I'll keep praying for you,
even though you don't want me to.
Just because its in your nature to quit,
doesn't mean its in mine.

You say, "we're only put here to die."
There is nothing I can say back
because deep down this thought
always occurs in my mind...

for fifty
dollars
you
park
your car
inside
one
of these garages.
I drive and drive and drive, knowing
that I will not have a place
outside those garages.
I spent fifty
dollars
on a purple v-neck, orange crew cut
striped shirt and ten socks;
it was my birthday money.
I’m going to go inside
restart the laundry
so it will be warm.
My apartment complex has speed
bumps before each module
to slow the traffic
and as I go over one, looking
at a darkened figure standing
in the garage, taking
a plastic bag from their trunk—face obscured by darkness--
I realize what a crude portrait
humanity is.
Trapped on this prison
planet—what was our crime?
In that moment, bobbing head
I thought of love
and how unobtainable its object is;
then I realized
only people who pursue love
are capable of murderous rampage killings.
I thought about how safe my anonymous
neighbor
was
and how lucky someone would be
to know what saints walk among them.
I forget that my bright shirts were bought
to attract someone so
I could attempt to love.

It feels better to be falsely imprisoned
--to be a saint--
than to know ****** and love
are parked inside of you.
The dark figure takes out
whatever's stopping you.

The ghost of things
I never  said
keep me up
while I lay in bed.
In the minutes
that come before sleep,
I ask myself why
I never took the leap...
Of all things I am
One of them is not bravery,
in fact, to my demons,
I am in slavery.

****, this pizza's good*
Shut up Nolan, you're high.

Your shirt was missing a button
and I couldn't help but notice
but you told me I was pretentious
so I pretended not to see it
but all day long it bothered
me and I couldn't help but stare
at the way the fabric bunched
and nobody seemed to care

Smoke dope, eat soap,
Fly away in a bubble.

I am dreaming
About trips with him
To the mountains
Which are tearing the sky
We would walk on those endless serpentines
And I would dream for the sky to cry
Because then the rocks would become slippery
And he would hold my hand.