While musing over the past
I feel lost in the fragments
of the memories of you.

You stole my dreams
with your lies that you
love me.

I regret nothing but
holding on longer than
I should have.

Our love is a shadow
a memorial of past pain
and struggle.

I have learned how to
stand stronger, how to
love myself and let go
of expectations of
unforgivable love.

In the end I am no longer
held back by your shadow,
I am stepping out into
the light so I can ones
again shine.

You should be ashamed
of yourself for dimming
the lights so you can
steal the spotlight,
because we were meant
to be a duo sharing
the light.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

My dreams use to bruise
my ego, until I learned to
let go of my ego and reached
for my dreams instead.

I replaced my fears with
passion for life and
the ocean doesn’t have
to calm down because
I learned how to ride
the waves.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

I use to be just another
shadow amongst other
shadows, until one day
I decided to step into
the light.

I grew so bright,
my flame shines like
the sun, you will never
lose my vision for it
burns within your mind.

So many times I have
ran from my fears,
I got tired and decided
to give up and
start a new life.

I allowed doctor’s to open
my head to implant a device
that gave me freedom, I never
knew before, I learned how
to fly and grow my life.

Upon my new found wings
I choose where I go
from here.

I have a lesson for you,
forget what you believe
you are capable of doing,
let go of your expectations
and learn how to join me
within the dreams waiting
for you.

The freedom of acceptance
is a breath of fresh air,
you will feel like you
are flying upon a breeze.
Like a leaf floating on
the wind, you choose
where you land.

Just don’t forget to keep
climbing, and get back up
if you are falling.

A brave person knows when
to rest, a bold person knows
you have to sacrifice to
succeed and move forward.

You know what I sacrificed?

My fears! The one thing
that held me back for years.

My life is blessed because
I love and I wanted to share
my passions with you.

You are the reason I fight
to live my life. I want to
be an example to show all
of you what we are capable
of doing.

You choose if your life
is a hindrance.

We sacrifice our dreams for
society but you don’t have to,
you are a unique, beautiful, living, intelligent being.

Your choices dictate
who you will be.
So be free!

I got brain surgery,
faced my fears so I
can be who I wanted to be.

I am an autistic woman with
a rare movement disorder,
my IQ is 200, and I never
forget.

I don’t want you to forget
how special you are too.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

You brought greed and pain
to my door, broke my heart
and stole my food and pills
you left me in pain and
to starve.

With no remorse you stole
from others too, you lie about
your purpose and support.

You are no ones friend,
you’re an abusive judgemental
dude you manipulate, behind the scenes you say horrible things
you are not honest and clean.

You even accuse me of being
abusive when I have done nothing
but change my life to stop your
abuse.

You lied about your apology,
you haven’t changed anything,
you still use people and drugs.

Why would you accuse a
handicapped person of
doing things they are
unable to do?

You are the only dishonest
person here, no shade do I
cast, for my soul shines only
for Jesus and I never show
any kind of evilness.

You can ask everyone else,
I am honest and loving.

As for you,you have no stable
ground to place your blame
on everyone else.

I have no blame for
I don’t do shameful things
or accuse others, I keep
to my home where my chair
is placed and my cat rests
beside my legs.

I have seizures and pain,
my autistic brain keeps
me busy and my sanity
stable as well as my faith.

You don’t support my sanity
and faith,you gaslight
everything until I second
guess myself.

You called me the liar
while you did drugs and
stole from everyone else.

You play your music that
causes me seizures,you
turn on your devices
after you told everyone to
turn off the lights, so
I can feel better.

You make excuses
to judge others when its
you whose doing bad things.

You have no one to blame
but yourself, no one hurt
you or caused you suffering,
you’ve abused yourself
before you met everyone else.

I have no problems but what
you bring, I worked hard
to build my life above the
pain and suffering I’ve been
forced to endure.

You’ve never supported me
or made me feel stronger
and beautiful and like
I am a beautiful queen
by your side.

You’ve made me feel unwanted
and ashamed, you made me
think I am insane.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Upon the pieces of my
broken heart I shattered
into fragments of our love.

My wounds leave scars,
left in my jars of past
broken dreams you broke
with your passionate tongue,
you promised me forever,
I got thrown away and
tossed to the side instead.

Your words saturated my heart,
until it burst at the seems
releasing my broken dreams.

I might not be able to
fix the future of our
love but I am able to
move on and build
new dreams.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton

Maybe the program isn’t just
on the TV or computer screen
but our minds are the static
between the senses?

Your reality is not what controls
your actions, for you’ve been
given many different roads with
different views and people to meet,
so you are the programmer building
your code that dictates your direction.

God gave us freedom of mind
meaning you decide how it goes
and what you do is up to you
so use it wisely and you will grow.

Design a program that functions
well that grows from the roots
of your dreams.

Don’t expect happiness for that
grows from deep within and your
ability to let go, and you never
had full control, for life was
here before you were born.

You are your own faithful friend,
and others come along the road
of life, embracing their own
tapestry of code.

©️ By Amanda Shelton

Today is a new day,
refreshed and clean.

Every second is a new,
it’s unique because time
is always moving forward.

It’s like a ladder with
no way down, you are
forced to go up, up, and up!
until your body degrades
into soil.

You are recycled into the Earth,
if you believe in God you will
live on forever in heaven.
So be faithful.

My love goes out to all
who suffer.

We as humans are built
to fight and survive.

We fought so many other things
and came out stronger and
smarter, that’s exactly what
is going to happen again.

This can be good because
this is how we survive,
this is how we prosper
becoming stronger through
the struggle.

What living being can make
vaccines, computers, cell phones,
and sew like we do?

We have a responsibly to keep
the world alive because we are capable.

© 2020 By Amanda Shelton