It starts with an idea,
it grows in silence in
a darkened mind.

The idea starts to fade,
drowned by suffering and
pain.

The darkened mind suffers
in silence and bruised by
abuse, pain settles in
vain.

Like a wilting rose the
villain grows its rot devours
the soul with its rooted decay.

Then it goes for the kindling.
Choking the light from its burning
flame. Until all good has evacuated
like smoke.

Nothing but a cold candle remains
and burnt petals that once was
soft and vibrant full of life
now ashes are left.

A villain is made from a mold
created with suffering from within
darkened silence. It baked inside
a dark mind hardening its heart.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton

Watching the waves rolling in
the depths of darkness,
the water glow’s with a neon
green and purpose.

Rolling
rolling
rolling, deep.

The darkness fades as the dream
shakes, you wipe your eyes
from the crusty sleep.

The dream break’s as the crust
falls from your vision.

Rolling
rolling
rolling, deep.

Crawling on your belly
digging for possibilities.

The mud piles high,
thick like black slime
oozing from your mind.

Don’t do this, you’ve got
so little time.

Move they say, be smart but
don’t be proud of it, be
ashamed of yourself don’t
be mad about it.

Self abuse is like an itchy sore,
it’s annoying, damaging and
deep.

Rub some salt into it,
feel the burn.

The seasoning of life is spicy
rich and crispy.

Reality knocks at your dreams
door, asking for directions.

You slowly wake to shadows
hovering over your head,
they stair deeply
into your eyes.

Than you become aware it’s all
in your mind.

Watching the waves crashing.

Rolling
rolling
rolling, in the deep.

It’s your mind staring
glaring from your dreams.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton

Tears are my friends,
they release me from
the ******* of sorrow
and depression.

I don’t cry often,
I have to be very upset
to want to cry.

It’s painful because it uses
all of my muscles.

Sorrow is a strong emotion,
like a seed it plants it’s
roots hydrated by my tearful
release upon my plotted life.

Its needed to learn how to
cop with the ups and downs
of life.

Cry me an ocean so I can
learn to swim, dive and surf.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton

A miracle is nothing to ignore.

Like a grain of sand blowing
in the wind there is another
traveling on the same breeze
as yours.

With so many paths to travel
a crossroads is possible.

A dream is not but a dream,
it is reality within a sleeping
mind. For the brain knows nothing
of its woes when traveling through
its clouded dreams.

Until the mind awakens miracles
happen.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton

Innocence is lost when knowledge is found.

A child is always learning,
so does that make us children
even when we are 40?

At 40 my path has become weathered
but still I find pieces of myself I thought
were useless, yet the pieces helped define
who I am.

I never lost my innocence because
I am ignorant to the outside world,
I have tried to walk amongst the population,
it's scary confusing and shady.

People are selfish and too busy,
I'm always aware and never too busy
to see the bigger picture.

I watch people thumb around bumping
into each other but moving on like
nothing happened.

You zoom by in your fast cars and airplanes,
you are loud causing pollution and forced
shoving and attention.

I think most are not aware of their own
reality, some people move about as if they
are shadow Ninja's fighting an invisible war.

I'm like a fly on the wall, I watch but never talk.

Am I broken or is the world broken and
I am walking amongst the ruin's?

Autism separates us.

I don't know if I ever will
understand your need
for attention and pollution.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton

These chains are what defines
our relationship.

I want to lift the heaviness
light up the darkness, release
myself from these chains.

Love, you chained my heart
now I feel trapped, I’m
wiggling free I’m crawling
out from the darkness.

My fire is a spark but
it only takes a spark
to restart a heart.

So watch me burn brighter
than before, these chains
are no more.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton

I’ve suffered for my youth,
I’ve discovered who I am
but lost myself along the way.

I’m finally at a crossroads,
I am finally facing it.

My river flooded,
my roots are overgrown,
my hair is turning grey,
the wrinkles are not going
away.

My crack’s are getting deeper,
my hair is still losing color,
my blood pressure is getting higher,
my pain is settling in for longer.

Ageing is a bit! with a
bat and ball, it beats you
until your blind and still
expect you to hit a fastball
and reach home plate.

©️ 2022 By Amanda Shelton