just when i feel
as though i can't breathe
as though i'm about to fall
as though i've hit rock bottom
the impossible happens
things get worse
the weight on my shoulders
it gets heavier
my palms
they get sweatier
my grip loosens
i can't hold on much longer
yet some how
i'm still holding on
still fighting
trying to be strong

i promise you
you'll make it through
you've got a whole life
ahead of you
don't let it
go to waste
you've got a bright future
and a beautiful face
don't end it all
because
you want one phase to end
keep fighting
and push through
you'll make it out alive
good as new

can't breathe
body burning
chest on fire
heart in flames
no oxygen
no breathing
no sounds
no speaking
nothing but
a heart barely beating
burning hot
burning cold
then just cold
stone cold
numb
frozen
suffocating
not from lack of air
from lack of love
lack of life
lack of will to live
lack of happiness
a puzzle in which
i do not fit
suffocating
but not by pillow
not by blanket
not by choice
the things i cannot control
are the things
that are slowly killing me
suffocating me
no one to help me
no one to stop me
no one to save me
no one
just me

warm face
burning soul
heart on fire
heart stone cold
lost
insecure
dying
on the floor
your words
they hurt me
the pain
sharp as a knife
no cut
no scar
no blood shed
no skin torn
just the freezing
of my heart
and the burning
of my soul
never again
shall i be whole

your mask
has peeled off
along the edges
i begin to see
who you are
your true colors
your dark
betraying colors
you say
you mean no harm
but harm
is all you do
you hurt
and torture
the people you "love"
you **** them
over
and over again
i don't understand
how can one ******
the ones that they swore
they would unconditionally
take a bullet for

what is this
i'm feeling
i'm suffering
dying slowly
but i'm unsure how
is this what suffocating feels like
unable to breathe freely
unable to think clearly
unable to speak confidently
or am i drowning
unable to catch my breath
unable to swim ashore
unable to save myself
too far out for sure
too far out at sea
too far out of reach
too far out to be heard
silent and helpless cries
"save me"