best.

I have made myself what I am.

I have lived for 36 year’s,
I have fought for my life,
I have struggled through
in the toughest times.

I always came through,
I am able to see the light
at the end of the tunnel
because it’s always burning
waiting for me to arrive.

You know you are living your life
when you feel the ache settle in.
It means you are no longer busy
and you have the time to notice.

I use to be able to run nine miles
twice a day, now I am learning
how to rest nine to five.

Life wasn’t promised it would be easy or fair.

No one told you,
you don’t have too work
to get there.

Life is work, tough, and struggle
it’s up to you what you do to get
where you want to be.

Just remember you are not alone.

Just like the flea
the dog is its whole world
until he has too leave.

We don’t like change
because most view it as negative,
but the truth is; Change helps us
to grow, stay strong, and to learn.

© 2018 By Amanda Shelton

Inspirational and dreed,
we puke up our word's
unit nothing is left.

Poetry is dead,
for we've rubbed it raw,
broke it down into the tiniest pieces.

Now we poets have to prove our right
to call ourselves a poetic crime.

We write it out, draw the line
slowly bleeding what we define.

Our fingers are raw, red,
and bleeding ink,
since dying for our format
is a true crime.

Poetry is dead because it's stuck choking on my mind.

© 2018 By Amanda D Shelton

I once was a traveler wishing to be free,
but time slipped through my fingers
like sand in an hourglass.

Now my age and suffering has come
to a crossing, in between my strife
and short lived life lies the future
and freedom of my personal possibilities.

I am like a caged bird longing for
the wind to blow between my feathers
so I can be free and fly above
the horizon of my dreams.

Here is where I set fire to your minds
and inspire your imagination,
through my words and expressions
I am free like smoke from a candle
left to burn in the window of my
poetic vision.

Aw, and here lies my beating heart,
below the open window panes
it is beating for you, it waits for you
to read the lines I've designed.

I know I beat to a louder drum
than most, my flame is hotter
than others, but my moment
has always been now.

For I live for the future
and dream of the past.
And so the past is nothing
more than a memory, and
the future is now.

I have hope that my vision will see
beyond this haze and I will leap into
the possibilities that I am searching for,
only then will my mind be as warm as
my heart that burns hotter by the minute.

This is kindling for my flame,
I feed it with my poetic shavings,
from the past I came and into
the future I blaze.

I have left a candle in my
poetic window so all who gaze
upon this page will remember
my name.

Amanda, Amanda where aret thow?
Where have you placed your poetic tongue?
Have you forgotten the vision?
Is there poetic justice?

I'd like to imagine that the crimes
of a doomed poet is nothing more
than ashes and ink smears smudged
across your screen.

I the poet, none has been forsaken
nor forgotten, for my heart will
forever yearn for a garden
to plant my poetic blossoms.

Here I have roots and a personal domain.

My mind is set free through poetry.

No cage can possibly keep
my inspiration from leaping out
and catching your eye.

I am a poet forget me not,
for my words are yours to devour.

©️ 2023 By Amanda Shelton

The couch shook as the thunder cracked rearing across the sky.
My heart fluttered with excitement
as my back felt the shiver.

As the wind is blowing the trees
are forced to bow and sway.

The rain is pouring like a flood gate
opened from the clouds.

Electricity is in the air, the storm
is brewing within my poetic mind
and outside.

As my sorrows ponder on the
weather.

©️ 2023 By Amanda Shelton

I am one of the shadows
growing in the dark
surviving off the grunge.

Rot and decay visits
me often, like two old
friends we have coffee
and tea every morning.

I reflect on the
coming weeks as today
fades away.

As I awaken dawn comes
walking through my door
as if invited.

I would rather live in the
sunshine cruising on
the beach barefoot in
a cotton gown that reachs
my ankles.

The sunshine likes to
bite me leaving red bruises
upon my skin. I still go walking
even though it leaves marks
and possible scares.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Boom pop woh yeah, meow buddy
just like that twitch to the left
now **** to the right. Real quick!

Like a robot doing the twitch
and a pop with strings,
tug on that.

Tourettes got me twitching,
hiccuping and meowing.

Muscles cramping and joints
are grinding, creaking and
popping, like microwave popcorn.

2 minutes to go!

Anxiety's on a roll,
the embarrassment is a monster
stabbing me in the back.

I don't even know who I am waving at.

Why am I doing that dance
in the middle of nowhere?

Did I see a cat?

Do I have the hiccups?

Nope it's tourettes!

©️ 2023 By Amanda Shelton

How does one see past the murky
waters?

I am gasping for air
as you watch me struggle,
I can sense you are there
seated upon the shore.

You push me under before I have
time to grab another mouth
full of air.

As I come up again
you are relentless you
make it harder for me to
climb ashore.

My heart is laying beneath
your feet, you have left
it bruised and beat.

I will never win against your
sin, you are blinded by your
mind’s broken eyes.

You accused me of nonsense
with no fairness, you don’t
give me a chance.

You judge me,
you damaged me,
you push me until
I lose everything I hold dear.

You don’t care,
you don’t see the love
I have only for you,
I haven’t left you,
I haven’t hurt you,
you still don’t care.

There is nothing I can say or do
to open your eyes, that’s up to you.

I will be here setting in my tear’s,
remembering the good times we had.

Like a dream our love faded away
upon your lack of measure it slipped
from my lips.

All you did was watch me scream,
I LOVE YOU! While I died underneath
your blind eyes.

I LOVE YOU!

How does one see past the murky waters?

I hope this is but a dream.

© 2081 By Amanda Shelton

Until it happens to you
you won't know it won't be real.

Just listen and see the truth,
no victim is invisible unless
you turn away and say nothing.

Don't blame the victim,
some weren't even conscious.

When they say no that means
go don't stay and push the
button.

Bruises are not always on
the skin, the scar's are not
always visible they grow
from within.

Sometimes I am screaming inside
reliving my damaged life
over and over again.

Don't blame the victim,
some weren't even conscious.

I was dead inside bruised and
beaten emotionally damaged.

For seven years I fought
until I was exhausted
and done, I felt unwanted
and scared.

The paranoia is still here,
it's always lurking in the dark.

A noise or touch can make me jump.

The constant reminder he's been here,
lurking in the dark ready to pounce.

His perfumed memory turned into a
monster that kidnaps me in my sleep.

His corrections and accusations
cut me deep.

Leaving emotional lashes on
my heart and self esteem
its raw and painful,
making it hard to sleep.

Don't blame the victim,
some weren't even conscious.

©️ 2023 By Amanda Shelton

The heat rises,
heat waves roll over the street,
car's rush by with engines
roaring, burning smog,
we choke upon.  

Summer is on the rise,
cooking the desert like
a pro chef cooks a good meal,
We fry.

Summer is on the rise!

© 2019 By Amanda Shelton

Is there anything that can be done?

My body lays here,
in shadow and time.

I like everything else,
I become dust.

The sun grows old,
slowly it’s going to grow cold.
Like a death star ready to burst,
someday the night will consume
everything we built and us.

In ruin the stars will remember us,
as we scatter about like lost souls.

This life,
this time,
this ruin,
this is dust
and ash
left behind.

A deadline beyond my control,
slowly reaching it’s cold hand
grabbing tightly too my soul.

This life,
this ruin,
this dusty disaster we call
living is always moving.

Without asking who’s in control,
who’s driving this beaten path
to ruin? All we see is dusty trails
leading nowhere fast.

These barren land’s reach out for miles, like God’s hand at the end of the mile it welcome’s all with open arms and smile.

If you could look me in the eye
and tell me I will never die,
I know that is a lie.

Life never promised me perfection
nor happiness and success,
no it’s taught me how to
work it out with
the best of my abilities.

This is ruin,
this is life,
this is time,
this is the end
of a new beginning.

© 2018 By Amanda D Shelton

Across the vastness of space
my love never fades.

Like a star it grows,
expanse, and tames
the space around its shape.

The universe knows that love
makes things grow,
it feels the vibration,
as we fall in love.

Molecular structures weaken,
only to rebuild.

love never dies
it just goes on vacation.

**© 2017 By Amanda Shelton

What lights my flame like poetry?

A kindling to my fire,
an inspiration to my blaze,
poetry blew me away...

P is for perfection.
O is for opportunities.
E is for excellent.
T is for textures.
R is for rare.
Y is for you.

Poetry is perfect just the way it is. It can bring opportunities to all who write its formats. Its an excellent way to express yourself. Also its full of textures. It can be rare if written well. Its personal, sincere and true to you.

© 2018 By Amanda Shelton

Upon the rising sun the pain
arrives riding the rays of light. As the painful fog
migraits settling upon my
holiday cheer, like a shadow
monster ready to devour
the hours I cherish.

Upon the arrival of October and November, migraines and cluster headaches come for a visit.

Into the core of my eye drilling deeper over time,
blindness slowly devours
my vision as time beats
with painful rhythms.

An hour passes as the light
breaks through the fog, my
vision is restored as the pain fades away.

Ocular migraines are
nothing compared to
cluster headaches.

I’d rather suffer through the
Ocular migraines than have
a month long battle with a
painful stabbing behind my
right eye.

This is a ocular migraine,
but cluster headaches,
are the most painful hours
of my life.

There’s no treatment nor
cure for headaches and
migraines.

We are forced to suffer through the process.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

It’s a night of warm summer
beams, a time of change
is in the air, past seasons
greets us with their kisses.

The heat stirs,curling,
foggy wisps of rain.
Shrouds of wild flowers
cover the ground.

A midnight dream of ashened
trees, and realities part
slightly, to weaken the
other seasons making way
for summers beating heart.

Now a day of brooding sun,
I go down to the river
where it’s warm and green
for there is where spring
lays down for a nap,
I promised her a farewell.

© 2019 By Amanda Shelton

Us poet's collide with the shore,
with our expression and
drawn out breathes.

It's like the birth of a star
but it's too dimly lit at first.

Until the galaxy gets ahold of our word's.

It pulls and tugs on our poetic tongue's forcing explosive expression to burst forth, and here we are.

Upon my suffering you sat,
like a **** on a string,
you pull and tug on me
until I fall apart
at the seams.

You stole my heart,
you stole my security
and claimed it as your
domain.

You blame me for your
actions as if there's
an excuse for your abuse.

You start out kind
and generous but
you ask for interest
even though I've given
you my deposit in full.

You turn our relationship
upside down, you want my
full support but never
give me the same
instead you leave me
underneath the ruins
of our damaged relationship.

I work hard to keep
our relationship stable
yet you break the table.

You don't bring me
stability and care,
instead you just stand
there expecting me to
move for you.

I've been neglected
in my time of need,
for your games and
depression.

You have replaced me
with your shadows and
controllers.

You treat me like you
have no need for me,
as if I never was there
and my feelings mean nothing.

You run circles around me,
you are always too busy,
you act like I never
said anything, or
I am not there at all.

My tears land on the ground,
for you are never around to
catch my pain.

My heart aches for
the time you will finally
be supportive and show me
the love you claim to have
for me.

You don't seem to hear me,
even though I am screaming.

© 2019 By Amanda Shelton

I compare thee to a soft breeze,
but you linger on my memory.
For you claimed me with your kiss,
you captured my admiration in
your jar of forget me nots.

Love devoured me,
stole my heart and
my feelings.

A memory of long ago
but still today you linger on.

© 2018 By Amanda Shelton