In this day of technology and social media,
Our worst fears and flaws emerge and are ripped from us,
Displayed for the world or strangers and friends to see.
We open ourselves,
Pour out our everything,
Hoping for a like,
A comment.
A sweet and innocent compliment is mistaken as "thirst,"
Men and women are victims to it's grasp.
All creeds,
Races,
Sexualities,
Religions.
All giving in to the grasp of self doubt,
Waiting with face pressed to a screen.
Hoping to feel validated,
Loved,
Or ignored.

The hopeless romantic in me seems to be dead,
Gone and buried.
I used to care,
Swoon,
Write poems,
Make sweet gestures.
But that is all but gone,
Or just seemingly lost.
I used to carry myself with pride,
But I seem to be a shriveled husk of my former self.
I'd give anything to feel the flutter of butterflies,
The beat skipped in my heart,
Just losing my breathe,
One more time.

I found out you were leaving today,
Going on a new adventure without me.
Then the bottom fell out of my stomach,
And my heart filled with remorse.
My insides are screaming don't go,
I've tried turning off my feelings for you but I can't.
You made me forget the world,
Forget my pain and sorrow.
If I were to bump into you tomorrow I'd break,
I feel like you are running away.
I know,
I've been trying to runaway too.
I just want to say,
Don't go

She is perfection,
Wrapped in an enigma.
With passive aggressive undertones,
Shrouded by brilliance.
She is the dew on morning grass,
So thick and hard headed.
Molasses filled blood stream,
Slowing her heart to a crawl.
She is everything I want,
Hazel eyes filled with tears.
Looking for a way out,
Walking away from the world.
She is,
No longer mine

I had the world on a string,
All within my hand,
But I grasped too tight,
And my love slipped through my fingers.
I thought I had it all figured out,
But I dwelled too long on my thoughts of the future,
And I lost sight of the present.
Now I stand here alone,
Tears in my eyes,
Hiding behind a mask with a smile.
No one needs to see my pain,
My broken heart.
I feel so lost,
A wandering hermit shall be all I am known as,
Feeling only like a failure,
A hero,
A prince,
No longer.

Lust for a taken woman.
Wanting to unleash my carnal desires,
Ravaging her softly.
Willing to sin,
Corrupt a friendship.
Destroy lives.
I am no longer myself,
Giving in to the flesh.

Taken from this world too soon.
A tragic end to a just flourishing life.
On your way to being a champion rider,
A cowboy.
Cut short in the screech of tires.
May you be at peace my friend,
Guard us all from the evils of the world.
Until we meet again,
I miss you.

She stand before me,
Skin caressed by the soft moon light.
Her hazel eyes,
Dancing like the stars above.
Mesmerizing,
Electrifying.
This beautiful woman before me,
Is everything I have longed for.
She stands within reach,
All I have to do is reach as well

Why do I care so much,
When I feel as though I've moved on?
I've found someone better,
Someone who will give me the time of day.
But why do I care,
Why do I try?
Love and be loved,
I love and get nothing.
Not an ounce,
Not a drop.
I'm better off alone,
Forever alone

To lay under a sky so blue,
Watch the clouds stroll on by.
A dog,
A horse,
Cumulus,
Or stratus.
Waiting on the sunset,
As the fluffy white monsters absorb the colors.
Radiant reds,
Or subtle pinks.
Troubles all washed away,
Laying under the sky.

All I have to do is open my mouth,
And everything is shot to hell.
I babble like a brook,
Diarrhea of the mouth ensues.
I do myself more harm than good,
Especially in the presence of a beautiful girl.
I should learn to not stick my foot down my gullet,
**** block my attempts at a relationship.
Nothing but my worst enemy,
No one to blame but me.
I need to back off,
Maybe disappear.
Or just shut up

Night falls softly on her eyes,
Tears run down her cheeks.
She fears she is alone,
Abandoned in this life.
No soul to turn to,
No one to lean on.
Things may be bleak,
But this I know.
You my dear,
Are never alone.

Standing guard,
At the gates of hell.
Protecting the world,
From the evils of the past.
Ever vigilant,
Never faltering.
Unnamed protector,
Dispatcher of horrors.

Sitting in my dreary room,
Cold and drafty.
Space heater pumping out warm air,
Still I am chilled to the bone.
Shivering as I attempt to type,
Sounding out words with chattering teeth.
Physically drained from a long day at work,
It will lead to my untimely demise.
Searching for thoughts of comfort,
A reason to smile.
A text,
I smile.

Drowning in the world,
Screams muffled by nothing.
No time to breathe,
To slow down,
To stop...
Body ceases,
Eyes go blank.
The world is once more the victor,
And I am,
Nothing once more.

When you lay your head down,
Do you see me as you close your eyes?
Hear my voice,
As you drift off into slumber?
Am I your knight,
Your prince charming pursuing your rescue?
Take your leap from the tower,
I will be there to catch you.
Fight for you,
Even though you'd never ask

It's been two long months,
I need to see your face.
I want to hold you tight,
Your body against mine.
I don't want to hide anymore,
This secret is killing me.
Emerge in the warm sun,
Your hand in mine.
Please don't refuse me,
Cause darlin' you'll lose me.
I miss the sound of your voice,
Your laugh.
Soft blue eyes,
Smile.
I've lost my train of though...

I quit,
I'm done,
I can't go on.
The bell has wrung,
The fight is over,
The war not won.
I stayed strong as long as I could,
The smile on my face has run its course.
I cannot keep the facade up anymore,
I quit

All I do is dream of you,
I toss and turn,
Flail and flounder.
I close my eyes,
And I see your face,
My heart goes pitter patter.
I never sleep,
I lay awake,
In hopes you were in my arms.
Because all I can do is dream of you,
When we are far away.

I can't go on living like this,
I can't go on being this way.
When I walked out your door,
Inside me I wanted to stay.
Hold you tight,
Kiss you softly.
I hate to sound cliche,
But you made me this way.
You are the drug I need,
I hate not letting you know.
But this ran through my head,
As I walked out the door.
Too proud of my heart,
Unsure of my actions.
This isn't puppy love,
But full on attraction.
You have me hook line and sinker,
And you don't even know.
All these things through my head,
As I walked out the door.

I'm ready to plummet,
Feel the wind rush through my hair.
Whistle in my ears,
Escape my lungs.
I'm ready to dive,
Into the depths of something.
Leap into the world,
Pounce upon life's journey.
I'm ready to fall,
Into her arms,
In hopes she is there to catch me.

I feel like a fool when I'm near you,
I want to hold you.
I love you,
And no one knows but me.

As soft as the gentle rain falls,
Is how much I've fallen for you.
Gentle it may seem to be,
But with force and vigor it truly is.
You have stolen me completely,
And I am forever your gentle rain.

If I walked the world with my head held high,
Would I see the horrors of the world?
Will I see the light through rose tinted glasses,
Could I fall for her and not get hurt?
Is the grass always greener,
Is there always a silver lining to the darkest cloud?
Or am I just dreaming about things that can only be found,
Somewhere over the rainbow.

Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray into my head she doesn't creep.
Into my thoughts she must not follow,
If she finds my heart she'll find it hollow.
I want her too much,
She makes my heart flutter and such.
But she's wants another,
So I shall not bother.
Into my dreams I will escape,
A frown on my face will only be draped.

It was a cool summer day,
In a land far far away.
Oh to go back to that day,
Would be very risque.
And yet,
Somehow.
It would be amazing,
To go back to that day,
That was so far far away.

Some times when you want to write,
You fight for inspiration.
And yet,
When you don't want to write,
Inspiration smacks you right in the face.
I have just been smacked in the face,
And all I can come up with is this.

She looks through me,
Like cellophane.
In her world,
I don't exist.
But she,
She is my whole being,
My universe.
If I could help her see,
Maybe,
Just maybe.
Only that chance will never come,
And if it did I wouldn't take it.
To drag her down with me,
Is not what is meant to happen.
She is meant to fly,
But I,
I am meant to walk.

My heart is guarded by stone forged steel,
To let no one in I shall not dare.
Break down this wall,
Bring me into the light to shine.
To be one with the world again,
To love,
To feel,
To be.
I don't want to hold back,
But I fear I must.
To call upon the world again,
To only fall upon deaf ears.

Your bright blue eyes that made me smile,
Are closed forever.
Your beautiful smile that brightened any room,
Shall only brighten heaven now.
Your time has come to dance with the angels,
But our friendship will never stop.
Shine your smile down upon us,
All your friends and familiy you left behind.
Be with us until we meet again,
In heavens bright sunshine.

Here I sit,
In this dark and cold room,
I miss you.

I look in your eyes and I lose myself,
All my pain melts away.
All my anger subsides,
I get lost in you.
I wish I knew how you think,
I want to cross your mind.
Your eyes have stolen my heart,
You have runoff with me.
I want to lose myself with you,
I want to hold you again.
You have no idea what you have done to me,
If only I had the strength to tell.

She stood outside in the cold and drab darkness of night,
Looking to the starry heavens.
Her clear blue eyes filled with tears,
Her lips trembled and quaked in despair.
A gust of wind picked up,
And her blonde hair flew like a flag in a storm.
I see her in the distance,
And cry out her name.
Nothing but silence leaves my lips,
She stares on through my call.
I try to run to her,
But my legs feel like jell-o covered molasses.
I reach to grab her arm and pull her towards me,
She is miles away and out of reach.
I feel as though I have lost her,
I turn and quietly disappear.
She was standing right by me,
I failed to see her...

I can't seem to sleep,
You make my heart skip a beat.
I avoid eye contact with you,
Because it's me you see right through.
You make me flutter,
And stutter.
I really wish you knew,
Exactly what you do.

This night was a bust,
Time for me to fly.
Lose my persona of this world,
Spread my wings and take to the sky.
I will fly to the heavens,
Or plummet to hell.
I've lost all faith,
I don't care where I dwell.
I'll sleep below the crust,
Become one with my maker.
It won't matter to me,
As to who is my souls taker.
My heart will lay dormant,
Cold and alone.
Never to care again,
Just thought you should know.
I'm giving up,
And giving in.
This will not happen again,
This dagger in my back.
I'm gone with summers wind.

lAying my Head down, cloSing my eyes, wishing to awake and find a surprise. Of you in my arms, no cause for alarm. Wishing these dreams to come true, as I dream of you.

A jumbled mess,
Suffer from stress.
Need to see you,
Help push me through.
Guiding light,
Keep you in sight.
Push and pull of life,
Suffering strife.
I need you,
Help push me through.

There's no place like the road,
The place I used to call home.
For four summers long,
I will sing this song.
The places,
The faces.
The sweat and the tears,
Hasn't been seen for three long years.
Going back on the road,
There's no place like HOME.

Watch the moon light dance on the ground,
Open your ears and listen for the sound.
The sound of silence,
Crickets,
Gentle summer breeze.
Smells that wash memories loose,
Memories of the past that seem so aloof.
The stars twinkle in the night sky,
Reach to the heavens never wondering why.
Into the dark you fade in the night,
Only to wake in the morning light.

I woke up this morning,
Began to write this all down.
Couldn't seem to find the handle,
As everything began to fall apart in my hands.
Jumbled thoughts,
Mashed up feelings.
I just can't seem to shake it,
I've lost my touch.
Shake off the rust,
And get back to the basics.

I feel something deep inside,
Every time I wish you were near.
I want to hold you again,
I miss your sweet smile.
You are different from all the rest,
And you use that to your advantage.
Time stops when I see you walk in the room,
I guess the moral of the story is...
I miss you.

What ** beauty before me is this,
An angel amongst the common.
Nay I am not a stranger in the night,
But a slave to the mighty Cupid’s arrow.
Thou hast the beauty of Aphrodite,
And a smile that is as bright as a thousand suns.
Dost thou have a name?
For if thy name is as beautiful as a rose,
Thou wouldst be in my hands,
In my warm embrace.
Might I call upon thee,
Or shall my voice fall upon deaf ears?
For the beauty before my eyes,
Not only is beauty ever lasting,
But an angel amongst the common.

Close your eyes,
Tilt your head towards the sky.
Let each drop of rain gently caress your face,
Soft to the touch,
Cool to the senses.
Let nothing but the wind be what you hear,
Close off all your senses but your ears.
Become only one with sound,
The pitter patter of the rain,
Each splash will keep you sane.
Just close your eyes,
And drown out the world.

You send shivers down my spine when you walk in,
Cause the butterflies to flutter like mad.
When you look in my eyes,
You burn right through me.
You are the sunshine when my skies are clouded,
The light when I can't find the good in the world.
I could be all that you need,
You are all that I want.
My stomach knots when you are next to me,
You make me nervous and giddy.
I smile at the thought of you,
Quake in your presence.
You have all control over me,
And you don't even know it.

On stormy days I think back,
To the time where she was with me.
She would dance,
She would sing.
She was gorgeous,
Like the rain.
A beautiful storm in her own right,
Nature's finest creation.
I was just the stepping stone,
I was her drizzle.
I opened the stage for her to amaze,
To release her storm on the world.
If I am drizzle,
She is a hurricane.

Let me carry your banner again,
Be the knight who will give you everything.
Shed every ounce of blood,
For the glory of you.
Raise you up on the marble pedestal of love,
All for you to be happy.
Flying your colors,
Waving your banner as I ride off to fight.
Hoping to return victorious to you again,
Even if only a kiss is my reward.

I want to tell you my darkest secrets,
Trust you,
Hold you tight.
I want to be the one there for you,
Always,
Keep you warm at night.
I can be your superman,
Protect you,
Stand up for you in a fight.
All these things I'd do for you,
I'll be faithful,
I'll be true.
I will provide you with what you need,
Love and Hope,
Just be with me.

I bottle up my rage,
Hold it tight inside of me.
To release it would be dangerous,
To show it could be deadly.
Red hot anger that rivals that of Hell,
Anger that could rock the world at its core.
To keep my self calm is a feat of strength,
To force a smile is what I need to do.
I will never unleash the beast inside of me,
But to turn and run towards serenity and peace.

I bow my head,
And fall to my knees.
Head hangs in shame,
I've hidden my true self from you.
Battered and tattered,
Cut and gashed.
Lost the battle,
Retreated from the war.
Internal battle with myself,
External war of shyness.
I'm not as strong as I thought,
Only to hide in myself once again.

Gone from my mind,
Left everything behind.
No trace of disappearance,
No bread crumb trail.
Vanished without a trace,
Just to escape this place.
This place of emptiness,
Hole of lifeless despair.
Find the clean crisp air,
Hide from the city lights.
Burst into the sky,
Fly with angels on high.
I will be gone from thought,
If only for awhile.