Of course I miss you.
I'll never find another love,
Like the one we knew.
Sometimes I wonder,
If you miss me too.
If we could forget the past,
And start anew.
But then I remember,
All the ******* you put me through.

A waste of my time,
Spending hours watching windows,
Watching cars go by, that are not you.
I wish I knew,
That when you said you would be here for me,
It wasn't the truth.
Can't you just stay in my arms a little longer?
Wrap them around me,
Just a little bit tighter.
Give me a reason to believe in you.
Everyone around me uses youth as the excuse.
This is basic math,
Follow along.
If you add a promise but omit an end result,
Subtract honesty,
And add blatant disregard,
You end up with one.
Two minus one is just you.
Tell the truth.
I see right through it,
My brain sees the deceit yet,
My heart keeps on believing it.
"You will walk through my door,
You will not leave my bed tonight."
It only takes a little consideration to make things right.
I won't keep up the fight,
For attention. Not tonight.

I have immersed myself in you,
Plunged, Submerged, Consumed,
Gasping.

Looking through a focus of,
Jealousy and hate,
I had lost sight in what is real.
Finding truth in a person,
Isn't what rage reveals.
She looks at me with desperate eyes,
Screaming to herself,
"Why?"
The world is never what,
You expect in the end.
To look into the enemy's eyes,
And make a friend.

To laugh with you again,
(A stranger called a friend.)
Wipe the cobwebs off my soul,
And recognize myself again.
I see such a light in you.
Sometimes I think you see it,
In me too.
It's hard to say,
In between this time,
And space.
But I try not to step,
Out of my place.
You have this way of making me,
Forget my ways.
But it's so nice to laugh with you,
These days.

I could have loved you.
It's in the back of my mind,
Every time I see that name,
Or hear that song.
Instantly I'm taken back,
To when we were young.
You smiled at me,
And I knew what it meant,
But I was terrified to love you.
I was terrified to try.
I didn't want to ever,
Have to say a real goodbye.
Then-
That night when the streets,
Were quiet,
And the rain was soft...
My world was crushed.

I ran to you,
Your door was locked.
But you saw right through,
And one look was enough.
Where would I be?
Where would I be, if we,
Were one?

It isn't something you can change,
With words.
You look at me as if,
I could possibly change,
Anything and turn it,
My way.
But you have to know,
I've loved you every single day.
How much I missed that half smile,
Dancing on the edge of your face.
And the sound of your voice,
It's home.
Something they will never know.
And the days turn night,
Summers turn cold,
The world we have shifts,
Until the day you do as you're told.
Addiction like a suction,
Absorbed and concentrated,
You morph into,
Fragments.
In, then out of my door.
I count the moments in between.
The way you yell, and,
Every time I scream,
It's such a beautiful thing.
This sick game of parenting,
You've played onto me.